Help me please.

I'm so sorry Evelyn. It hurts so much to have your heart broken by someone you felt was a friend. Add to that all the stress of school and trying to keep up with all of the demand it places on you, and I can totally understand why you feel overwhelmed.

Don't let this moment define you, there's a world of wonderful things still waiting for you to discover them.

What are you studying?

Evelyn:

I’m glad you decided to write.

I’m in the exact same boat.

First, nobody will come to your aid. Second, the person who started the rumor will never be punished.

Third, nobody will stand up to or question as to facts the person who started the rumor, or to the person who is spreading it.

Fourth, all of those people who start or continue the rumor will keep their jobs or their standing in the neighborhood/community.

Fifth, none of those involved will question what relationship (friend/enemy?) the person who started the rumor is to the subject of the rumor.

Sixth, no one will question any of the so called facts, and ask, “What evidence do we have here?” If it was a supposed wrongdoing or crime, was there a trial? No such questions will be asked.

about 8 years ago, a person on my street, who I had a problem with several years earlier, started a false rumor about me.

You say, “I am feeling very helpless and lost right now.”

You say, “But I have a low self-esteem, and coupled with social anxiety,”

That’s who these people pick on. If you were outgoing and brash, they wouldn’t pick on you. I’m basically the same way, in that I’m friendly enough, but not brash like some of them are.

As with you, the person who started the rumor, felt like I did him wrong. The fact that he was a psychopath who didn’t talk to anybody, but wanted to be the king of the neighborhood anyway, especially when he saw me walking and talking with people in front of his house.

You said, “Now, she is trying to spread gossips about me so that I will leave my workplace”

Some of these people want me to leave the neighborhood.

You said, “Everything that I have ranted to her, she is using it against me.“

I have a former so-called friend in the neighborhood who is being paid to find out data on me, and is telling the person who started the rumor what’s going on so I can be attacked.

You said, “I always do stupid things, trust the wrong people and make stupid mistakes. To those colleagues that misunderstand my behaviour as being rude, I can't explain...and I'm hurting.”

I feel the same way in that this so-called friend and his wife will pump me for data that can hurt me, and I end up answering a lot of the questions, like an idiot.

We are not stupid, we are sensitive. You are not helpless, you are sensitive. Actually, some people prefer that type of personality. That's a strong point, which some want you to think if a weakness. It's not. Realize it's a blessing.

We are not the ones who are at fault. They are, for starting the rumor.

I try not to succumb to their badness, but just go on about my way, defending myself if necessary, but not going to their level.

One day, you or your principal will change schools, and the situation will be over. So don’t worry about it.

Or, you can request to change schools, if that’s what’s best for you.

I want to stay in my neighborhood, is one problem. I’ve talked to this guy two or three times, but I need to talk to him again. I’ve got his number, so I need this additional conversation. I already know what I want to say.

What is it with this woman? Is she insecure, what is it? Something’s going on underneath. She’s not as strong as you think she is. She has a character flaw.

Who do people attack? Those who are strong, because they are jealous; those who are weak, because they are easier to defeat; and those in the middle, whenever there is a chance.

Think positive and think of your strong points: you're not like they are, and aren't we glad?

Hi,

Thanks for all your replies.
I am currently taking bachelor in Early Childhood (part time).
Working full time as an early childhood educator.

I shall be still and do nothing. But i am hurting and depressed. I cant explain my condition to my colleagues.
Im thinking of giving up my job and suspend my studies...and then take a long break to see the doctor and recuperate.

I already told my principal about how I felt.
it seemed she is very scared that i will tell other people what she had ranted to me.
Another teacher left the workplace telling me that she is cautious of the principal.

I am depending on God to fight the battles for me.

You said,

"Im thinking of giving up my job and suspend my studies...and then take a long break to see the doctor and recuperate."

I hate to see you give up he ghost, but you know your self and your situation better than I do.

I've just recently thought about leaving my neighborhood, but that has problems, too. Staying could be catastrophic, because these people play for keeps.

I'm trying to gage the situation minute by minute. I do want to talk to this guy this 3rd or 4th time to try to calm things down.

Wish me luck. And good luck to you. These things aren't nice.

Early childhood education? What do you say to your students when they get down on themselves? Bet you point out their strong points. Bet you tell them not to be so hard on themselves. Try it out on yourself.

My partner went through a horrible year working at her high school. Her teaching partner used to be as close as a brother but since becoming president of their union, he has turned into a real pain. He made false statements to their supervisor and my partner nearly broke under the pressure. They used to rant to each other, each knows about a lot of 'skeletons in the closet' and my partner just kept her mouth shut, nose to the grindstone shoulder to the wheel type stuff. Next year, thanks to her tenacity, she will be teaching alone!

Statements like 'always' and 'never' can be moderated by a skilled therapist. I think it would do you a world of good to speak with one. Besides, whatever you may learn from one will be very useful in your chosen profession!

Meanwhile, can you make a lateral move within the school system? Be away from this principal yet continue with your career?

I hope things improve for you. Keep posting and let us know how you are doing. You are among friends here.

Evelyn,

I can say that I know how you feel.

I also can say from experience, God does not fight our battles, God, leads us through our battles. Big difference there. Depending on belief and faith. We are not supposed to talk this so it ends here.

However, you do have some leverage here. The other persons fear of what you might do the the knowledge you have. This other person is a bully, that let the cat out of the bag.

You do not have to do a thing to them, their own mind will do it to them.

I suggest you take Myself's advice and use the "peacemaker" to settle this.

You will come out on top I believe , condivence will be renewed and you would have learned a good lessoned in politics.

If you do not win, you will be no worse off, than you are know.

Peace and strength
Trina