Posted 7/12/2016 6:28 PM (GMT 0)
MC:
Glad you reached out for help.
You've had 4 nervous breakdowns, I've had 3, so no matter what your rough past, we're about equal.
I learned something years ago when I came across a column which said to approach your problems wit ha positive attitude that you can solve them. I never thought about that in my life.
I thought a problem was always a problem, bad, and I was always who I was. So, how could you change any of that?
Well, in a way, you can't change any of that but you can change your attitude towards the problem. Whoa!
The column taught me how. It said, go into the problem with a positive attitude that you can solve it. And that can change the outcome of whether you solve the problem.
That was like science fiction to me. I can become Superman? Yeah.
From reading the col., I realized I had been going into problems with a neg. unconscious, which was double trouble because, first, I didn't see my neg. uncon., and second, I was dooming myself from the start, I was wanting to not solve the problem, which is what I had been taught since childhood.
I was taught problems are bad. That's true. But the chances of solving them can be good, especially if you have a positive attitude going into trying to solve the problem.
It was like an experiment. If a complete idiot like me with, yeah, with 3 nervous breakdowns, can get this formula working, why can't everybody?
So it was like an experiment. I was already convinced I could do it. The way she wrote the col., I knew I could do it. It hit every point of my brain. It wiped out decades of neg. brainwashing that I was a complete idiot. (Plus I had manic-depression.)
If I could pull this off, this was going to cool.
I told myself, post this col. on the bulletin board, and you next time you have problem, get it down off the bulletin board and read it, and don't even think about the problem. The problem is not the problem, the problem is your unconscious negative. Any fool could solve most of these problems but something is blocking you.
A few days later, my son comes in and says, "The car won't start. It's in the backyard," and walked out of the room.
My first thought was, wait till my wife comes home from work, and she'll solve it. As usual, I had no solutions, because why, because I'm an idiot.
Then I thought, get the col. down off the bulletin, because why? This is a problem, and the col. talks about how to solve problems. And I might have thought, well, yeah, but the col. doesn't know anything about how to get a car out of the backyard which has a small driveway.
Well, I know, but it might put you in the right frame of mind. For the first time in my life. Right. I got the col. down and put it on the bed and started to read it. By the 4th or 5th paragraph, I thought, "Bosewell's" (a garage with a small wrecker that would fit in our driveway, and we had used a couple of years before).
Wait a minute. I had thought of the answer and I wasn't even thinking about it. I was reading a col. on being positive when trying to solve problems.
But what had the col. done? It had taken the neg. out of my uncon. and allowed my con., which wanted to solve the problem, to be free to come up with a solution which any 5th grader could come up with.
So what was the problem? Was it the problem? No, it was neg. uncon. which had been taught me that solving problems made my parents feel bad for not being able to solve problems. So I was rewarded for being a failure. To survive, I had to fail.
That col. helped me to recognize what was going on, to unburden myself of that, for my benefit, not for my parents'.
Now, when I have a problem, I realize that first, I don't have to think about the problem, any fifth grader can solve most problems, I have to get the neg. out of my uncon.
So before thinking about the problem, I say, "Think positive, think positive, think positive..." trying to drive the neg. out of my uncon. which I can't see.
And the problem itself is usually very easy. I was the problem.