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Posted 1/25/2011 3:52 AM (GMT 0)

Hey everyone, I am new here and I have many issues. My boyfriend of a year and a half and I, broke up three months ago. I know it may seem like not a long time to be this upset over a realtionship, but I'm younger then most people who have relationships this long. Anyway, since we broke up, I can't sleep, I stay up playing the break up in my head. I can't eat, I dropped 10lbs in two weeks and keeping losing more weight, this would be okay with me except now I'm about 96lbs and shrinking. I channel all my anger and depression into working out which is unhealthy for me because I am so small. I have no desire to go out into the world and explore new people or new men. I know I was meant to live my life with him and I can't seem to let go of our relationship. I find myself lying to him constantly just so I can talk to him for a day. I talk to a therapist but it doesn't really help. I know the only thing that will help is having him back in my life and that doesn't seem like an option right now, so I feel as if I'm going to be stuck like this forever. I'm going to college in the fall, and I'm really afraid that if I go away, he will forget about me and I'll lose any hope of being with him. I need help and I have no clue what to do. Thanks for reading <3 

Posted 1/25/2011 6:29 AM (GMT 0)
hi scrantongrl. sorry about your situation, sometimes being apart is a good thing. if it is meant to be it will be. facing similar issues. hey, your a good person, so stop punishing yourself, ok. maybe a chat with your dr. may help. maybe an anti-depressant might help. it sucks, i know, but be you be true and love you. you have been brave in posting, keep being brave, ok. with healing compassion, jamie, male, 38.

Posted 1/25/2011 2:04 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there,

Welcome to the Depression forum.  I think once you start college that things are going to change for you.  You will gain new interests.  The most important being studying, and learning.  But you will also meet other guys.  And that is going to surprise you because you will think less of your ex boyfriend.  I mean less often. 

I think you will be surprised at how things are going to change for you.  You will get over your ex, and as Jamie said, if it is meant to be, it will.  You never know.  I know you are young, and there is a lot to learn.  But you sound mature and I think you will handle this situation just fine.  Try not to make up things to be with him.  That can get into a bad habit.  And people wont take you seriously.

With that being said, I hope that you are feeling a little better now.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 1/28/2011 2:50 AM (GMT 0)
I also agree with Jamiee. Just love yourself. Get strong within yourself. Easier said than done, I know. Do things you love to do - without him. After a while you will get really used to doing things without him and possibly not even miss him. Then you'll finish the day without thinking about him at all. Calling him is just sure to make you more miserable and irritate him, so why? Show him how strong and confident you are without having anything to do with him. If you're meant to be, it may be just what he needs. If not - well, you have lots of fun at college to look forward to. (And don't worry about losing the weight for this short time - see your doctor if you are having any problems from it, otherwise just don't worry).
Posted 1/28/2011 3:35 AM (GMT 0)
hey there pal. i know what you mean, in high school, i was dangerously thin. it was my way of coping. you seem to already know why this isn't healthy,. you're good. you're good. sometimes boyfriends aren't the best help. my ex boyfriend was a good guy, but he didn't know how to help me. it's scary not having a boyfriend. you''re good though. and someday you'll have the best boyfriend ever, don't give up that truth, but at the same time, what you need more than a boyfriend is a less complicated person to let you know that you are soooo worth it!!!! you'll find that person. and you can take a baby step in loving yourself too.
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