Posted 11/3/2012 7:01 PM (GMT 0)
Hello Everyone,
I was reading another thread that was locked due to so many comments. Is this the new Cipralex thread?
I am writing my post so that others (like myself) can read it. It will be long and I will list many symptoms and the whole nine yards but if you are wondering if you might need to consider a medication--please read.
I must say it is interesting to read what other people are experiencing with the drug and does make me realize that a drug might be able to help me. I am a very natural person so the idea of taking a drug is not something that sits well with me. My entire family is on a form of anti depressant and has been for some time. My mother and my sister have Fibromyalgia as well. I don't think there is anything weak about taking a drug and I realize that for most people depression/anxiety is indeed a chemical imbalance that can only be solved through medication. My desire to live medication free simply makes me question being on a pill for the rest of my life.
I have wondered since I was 15 if I should consider meds after my family approached me about potentially being depressed. I assumed I was just a teenage girl and would get through it. I have a wonderful life, a wonderful family and a wonderful boyfriend and not much to be depressed or anxious about (I am 24 now). I have never been a good student or felt overly intelligent thanks to my inability to concentrate and retain information. I nearly flunked out of College for the second time a couple of years ago as a result of this, a feeling of apathy and lack of motivation. Various events would really get to the core of me and I would not get out of bed for school. Somehow I managed to pull myself together and graduate. I am now in the stage of finding a job that is not in my profession, living with my parents for a year while I save some money and attempting to realize my dreams and aspirations musically, while having a 'normal and non musical' job. No doubt a very confusing time.
I have trouble sleeping, staying asleep and feel tired pretty much every day. I have pretty much cut out coffee after serious feelings of anxiety occurred in the last year of my life, especially in the last 6 months. I DO feel better now that I drink decaf and lots of teas. ESPECIALLY Yerba Mate. The only reason I am drinking coffee right now is because the Yerba tea that I like is hard to find. It wakes you up, no heart palpitations, helps sleep etc. I consider it a miracle and started using it as a treeplanter last year.
I have no sex drive and it affects my relationship. I have a very understanding boyfriend but he can only understand so much. He is younger than I am (21) and in his prime. Unless I am drinking I have no desire for it. I read in an earlier forum that other people have this issue with depression.
I am a professional singer and music is my life. The last couple of years I have found it difficult to love what I do. Most nights I would rather stay home and not do much, instead of making money at gigs doing what I love to do. This is a problem.
Alcohol always lifts my mood and gives me energy. I have pretty much had alcohol every day for the last few years. Anywhere from one beer to much more. This makes me gain weight, not want to wake up early the next day and not get anything done. Once I start drinking it is hard to not want more. I definitely do have days where I don't drink and especially in the last 6 months, but otherwise I have a love for it. Alcohol helps my libido as well. When I do stop drinking and only when I deserve it, I feel happier and less dependant, I have more money and I gain weight less.
A couple of weeks ago I went to my doctor and told him about what I was feeling. He asked me two questions. 1. Does your anxiety come as a result of a bad day? Bad weather? and 2. Does your anxiety come out of the blue?
Since my anxiety comes out of the blue and I do not have anything occurring in my life that would make me feel this way he suggested I try Cipralex instead of talking to someone. I tried 1/2 a 10mg for one day and felt serious dry mouth, a little fatigue and stomach unrest. I know it may be placebo, but I normally feel very anxious at work/to go to work. That morning I felt very even and I did not invest an unnecessary amount of emotions into my conversations/work. Since I am a singer, the dry mouth really freaked me out and my body just felt different therefore, I decided that I was going to try and tackle what I was feeling on my own by cutting out coffee, exercising and doing research.
A couple weeks (maybe a month actually) later, my mom sat me down (this morning) to say that she thinks I am depressed and that I should do some research and try the meds again. Normally this would make me very upset but I just listened and told her that I felt very wierd on the meds (even though it was probably placebo but I am fairly certain it was not). I came online and found the other Cipralex forum and there is where I got emotional. Reading stories of people who deal with zero libido unless alcohol induced, not wanting to get out of bed, wierd side affects etc.
In talking to some friends that also deal and have dealt with depression they recommend not taking the medication unless you can also have counselling, being open to changing your diet and way of life etc. There certainly are things that I need to speak to someone about and hopefully I can get happier/less anxious. I shall post on here how I am doing as I will begin 1/2 a pill this evening for 3 days and then begin taking 1 x 10mg.
Here goes and best of luck to everyone else.