Venting and flaring

The past few days have seen my fibro flaring after a few months of minimal symptoms, I am one of the lucky ones, I work full-time and run a household of 5 adults, and have been able to control my symptoms with medication. Yes I am in pain all day and always stiff but I am able to carry on, however for some unknown reason my fibro has decided to play up.

I am under some pressure at work due to job uncertainty but I have been handling that quite well, well so I thought, but to add to everything my mum rang this evening to TELL me what I had to make for my grandmothers birthday. The other members of the family have made all the arrangements for this party to suit themselves, no one took into consideration that DH and I were going away that weekend. Then the phone call that came tonight was the icing on the cake. Mum assumed that if we were going to the party we wouldn't be going away, where as we had decided to go away as planned and come back early. So then I get the guilt trip laid on me by my mother. I have tried to explain to her about my fibro and other issues but she has chosen not to remember or understand. I am the only one of the "party food makers" who works full time and the only one with medical issues (well except for mum who is 79). I tried to negotiate to do something easier, like dips and biscuits and vege etc but she is doing that, so I told her I would ring her back and let her know what I would do.

Sorry for venting, I know nobody has the answers but at least I know you guys understand.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with mom on top of everything else. This is, at the very least, a case of not physically being able to do what you're asked (told) to do, and I hope you'll be able to stand firm on that. Good luck, and I hope the pain eases soon!

I do agree with everyone here it is a shame to be flaring period but to have family not back off a bit is wrong. Just tell your mom what you can bring and she will have to adjust her plan. I found out when I said no to my family they went into shock for awhile but now respect my boundaries much better.

Because I am the person in the family who cooks, I often felt at events and holidays that my skills were expected. After one disastrous Christmas, where I was exhausted and stupid, and the meal was poor by most standards, my brother, at the urging of my sis-in-law I believe, began to schedule special meals at restaurants. I do still like to cook for everyone, but now it becomes more about choice rather than expectations.