Understanding sons depression

Ticopuppy,

Welcome to the forum.

Feeling "nothing" most likely means he is feeling numb. Which means there is something going on.

It is good that he is in therapy and seeing a doc. It took me 7mos to go from numb to realizing I was repressing memories from 29 yrs ago I am now 51.

Give your son time and just let him know you are there for him; without judgements. That is the biggest thing. People judging how he can not help being they way he is right now is so hard. I can guarantee he does not like it anymore than you do. It is not a good feel. It feels like you are lost and have no life preserver to grab on to. However, it does not last and he will come through this.

You sound supportive and the fact you are reaching out here shows you care, I might suggest that you get a list of questions together and ask them in a family session with your son and his therapist. This can be very bonding if done with low tones and non-violent communication. [I use non-violent communication because when depressed, we perceive things differently] It can also answer so many of your questions.

I wish you the best with your son, I pray he knows how much he is loved by you.

Stay strong and continue to post if it helps you, we are here to support and listen

Trina

Thank you so much for the welcome and advice. Everything we do and how we talk with our family in general is always calm. My husband and I have been married 27 years and don't ever fight. The therapist has been great about asking questions to break the ice and get the ball rolling.

I just don't understand the feeling "numb". When I'm depressed I feel sad, angry, down, etc.. but I "feel". His psychologist said this is emotional and not a chemical imbalance or disorder. He is considering asking to increase his medication.

He knows for sure that we love and support him. We'll get through this, it will just be baby steps.

Ticopuppy,

I will try to explain the feeling numb for you. it is a little different for some people. However in the past2 years that I have spent in some group settings, it is generally the same when we talk about. What happens is the mind shuts down all feeling so you don't have to deal with a particular feeling that is giving you trouble, there is no chooseing. It is all or nothing.

So when you are numb, this is actually what you are feeling in place of emotions. As if you have received a shot of novacain in your emotion maker.

Underneath the numbness is scared, in the back of the mind you're thinking why am I not feeling anything. There is something wrong with me. You can't figure it out, so you just tell people you are fine and hope it goes away, like the emotional pain you were feeling, did.

This all just happens, a person does not choose it. The mind/body does this for survival.

He won't see until he is on the other side, healing from whatever it was that emotionally hurt him.

I am sorry that he has to deal with this, but he apparently is a very strong young man. Blessed with a good family. It will
take time, but he will start to feel again and you all will help him.


Trina.