want to connect

       Hi everyone, I am new to this forum but have been reading it for several months and it helps me to see I am not alone with my terrible feelings. I can see the genuine concern and kindness you show to each other.

       I am not usually one to reach out and share my problems with others but my life feels completely out of control right now. Bad news in May of this year set me off in a tailspin of anxiety and worry I had never experienced before. I couldn't sleep or eat and paced back and forth all night and lost forty pounds in less than a month. I was terrified each day when the sun came up and going out of the house.  I finally went to the doctor and was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety along with type 2 diabetes and hypertension.

       I then went through a nightmare of different medications and their side effects. Now I am scared of medication and don't take any but I'm such a mess and I don't know what to do. I could write a book about my various issues and the horrible feelings I have about myself. I don't get anything accomplished out of the things I should be working on and this just feeds the cycle of guilt and remorse. I constantly beat myself up over past mistakes and regrets.

       I have made some progress. I see a therapist. I practice deep breathing and go for walks. I joined a church. These were big steps for me but I feel I am sliding back into despair.

      Well, that's some of my story. Thank you for listening. I feel a little relief now as I type and get things out. I hope you all have a blessed and wonderful day.

Hi Peace,

So you have been lurking??? Glad that you decided to join in. Welcome to the forum!!!

I hope that you give medications another try. As Trina said, they are kind of hit and miss. It may take awhile to find what is right for you.

Therapy is awesome!!! I hope you consider that too. Remember, mistakes is how we learn. Stop beating yourself up!!!

Have a great day today!!!

Hugs, Karen...

Almost every med has side effects when first starting. Many ppl quit meds within the first 4 weeks of taking them bc they don't hold out for the effects to dissipate which they almost always do. Also, it takes AD's minimum of 4 weeks to work, 4-8 weeks is standard so if you don't give them at least 4 weeks, you'll never know.

Some of the common side effects like feeling "weird" in your head, foggy, "off", plus gastric issues almost always go away once the med adjusts. It's those same common and normal side effect that make ppl stop taking them before the med even has a chance to work.

Almost all of us have been on the med "merry go round" & while unpleasant, is worth it when we find the med/combo that works.

So glad you joined us and know we completely understand your struggles and will support you on your journey back to wellness. You can and WILL get better.

Sending peace-
Lisa