I beleive my mother suffers from major deppresion, but what can I do?

My aunt passed away October 2004 (My mothers only sibling here in the states) and her best friend…they called each other for everything and nothing…since my aunt passed my moms health has been steadily declining...her main problems are with her digestive system, bloating, chronic abdominal pains, heartburn...she eats very little but she still bloats up and is absolutely miserable.

Doctors have run every test and all have come up negative...My theory is major depression...I personally have been on antidepressants since 1994 and will remain on medications for the rest of my life.

I have mentioned depression many times to my mother, however she does not believe that one can suffer from such physiological effects and it not be an illness…she believes that if it were depression she would feel sad and or have feelings of suicide, her only bad feeling is loneliness…I've tried to explain to her that depression can be purely physiological and the aches and pains that accompany it are very real.

Anyway my mother is 74 and she will not mention the word depression to her doctors, I don't know why they don't suggest a psychiatrist or at least prescribe an antidepressant...she has other signs of depression such as irritability, fatigue, trouble sleeping, trouble concentrating, periods of highs, periods of extreme lows and so on.

Any suggestions?

I mentioned depression to her gasterinologist...she said they have to rule every possible other illnesses out first...she (doctor) just had a baby so she won't be back for a few months.

Hi,

Some of the symptoms you have mentioned are very often found in psychosomatic illnesses. It is usually very difficult to deal with the demise of a close family member. As you have mentioned, she not only has to deal with the hard fact of death, she also has to deal with loneliness.

You can handle this problem in one of two ways. Best option is for you to talk to her primary care physical and get her on anti-depressant on a trial basis. These will have an immediate effect on her condition. As you take them, you know the soothing effect of these medicines.

If she is resistant to the idea of taking anti-depressant, you will have to resort to healing the environment. As you have mentioned, her main problem is loneliness. Please try to address this problem whatever means possible. If possible you or your siblings can spend more time with her, if not physically at least over the phone. The best antidote would be if she gets to spend more time with the grand children. Nothing heals the loneliness of old age like the company of grand children. If this is not feasible, get her involved in community activities, like local church, or school or club. If she develops a meaningful circle of friends that will keep her busy, she will be less bothered about loneliness.

She is blessed to have a concerned child like you.

Cheers,

HealingBay

Great ideas to try to put some sparkle back into your lives.  Sista J you are always right on.  Kudos to you.

HealingBay

Welcome to HealingWell and that was a great first post. I am Kitt and you gave our member some great advice.  The difficult thing now days with talking to a patients PCP is the HIPPA Privacy rules.  So hopefully Papa Bear your Mother has at least signed a release giving the Dr. permission to share your Mothers medical conditions, treatments and test results with you.

Is there a senior center where you live Papa Bear as they offer great day trips plus lots of activities at the centers, not sure how mobile your Mother is.

Hugs to all.

Kitt