Having a rough night

Hi Sunnee, nice to have you here. I'm sorry your feeling so down and depressed. I don't think you were rambling at all. Thats what this site is for to try and help each other when we don't feel like ourselves or just when we don't feel good, period. Personally i think you need to do more than write in a journal, although that can be helpful. But if you continue to feel sad, maybe you should seek counseling or a Dr. I wish you all the best and I hope you feel better soon! Take Care of Youself!

I understand exactly what you are talking about. I went through almost the same sort of thing in relation to work. I was working for a great little startup company for a wonderful man. He was the CEO and there was a business owner as well. The owner had a huge ego and couldn't deal with the idea that the CEO knew more than he did so he fired the CEO. The company started to do a downhill slide in every way possible. At the time we had 2 kids starting college and I really needed a steady job. This is what was up for me. I began to have stress related symptoms, dreaded going to work, I was already struggling with the death of a close family friend and when the job thing went badly a depression hit me. I was trying to make an impossible situation work because it was at least a familiar situation. I finally realized that I had to get out. I hooked up with a career advisor and several job agencies and found a better place for me to be. It took a while for me to get a handle on the depression but I am once again med free. I know it is because I made changes that were supportive of me, my family and what we all needed.

Think about it. Do you need to make changes? Depression happens but it isn't always about what we have done or haven't done. Sometimes it is about what we need to do.