Chacking back in...

I haven't chatted in a bit, but I wanted to say hello and give some thanks to the people whom sent messages of support after my first posting.

I am feeling a little better these days. I was pretty low towards mid-summer but it seems that things may be looking up. There are many reasons for my depression problems as I know you can all identify with. Has anyone ever had the unfortunate moment of one innocently asking you: "Why are you so depressed?" You can usually quickly end the prospective discussion by replying with a deadpan: "You got 3 hours and a good comfortable chair?" In all seriousness, some days are worse than others. (And some days are really really bad.) I have found that when I take better care of myself in terms of the decisions I make, it tends to decrease the bad days considerably. It is easy to surrender to the depression and tell yourself that you don't have the energy to try and feel better. I do that weekly. However, there are so many simple little details that help me get out of bed. Things that keep me going; Singing 'The Itsy Bitsy Spider" with my 3-year old neice, a great television show, a thunderstorm/afternoon nap, and more.

Many of my high school friends are getting married and having babies all at once. I am single...Attending all the showers, weddings, receptions, etc. has been tough. I thought it would make it easier for me to drink heavily at each event. Well, I overdid it last weekend at my best friend's wedding, I woke up feeling sick, depressed and miserable. I have  chance to redeem myself this weekend at another friends wedding. I am hoping I can hold on to the same glass of champagne for a few hours and keep my wits about me. This way I won't wonder what stupid things I said and did for the next few months.

I guess I am just venting now but it really does help!

Thanks again,

Kat24

Hi Kat24,

I'm fairlydl new to this forum as well.

I can empathize with how you feel. I was "officially" diagnosed with depression in December 2004 though have probably suffered for a lot longer. I have chronic daily migraines which contribute to it.

I often feel like I'm holding a door closed and behind the door is depression. And you're absolutely right, those days that I make the healthy choices it's a lot easier. Those days I don't I'm bracing myself against the door.

If it weren't for my husband I don't know that I would have got out of bed during the last six months. At the worst I made sure I was out of bed and dressed when he came home everyday. Now I get up with him and go to work again.

Recognizing your challenges is half of the battle. Try drinking pop this weekend or maybe wine spritzers or really light coolers; less alcohol. I drink Perrier;  its a fancy drink but no alcohol. If you're sad about being alone do you have any male "friends" you could take with you so you don't feel like you stand out so much.

Good luck! You can get through the weekend!