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It`s been a while but i`m in need of some support

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Depression
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Posted 10/27/2010 5:00 AM (GMT 0)
For those who know me i have many issues to deal with in my life.Depression has moved back in well infact it`s been back for a while but have been trying to ignore it .At the moment it`s taking over and i think worse than i have ever had it .

I`m on medication which has been changed a few weeks ago .What is really getting to me is this if you could call it a side effect or it may be something not even related to the drugs or my depression i have no idea.All i know is that it is increasing and i have no idea why . I saw my local GP here last week and he told me that not only has my heart rate increased dramatically not my blood pressure is getting really high .

I asked him to see if he can cut down on some of the many medications im on i`m just so over taking tablets breakfast consists of 14 tablets.Then there is the evening dosage .

I now see my psychologist every three weeks but also a councillor every week to get help before something happens .

I have so many other medical problems which include cancer,celiac disease,rheumatoid arthritis ,Liver damage from the recent chemotherapy  and also several problems with the blood also due to therapy from several of the drugs .

I just feel as though i want to sleep and do not want to be around anyone ,some of my friends i know i`m even ignoring them in a bit to be by myself .

The local GP here is ok he is not the one i was seeing due to the fact my other one had a serious car accident and after seeing him the other day would definately not go back to seeing him because i feel he should still be at home recovering not looking after sick people he falls asleep on his patients but this was happening before he had his accident it was probably yhe cause of his accident .

Snowflake

Posted 10/27/2010 6:35 AM (GMT 0)
Im really sorry that youre feeling so down and it sounds like youre going through a lot.  But dont pile balme and guilt onto yourslef over something you had no control over.  Your doctor did NOT get in his car accident because of you.  You had nothing to do with it.  Dont give your negative voice that power over you.  As for your friends, Im sure they understand why you dont feel like being around them and Im also sure that they aer worried about you and probably miss you.  Im sorry if nothing I said helps but know that Im thinking about you.  I hope you feel better.  Hugs--Courtney
Posted 10/27/2010 10:51 AM (GMT 0)
Glad you had the presence of mind to see that the old GP is due to retire. And you got someone else. Good.
Aren't you seeing other docs too? You are on alot of meds, and it would be good for some one person to oversee the whole works.
The desire to sleep and not be around friends sounds like, as you know, depression. Do you think you need different anti-depressants, or a dose switch?
Sometimes a short visit with a friend is beneficial, even tho you have to fight with yourself to do it. Keep it short. Say, gee its been great, but have to cut this short today, time for me to go (even if its at your house) Pick someone you really enjoy.
Keep posting. People are here for you.
Posted 10/27/2010 2:08 PM (GMT 0)
Snowflake, your plate is so full at the moment, but it is great to see you posting here. Take very good care of you
Posted 10/27/2010 3:53 PM (GMT 0)
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snowflake

Good to see you here and knowing you are comfortable coming back is awesome.  We are always here for you.  Keep on fighting the battle as you may have down times but you are always a winner in my book.

Hugs,

Kitt

Posted 10/29/2010 1:57 AM (GMT 0)
Courtney.... i dont blame myself for the drs accident it was all his own doing ,he works seven days a week and all day far too much when there is no need for it there are four other drs here now but he thinks he must keep going .

Trying to Understand .....i thought it was best to have a second opinion as to me problems hence i saw the other dr who i feel very comfortable with .The councillor i`m currently under has put a cancer nurse incharge of my case and her job is to keep all drs involved in my issues and up to date notification and a few other things which will certainly help me because atm i`m very confused with it all .

Awty..... thank you for your comment i indeed have a lot on my plate much more than i can cope with atm .

Kitt .... hello dear friend it has been a long time since i was in here but have thought of you all a lot but have just not had the energy nor words as to what to say .I find heallingwell a very friendly and warm place to put my thoughts down .
Since we last spoke there have been many issues which has come though my life and one which i hope will remain for ever .My most beautiful daughter gave birth to an awesome little boy .Lachlan is the one who even though he is only four months old this past Saturday he is my inspiration to keep going .he loves me as much as i love him infact today and the next few i am caring for him .His smile and little giggle really melts my heart and helps me noend to put my problems in the draw .
As fro my other daughter she has finally moved out and most days i lock my house to keep her out she still treats me like dirt so if i lock her out then i do not have to put up with it and her disguisting language .
This time during this very low bout of depression i have a fantastic councillor who will see me when ever i need to talk no matter when or where but i keep it to an appointed time she has made a great difference but as you know its a very long road we travel in our battle to fight off depression .
SNOWFLAKE
Posted 10/29/2010 2:07 AM (GMT 0)
It does sound like you have it together. Despite your trials and tribulations. Glad you are comfortable coming here to vent. Your story is an inspiring one of courage.
Thanks
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