oh well.

i guess i am a little defunct again. ah, you get that. sometimes i really dislike time, with the subsequent drones of illness. challenges, guts and determination, the never ending push for wellness that is conducive even to just a little bit of progression. fatigue is the killer. the illness requires energy, it's endless consumption harks out our soul and dwindles our hope that humanity will will stifle this ill wind. the tides will turn, but the boat ride we must take. glory to the brave, and the rewards will be known. for the rest, you may stay but never return.

Ah, I too well know this spot you are in.

Early on in my journey when I magically owned my illness and bat crap. I thought at least I can start to heal. Not truely realizing the adventure in front of me.

about six months later I wrote this poem. I think it just about says it all. If we are strong we will make it dispite outside influences that are negative.

RESCUERS

Rescuers will not be coming today
Where you feel safe, you cannot stay.
Time moves on so must we.
Where evil is allowed, evil will be.

Me.


Peace Mate
Trina

I think you you put this horrid thing into prospective beautifully Turtle.
But as I read you lost me at boat ride; here is why!
A joke I just heard. He it goes

Three men are stuck a drift at sea. After a few days of no food, no water, they find a bottle. They uncork it and a djinni pops out. The djinni grants them each a wish. The first says to the djinni " I miss my wife and kids back home in New York..." Poof he is home. The second man says to the djinni " I too miss my fiancé in Los Angeles.." Poof he is home. The djinni turns to the third man and says " what is your wish?" The man meekly says " I don't know... But I miss my friends already ..."


Yes it's a ride we all take. Funny tho we don't want to be in the boat alone. Lol.

Awe, hope this defunct time pass by quickly...We always hit a bad patch when we least expect it...are you working on your lecture? Might be time to think about that as you could be very helpful.
Probably time for you to play some relaxing tunes...

Hello my shelled friend...If you're not coming out, I'm coming in to get you.  Or...bring snacks and hang a while, if you'll play your tunes! {expletive}lol WHY is it that we all feel such isolation?

I think perhaps the hippies had it right...to a certain extent.  I prefer soap and shampoo, monogamy...However, communal living would have its perks.  I think this especially since my DH and I hit that mid-century mark. Our property is too large for us to maintain for many more years.  It would be nice to live with chosen family close by.  We could work together to get things done, whether shopping, cooking, cleaning, lawn or maintenance.  We could grow vegetables (raised beds please) and flowers.  We would never have to sit just 2 of us at a sprawling table.  We would never have to spend holidays alone again.

We could look after each other with shared chores and talents.  Heck, I'd be happy to have someone ride shotgun with me to the eye doctor. Jamie...You and Deborah could relocate to the states.  Your contributions would be invaluable to the family.  We would have to work on my slow southern drawl and your Aussie slang, along with Deborah's british accent.  It would be a hoot trying to decipher our conversations.

I know...just dreaming...folks don't live in harmony any more, it seems.  Conflict is the "flavor" of the day.  There's just got to be MORE than this...pain unmanaged, limitations, mobility issues.  I'm like a tire.  I've gone the distance for others ALL of my life...rubber to road when others refused...no tread left here.  Help!?

PainSherlock...I emailed you several days ago.  Did you get it?

I'm pathetic aren't I?

Jamie...You know that I'm always in the boat, even when it's capsized. Reach for me, my brotha...and paddle like hell.  Actually, I describe my efforts as futile...much like rearranging the deck chairs on the {expletive} Titanic.  I'm trying to type your word as a nod of respect to you, but man it's difficult.

Hugs to ALL

~Dixie

Dixie ... I get scared of my in box after it my phone says 97 new emails ... Dangers of shopping online.
However I too have that dream. I know it's hippy ( people have called me that , requires a quick sniff to see if they smell me lol, nope ok so it's just my way. You describe the song imagine by my hero John Lennon. Just imagine it. People working together for good or bad. Maybe someday ( the world ) will join us. But it's just a dream right? Could we live like that? Or as a Trekkie can we live in a society like planet earth in Star Trek universe ? One can only dream. Turtle it will get better. You have an amazing way with words. You put it so beautifully in the beginning. The condition does require energy. So reroute power through the main engine. 1/4 impulse power until engineering figures out a better strategy. Let the nacelles cool down. Avoid warp core breech at all costs. If a breech is eminent... Eject the core and run like hell. I think it's a good plan. Sending emergency dilithium crystals should help engine balance. Report to star fleet when energy has been restored. Sherlock out.

Post Edited (Pain$herlock) : 5/5/2015 12:49:28 PM (GMT-6)

Hugs Turtle. Hope you have started feeling better.

I hope you get to make that trip to the destination of your dreams... You are a wise turtle...

Keep hanging in there mate...

Hugs, Karen...

NO, No, NO, this is all wrong! Turtles have shells JUST for this reason. Have none of you ever seen that cartoon from the 40's when the turtle uses his shell for a boat? Ride right through the swamp into the gardeners tomato patch!

Just saying....

Peace out

got hippie type things to do
Trina

i'm busted!!!. just do it!!!!!

Did turtle say train rides ???? Well ... That's just my thing.
So hey as an I did an awesome thing last week. So they pulled in an old steam engine ... If you have seen the polar express movie you've seen a cartoon ( ish ) rendering of this baby. Well I climbed inside I blew that whistle. I got to be Prometheus of the Train Gods. The fire went out and they couldn't get it re lit with matches and they needed my lighter. And they say smoking is bad for you. Humph. ( lol I know ) so the fire in its belly is in a sense MINE! So getting to sit in the engineers bucket ( seat) of 870,000 lbs on iron with a blast furnace in its belly. It get hot as heck in there! My hand on the throttle ... But they would never let me drive her. :-( ..... Yet. She has roughly 126,000 horsepower. OMG ! One of the highlights of my life.
It took 15 years of hard earned railroad service ( and maybe a winning smile) to get the privilege to climb up and see this old ( yet she can still do it) girl.
But selling tickets and ( clearing throat ) telling people where to go isn't so bad.
Train rides yep siree bob. That's just what I do.
It was one thing off the bucket list for me.
Wish I could show you the pictures ! You can google engine 3751 it's all over the Internet . She's a beauty. ( that was my Steve Irwin impression)

just checked her out. man, don't tell deb, but she is gorgeous beast.