Frustrated

Ok...sorry in advance as I may start to ramble abit. I've always been a lively outgoing woman but I have always had problems with depression as have most in my family, I thought I could handle this without meds as I didn't want to go down that route unless I had no other choice. I've been with my partner for a year and a half now, things have been great, we fell in love and moved in together in may but every now and then I get really sad with our relationship and think it should end and get confused over whether I still love him or not. This has been happening more and more recently so its now most of the time. I used to get so excited about owning my own house and having children but I've lost all interest in it, even thinking about it makes me upset because I think I may not want it with him, I've lost all interest in things we used to do together and never want to be intimate with him anymore, I have quite low self esteem and always think he wants something better. Most of the time he's great but I find myself losing my temper with him so quickly, even if he's trying to do or say something nice. I can't stand how he gets when he drinks and he can't drink much without getting drunk and I end up crying when he goes to bed and I don't know why, I'm just getting so frustrated because I can't figure out if it's the depression making me feel this way about him or him making me depressed. I know this sounds like a really stupid trivial thing but its all I think about and it's driving me crazy and I just hoped for an outside opinion or advice or anything. Thankyou all in advance and sorry again for the rambling.