I had to post my first time here because it's my first time here, too, and because Melissa, you and I apparently share a great deal. Right down to first names. But also, there's so much in what you described that mimics my situation. I'm ending a horrible relationship, and though that's a good thing, it's left me incredibly alone and lonely. I'm considerably older, which is another problem, in that I'm not at prime dating age, and there is no way I can see for me to make new contacts or friends, let alone maybe meet someone I can feel love with again. I'm about to move, also, which is a huge financial as well as emotional burden. I'll be having to figure out how to re-create a life for my 10-year old son and myself, and yet juggle an insane work schedule.
I spend most days feeling crushingly sad, fighting off tears, and just struggling to maintain composure. I don't have the ability to set up any therapy sessions, though I know I need to. My friends are all disappearing; misery does NOT love company, but drives people away. I don't complain to anyone, or say anything as it seems nobody likes a whiner.
I guess I'm hoping to find that this is a place where I can express feelings without being worried that my words will be taken wrong, or that I'll send more dear ones heading for the hills.
Thank-you for being here right now.