update

Hi Maggie, Karen,

I am in the new home, the new incomplete home. The challenges persist but we are not being passive in addressing them. Feel like crying under my blankets a fair bit, but then face another challenge and feel better. Got the rental mostly cleaned today. Hubby is more his nice self after having a breather from things.

Hope things get better. This has been a huge ordeal. If anyone is thinking of building a home, my advice is don't do it unless you have no other option. The stress is beyond, and the risks are too. At least we are still in tact.

Will be busy cleaning the house now that the rental is finally cleaned.

take care, embers

hang in there embers. luv 2 ya. jamie

Sound of like it is just sinking in..."home"... Your home... you're home............ I am so happy for you.

And yes. convenient mainfloor laundry. Can't beat that... NOt with a stick... lol... As you know I go to the laundromat. Got to do that soon again.

It was nice here today. Sunny and not too cold, but sweater cold. I walked Jasmine in the sunshine. We both loved it.

Well, I am heading for bed. So this wont be a long post. Got to get my good nightts sleep if I can. Since this morning I was woke up for snoring. I was on my back instead of on my side. Oh well... I didn't hear anything...........lol...

Have a good night Embers...

Hugs, Karen

HIIIII EMBERS!!!!

Congrats on the house!!! I agree, I would not do it again, but you will start to know every nook and cranny and it will become home.

Thanks Karen for mentioning my company...I will be back tomorrow, hope to talk with you embers and all my friends then...it's funny embers I was just wondering how you were doing today and here you are

Good to hear drom all of you

Maggie

Oh I amso thrilled about the paino and you are playing..such good therapy for me..music is awesome!!! Sorry it is a little warped///I have to confess, we have a "Keyboard" (a nice one)
Since we live on stilts, no waterbeds or pianos, they say.

I know, you know your house like most people don't, cause you remember whenit was a wood skeleton, then with siding, insulation , electrical then drywaall, the flooring going in, ever little thing, so it is a more intimate relationship w/ a home you built...it will simply mean more to you than you imagine and ina year, it will" Do you remember when....?" and you will laugh.

Terrific friends w/ sister...we ciccle like schoolgirls, but can talk the heavy stuff too..I miss her so much

Slep t for poo last night and busy day ahead. Lord , give me the strength to be gracious and kind all day-

So happy to hear from you dear, please keep posting.. we enjoy yr comapny

Maggie

Hi Maggie,

My heart was so warmed when I read this: "Lord , give me the strength to be gracious and kind all day." If everyone had a heart like that the world would be quite shining with beauty.

I am realizing that there are many things about this house that we had no control over but that turned out just beautifully. Eg: there is a window that was added as an afterthought by the architect and it just happens to frame a tree perfectly and is the view right behind where my desk fits. So I can see it when I'm working on my puter. The front windows make it really homey - the sun pours in just perfectly to brighten the living room and make couch sitting cozy.

The teeny bedroom doesn't feel teeny after all. We switched the space of the fridge and the pantry, and now when we come in from stocking up shopping the pantry is first, so easy to unload things.

It has really turned out well when it comes to custom build. And I love the colors and how these things worked out. Nice big kitchen. The finishings are laughable - some crooked wall corners, crookedly installed kitchen cabinets! ugh. I could name a few other things, but these are cosmetic things and not overly noticeable.

Finished the returns we needed to do tonight re. house stuff. And most things are moved out of the rental FINALLY. Husband said he'd go back for the rest tomorrow. I hope he does. I figure the returns = the last thing I 'have' to do with him for awhile.

I told him a couple weeks ago to either go back on meds. or stay away from me. He went back on a reasonable dose of celexa. He is less of a crank. Just hard to have so little in common in the way of our approach to life and people. Though hopefully some common ground will reappear soon.

I guess the piano may stay awhile. I would love a new one, but we have a very significant debt load to repay as is. I guess the husband will likely have a say in how that will go.

I'm so glad you have a good relationship with your sister. That sounds really wonderful.

Karen, I guess now you are also updated on the house thing my way. How was your day? Did you take Jasmine out for a walk? It was snow covered today - the trees were so pretty! We have five little trees out back that you can see perfectly through the kitchen window - another thing we couldn't have planned but that turned out beautifully on its own. With a little help from above I'd say! :0)

Jamie, hope your day is going well and that you're getting good support your way. You give so much - hope you are receiving good encouragement back!

Take care you guys,

embers

thx very much embers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jamie.

Hey you guys,

It is so comforting to be able to come here and share together, isn't it. A refuge of friends.

This house...wow, this is the first winter in 3 years we've been able to run the furnace. The rental = mold = no furnace. We used heaters only. So it feels sooo good to have 'real' heat again! It feels so good to have a home. Sooooo good.

Jamie, I'm just thinking of your other post where you shared some of what you have suffered. We have experienced a degree of homelessness too. Never on the streets, but at times sleeping in our vehicle, couch surfing, and going from crappy rental to crappy rental.

This house was supposed to be a 'charitable' project because we have low income and I have so many sensitivities and had not been able to access healthy housing. However, we were duped. The contractor was pocketing money for himself and ended up quitting part way through, tried to take us for $20 k or thereabouts. Next contractor, it took us 2 months before we realized they weren't doing it as a charitable project! THough at least one of the head builders seems to have a heart. We've got mounds of debt to pay back but my faith is sure there will be a way.

Karen, the birdfeeder...wow, I havn't even had time to think that far ahead. That will be lovely! Right now we are still living among boxes. I still have to seal the grout in the tiles. Stuff like that.

Yes, Maggie, a lot of similarities. I hope your h will stay the course to get back on meds! Today, things are tense with the husband. I apologized for any way I was wrong which was an open door for him to tell me how he felt I was wrong...and yet another argument. I feel relieved that at least I don't have to deny or pretend anymore, but also sad that what should be a joyous celebration of coming home is tainted by the realization that this marriage is not going well. He is back on celexa, but he seems to be missing something. I am just going to take things one day at a time.

hope everyone is having a safe and kind day, embers

Thanks Karen. He was still taking a very minimal dose of celexa all along apparently. But you are right, I need to give it time. He needs time to rest as well. It is just all of this has brought things to the surface.

Yes, I will enjoy the house. Good advice. :0)

Warm floors, that is what's different! lol! Even with the space heaters getting the room warm, the floors would still be colder.

I went to look for christmas decorations today. Now that we have a home, we want to get a Christmas tree. Happy thoughts. :0)

Hope you are having a nice day, embers

thx 4 sharing embers, re homelesness, jamie

thx karen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey you guys,

Can you list some names of mood stabilizers that you are familiar with? Do they have many side effects? I would love for his moods to even out.

Slept in today. I didn't really get a break on the week-end from the house, or the husband. So was good to rest. The buidlers aren't coming till later today or tomorrow.

Have to figure out a way to make the out of tune oversized dusty as all get out piano work until someone comes who will want to buy it.

I have been sitting here for about 20 minutes telling myself why everything is going to be okay, why I can be happy despite feeling stuck in this marriage etc. I guess once the day starts and I'm moving around I will feel less like crying.

Hope everyone has a good day today! embers

Risperdol and Abilify are good mood stabilizers too. I take the abilify though I took the risperdol too, but the abilify worked better. Plus it makes your antidepressant work better. I have had no side effects from the abilify.

I hope that this helps.

Hugs, Karen