The "pleasure" of being disabled.....

I have not been here in a long time, and I'm very sick since Monday with a sore throat, body aches and mouth sores. I feel like crud really, so I don't know how this thread will turn out, but here I am.

I usually don't have any trouble on facebook with any of my friends, in fact, it's usually fun for me to be on there. But last night and this morning was a different story. One friend posted about mental hospitals that included adding different friend's names from fb - like: who drove you to end up in the hospital, who broke you out of the hospital....stuff like that. I have been hospitalized 15 times for depression. Normally this stuff doesn't bother me, but it did last night.

Then today I said I didn't make my husband's sandwich this morning because I was too sick, and one friend said she doesn't have the pleasure of waiting on her family hand and foot like I do since I don't work. Oh yes, having depression and fibromyalgia is a real pleasure.

We moved to a different house last week and I did way too much because I wanted to try and do my part - instead, I made myself very sick. I've been in bed since Monday afternoon, most of the time.

Am I being too touchy, or do people really have no feelings anymore? Tell me your thoughts.

As for the bit about the Facebook mental hospital thing, there are a pile of those going around.... who would help you rob a bank, commit a murder, who you do adult movies with.... lots of them. So don't let that one get to you.

As for your friend's comment - it was certainly in poor taste. But maybe she's been having a bad week, feeling under appreciated by her family or being taken advantage of by a freeloading coworker. Just remind her it is hard to "wait hand and foot" on anyone when you are feeling as though you'd be better off with your legs amputated (how I feel today)! But again, I doubt she is trying to be hurtful or judgemental. Stuff so easily gets misconstrued or written hastily on the internet that you have to give people the benefit of the doubt sometimes

Facebook sometimes depresses me. I have to take a break from it sometimes. One type of message I currently hate is "get well soon." I may feel a little better tomorrow, but I don't expect I will get all better like it's a little bit of sniffles.

Myjoy: moving will take it out of you. I just moved 2 weeks ago to another state and I am still exhausted! Sounds like you need some rest. I have seen those Facebook game/posts you are referring to. I think they are just stupid, so the best thing to do is to never participate in them or react.

I also think people are ignorant about fibromyalgia and don't know what to say, like the "Get well soon". Depending on your mood, you could even be the one to educate them about this and how, unfortunetly, we can't just "get well soon". I hope this week is better for you! Hugs. :)

I saw the same FB post today, and on a day when I'm dealing with an overwhelming amount of depression and working with my doctor for mental health treatment, it was tough for me to read, too. I know people don't mean any ill will in those posts, but the harsh reality is that depression is a very real and debilitating condition.

I once had someone say to me "well, at least I don't have to take happy pills" in reference to the antidepressants I was on. If they knew what it was like to fight depression, they would probably have a different take on things.

Sending a hug your way...

myjoy I understand comments getting to you, I have days when comments really bother me and I wonder what I have done to that person for them to make such a hatred remark. Usually I get over it because I do not hold things in very well anymore.

People just really don't have a clue. We are actually on a higher plane of knowledge & realization than they are, so keep that in mind & try to tolerate 'em

Hi Myjoy,

I can really relate to how your are feeling. I am not a FB fan. I tried it, and it was too much information for me. Being "friends" with people on there just seems so fake.

Anyway, I have friends who just assume because I do not work, that I don't have anything else to do. I have a friend who texts me all the time because she is bored at work. I do care about this person and value her friendship. There are days when I have to text her and say I am resting in order for her to stop. She is real good about it, but I sometimes resent this. She always says I hide my pain well. Like that means it's not there. What people don't understand about Fibro is that we have to go on living. So if you see me and I don't look sick doesn't mean that I am not, it just means I am doing the best I can at that time. I personally don't like get well soon, but what worse too, is hope you are feeling better. There have been times when I will say to my husband, I never feel better. Ever.

I have other friends who will call or text and ask me to lunch at the drop of a hat. It takes so much effort and energy for me to get presentable enough to go out of the house and so having someone say can you meet me in 45 min is just not going to happen. My husband although I know he tries hard not to think this way gets envious from time to time and will say things like; "you can do anything you want." Really? Cuz this is now what is true. He is envious of me because I am at home. I remember what that feels like the daily grind - going to work when one wishes they could stay home. I think people just don't realize when you get your wish it may not be as wonderful as you think. Your friends comment was rude. But, it is based on her experience with the world and not yours. I am wondering if she has some sorta envy going there too. I often tell my friends to appreciate their jobs and the ability they have work without being ill. To appreciate it and be thankful they can. I worked full time with Fibro for a couple of years until I fell flat on my face. I am 50 and I have been off work 2 years. I often wonder if Fibro gets harder as we age too. I know its hard. Being able to appreciate your job whether its your dream job or not is something I think a lot of people take for granted. I know I did, even though I loved my job. I still miss it terribly and if I could trade places with someone who has a job and they have my illness I would do it in a heartbeat. Let them be sick 24/7 for a few years and ask them how they like their luxury now. I hope you are feeling better today.