O/T Dogs

Well, now you will all know what I think about as I sit here unable to sleep because I am on fire.

My sons and children visited over the 4th of July.  My one son has a five year old, Ella and a three year old, Avery.  They are petrified of dogs and everyone in our family has at least one.  They stayed with my youngest son Joel, who had just bought a lab puppy.  The girls screamed at the sight of this little thing.  Either my son or DIL would pick them up and wait for someone to take the dog away.  Finally Joel's wife said "I am not locking my dog in a cage all week.  The girls have to get over it."

When they visited me, they wouldn't come in my house until I put my poor old crippled dog Dylan in the basement.  Avery was forever asking me if he could break through the cellar door.  I took her for a walk around the block and she saw a dog sleeping in the sun behind a fence.  She climbed me like a tree and I had to carry her home.  Ella asked me where Vesta was and I told her she had died.  "Oh, now I don't have to be afraid."

These girls have never been attacked, bitten or mauled by a dog.  My son says he doesn't know where their fear comes from but he is sure they will outgrow it.  I am sure this is why family visits are so short and far and few between.  Last year was even worse.  If Ella heard Vesta barking in the basement she would turn blue from fear.   Here's the kicker...I was talking to Avery on the phone the other night and she heard Dylan in the back ground barking at the UPS man.  She went nuts..over the phone!

My son is director of mental health for central NC...I can't believe he caters to this.  I am sure he wouldn't suggest enabling this to any of his clients.  I would like to say something...but what?

Oh well...just a midnight rant to my fibro friends.  I guess I'll see what's on the 'how to avoid paying taxes' channel.

Huggies

Donna

At that age a child's fear is learned. Either someone taught them to be terrified of dogs or, something has increased their fears in other areas.

Your son may be in denial.

I was terrified of dogs but I was an abused child. My father however, worked with me to get past the fear (my mother was the abuser). Once I found out that dogs were okay I loved them.

donnaeil

I've never seen a child afraid of a dog unless something happened to trigger it. That's sad. The parents really should consider working toward desensitizing them and working through the phobia; there are just too many dogs everywhere for them to go through life like this.

You guys have got me to thinking.  Before we got Vesta and Dylan, we had an 18 month old dog named Leslie.  My son would jog with her around the Army base in VA Beach.  One day he did not put on her choke collar, he took her on a busy street to get to the base, she slipped the collar and got hit by a truck.  He pulled her out of the middle of the street and she bit him badly...as it turns out she was in massive pain with a ruptured kidney, broken pelvis and severe internal bleed.  She died a few days later. Anyway, he has an obvious, nasty scar on his arm from the bite.  I am wondering if the girls have asked him what the scar is from and he told them.  It's a thought... and boy is this o/t!  So sorry but this has really been bothering me.

Huggies

Donna

Slowly desensitizing to the dogs is the best way to handle the fear. Precaution: when the children are around dogs and react with fear and the dogs are removed, that actually makes the fear worse. You may have to start with pictures of dogs. If the child can handle it, show a dog far away. Stay with the child around the dog that is far away until the child no longer shows fear. You slowly get closer and closer with the dog. You might have to do this with one child at a time.

My oldest was threatened by someone that he would sic the dog on her if she didn't behave and she was afraid of dogs from age 2 to 8. I didn't know any of these techniques. We got a dog of our own and she got over the fear. I can't remember how we did it - it has been a long long time since that happened.
Sue

It took me years and years to figure out why my Mom was afraid of dogs. She had dementia before she died and used to talk about when she was a girl growing up in a rural area. She talked as if it was present tense, which was really interestiing, because it was if I was there. One of her chores was to feed to dog team in the dog lot, and they were working dogs, not pets, so not socialized. She used to put the food down and run, scared to bits.

I don't have kids myself, but I get really upset if I hear parents making idle threats to their kids in public, in order to try and make them behave; it embarrasses me. I overheard one woman tell her child that 'that old lady over there will turn into a witch and eat you' if she didn't sit down and be quiet. The poor older lady was eating lunch with her daughter and had been smiling at them.