Being judged

I'm sorry that you're being judged, BeagleMan.

I'm forty years old, and I don't have children either. And I never will.

Hello Beagleman:

Sorry, that you are going through this. It's totally uncalled for. As mentioned, it's none of his business what you do in your life.

Some people are plain "idiots". They like bullying people to make themselves feel better and bigger. They especially like to bother the kind and quiet people. Perhaps he is having home or other problems and taking his frustrations out on other people. Maybe he's jealous of you for some reason. I'm guessing, he was like this in school.

There are millions of people who are unmarried without kids who are quite happy with their lives. Others, who can't find their soulmate. Even some who marry their soulmates get divorced. I've read that a lot of the Millennials have no desire to get married after seeing so many other people getting divorced, including parents and aunts/uncles. Some want to dedicate their lives to their jobs, some hoping they will build up their finances, so they can enjoy their retirement of traveling, etc.

Maybe you should look for one or two of his weak spots. Then when he bugs you again, you could throw that in his face. Of course, that would be a last resort, especially if you think he is a better fighter.

My Hubby mentioned that one because he was bullied in school and at work a few times, since he was only 126 lbs. during those times. Then he took martial arts classes and built his muscles up since he figured something was going to come up again at some point. Sure enough it did several times and he dealt with it both physically twice and verbally. He made a fool out of the other guys. My Hubby is a kind, smart but quiet Guy(he's not quiet with me ). No one better push his button or he'll figure out a way to put the abuser out.

Of course, going to HR with your complaint would be the first choice since bullying is supposed to be 0 tolerance at school and work. If a person is being harrassed then neither party is able to do their job properly.

Do you get councelling or a therapist? That is helpful too, if you get a good one.

You are definitely not alone by a long shot. Good Luck getting rid of the .........!!

Post Edited (msOuchie) : 10/4/2019 7:21:32 PM (GMT-6)

Hello all thankyou for your kind words. It is not my intention to get back at this person who upset me. I found it so hard he kept talking even when he could see i was upset.
Look another college asked the same question about not having children and when i said i had none he mocked me and said you just like fu.... woman. I felt so small.
I cannot explain why i deserve so much disrespect.
So people think i hate children have no repect for women or family and selfish and a person of no values.

Hi
Sorry i have been venting, struggling a bit with depression.
Have been binge eating sugar, icecream
i seem to go up and down.

Last year my dog died and this was hard.
Also had prostate cancer and prostatectomy,
slowly getting better.

Sorry my posts seem bad. I was frustrated, life is hard.
Thankyou for your support.

I've never had anyone give me a hard time about the fact that I don't have any kids at age 40. I guess I've been lucky.

Hey beagle
I go thru this all the time.
Female 57
Really never?
Did you abort?
You dont like kids?
What are you diagnosed with
Ugh on and on

NOW, I tell them part of my Truth. I was sex trafficed by my father starting at age 10.
The shock alone shuts them up. Dont want to know the answer, dont ask.
And I, walk away as gently as possible.

Really, none of anyones buis.

BnotAfraid,

I am so very, very sorry that happened to you. You must be very strong to have come from that background and still be able to come here and support other people - although I can imagine that even people saying you are strong could be triggering. Ugh, how horrid.

I can't imagine people asking about children and all that all the time. I am 60, never married, no children and no one ever asks me about it. Except maybe at the Drs office where it actually might make a difference. Now I'm wondering what I'd say if they did ask, and then how I'd react if they got all judgemental about it.

I suppose a therapist would suggest something like, "No, I don't have children, and it's very personal and I'd rather not talk about it", followed by quickly introducing another subject.

Peace.