feeling so... guilty.

alright, i don't know where else to go, i guess i'll just tell my whole story and just be okay with what ever comes my way. i was a good kid my whole life, valedictiorian, honors society, running track, perfect christian girl, then all of a sudden, i couldn't fake being happy any more, and it got so bad i had to be on medical leave my last two months of highschool, and then dropped out of college three times. i've now changed my meds several times, i am so frustrated. i'm doing okay but not really. i've failed everything, and i do mean everything. i don't know what else to do. and all my friends have abandoned me. but i don't know how to have friends, i've never been good at the whole friendship thing. i wish i was better.

Good Morning Batgirl,

I am so sorry to hear you are experiencing depression at such a young age.  I know exactly how you feel as my depression sent me into a major depressive state in 2005.  I felt so alone and did not think I would ever make it through as well as all my friends moved on and I was left behind.

With lots of therapy and many different med changes I did make it through and so will you. 

Never lose hope in dealing with your fears and depression. Notice your feelings, figure out what's real, ask 'so what?', make it bigger than life, walk through it, and celebrate who you are. Do these things, make them habits, expose the ridiculousness of your fears (but in a loving way), and all by themselves they'll go away in time..Keep the faith and stay strong.

Kindly,

Kitt