just so down this morning

i woke up in a foul mood. there was an incident yesterday at work where i made a big mistake. i work on a call line and made a derogatory comment about a customer and evidently the line had not been hung up and the customer heard me. so my boss called me in and played the tape for me and i just feel really bad about making this mistake. like i wish time would hurry and go by so this can be forgotten.

otherwise i just feel like i am dragging myself through things today.

one bright spot is that i try and pray to Higher Power for help. Today for some reason I got the message "there are people who love and care about you". So I am trying to remember that and say it to myself over and over.

i am going on a trip to London Friday and I don't even feel excited. Just sick of so much preparation and details to take care of. Hopefully by the time I leave all of this will be taken care of and I can just relax and enjoy the trip. I did at least admit to myself in my journal today that I don't really care whether I go or not. Even though I have some pretty exciting things planned.

Thanks for listening and I would appreciate positive feedback.

Love,
rich

i am actually looking forward a bit to the flight. it's 9 hours (from USA) but i'm hoping to sleep much of that time. i have anxiety around flying but have been trained how to handle it. plus i'm going with my sister and it will be so nice to have someone to talk to.

i know my anxiety and depression peaks early in the morning (like right now) so i just need to get through this part of the day.

thanks for your feedback.

Rich, that fact that you boss counceled you and did not fire you is an indication of your work ethic and good work history with the company. We all get stressed and make mistakes. No one is perfect.

I believe once you get on your well derserved vacation you will have a wonderful time! Enjoy!

Peace and comfort
Trina