when you go to see the rheumatologist...

Is it just the first appointment you don't wear make-up for, or is it all of them?

Ta,

I.

Sorry, but I've never heard of it before either. I've been seeing my Rheumy for a year now. I don't wear alot of make up, but nothing was said about it. Maybe someone else knows something. Did your Rheumatologist office suggest no make up for your first appt.?

Margie

Well, that does make sense to me. I never thought about it in that way, but I guess it would be good for your first visit with him. All doctor's are different. I'd say go without or not much.

Hugs!!  Margie

I wouldn't think so. Unless the doctor asks I don't see any reason for it.

Some people believe that you shouldn't wear makeup because you should look as sick as you feel. If you go in with perfect hair and makeup, it's harder to claim that you are too fatigued to function or that your hands and arms hurt too much for you to cook dinner or work.

I would like to believe that a doctor, especially a rheumatologist, would realize that you probably took hours getting ready and will pay for it for days, but that's not always the way it works. Some docs, especially the ones that you have to see to get disability, will use your appearance against you. I have friends that have found comments about their hair and makeup in their records.

If you start doing your hair and makeup for later visits, some docs assume you are feeling better because you look better even if you say you are not.

On the other side, you can't go in looking too "raw" either. You'll be immediately judged as depressed, which is fine if you are but not so fine if you aren't.

I learned the above information from a disability advocate that spoke to us at a support group meeting. She told us about a woman that was turned down for disability because the doctor noted in her records that she must have spent hours to get her hair and makeup so perfect, he felt she was exaggerating her symptoms.

Interesting topic. On another hand, I say be yourself. For me, part of building trust with my GP is to represent myself exactly as I am at that moment in my life. Let me give you a for instance. I had a fantastic family doc in FL, he saw ME, the real deal each time. Because we were partners, we had agreed to be honest with each other. As I felt better and got stronger, he could see it in ALL of me. He needed encouragement, too :) He needed to know if he was on the right track with my treatment and progress, he wanted me to be stronger and not live a life of just despair and endurance. He cared about me and my positive progress meant alot to him. I guess what I am saying is be yourself- we wear lots of clues and its important for our docs to be able to evaluate us on many levels for an accurate treatment plan. Good luck!

I have one last thing to add, my hooosband hates when I do this [keep explaining] but this is a very important topic for us- makeup, nice clothes, pretty hair- wonderful things. Remember that once we have a trusting and respectful relationship with our docs, there is nothing we can do or NOT do that will hide whats going on with us. These are our docs- they know us, they know the difference between paint, pity, and progress. :) More of Sera's southern wits-dom. Be yourself- mask or no mask, who you are will always shine through. If a doc comments on the makeup, tell 'em that with your health challenge, these doc visits are the closest thing to a 'date' that you have had in years and you wanted to look good :) Keep your chin up, ladies and gents, and throw on that pink lipstick and blue eyeshadow if your inner vixen asks you to. Peace!

Sherrine, It sounds like you saw decent doctors that did their job and looked at the facts. I am happy for you. That's the way it should be for everyone.

Most of the people in my fibro group either are on disability or are trying to get it. It seems so arbitrary sometimes. I've had friends that are so very obviously disabled rejected more than once, and others, in better shape, get their disability the first time. I know there is more to it than appearance but it's something to keep in mind.

One of our local disability lawyers, considered one of the best in the area, advises his clients to keep the keep their hair style as simple as possible and skip the makeup before any hearings or dr. appointments. It's the advice that's given a lot in my town by attorneys, doctors and support groups. I don't know how true it is and where else it may apply but I heard the same thing 10 years ago on the other side of the country.

When Ivy asked, I just thought she had heard this advice too.

I don't worry about it, I'm a ponytail and mascara person on a good day or in a flare.