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Posted 10/4/2012 3:27 AM (GMT 0)
I am so need of prayers right now. My body has been in so much pain I have gone all summer without a break from it and the pain is so bad right now I am in tears. I don't know what to do with myself, my bed hurts me everywhere I lay, I am at my breaking point right now and don't know how much more I can take. I ask god everyday if I can live long enough to take care of my mother and my dogs then he can take me any time I am ready. Don't worry I am not suicidal just in a extreme amount of pain in every part of my body and I am at my breaking point. I have had fibro I believe all my life but diagnosed since 1991 and this past 5 years I have gotten so bad with this condition that twenty years ago I would have never imagine that I would be in this much pain.

When I started with FM the pain was in my neck and back but now everything is effected my hands, feet, back, legs, eyes, head, everything hurts. Its bad when you have to go in a store and you know you need something else and its on the other side of the store and you hurt so bad that you decide to leave instead of going that extra mile. Today, that is what happened at Target and then with the exhaustion and the pain when I went to walk out the store I stopped at the door thinking it would open on its own then when it did not thought darn it now I have to push it too.

Does anybody else get this bad where your at your breaking point and all you can do is cry, its not that I feel sorry for myself its just the pain is so intense and for so long it finally wears me down.
Posted 10/4/2012 4:05 AM (GMT 0)
That's the time when I sit down for some "me time". I get in a comfortable place with my favorite treat, turn on the TV, and just veg out.
If I'm hurting I cry...scream...pray...vent...and just give myself a pity party. Then I breath deep and try to refocus myself.

Sometimes I just listen to my favorite music. I find waltzes are good motivators.
Posted 10/4/2012 5:28 AM (GMT 0)

Barbara, I'm so sorry to hear about what you're dealing with--that just stinks!!   I am saying a prayer for you, and I've been in your shoes with the unrelenting pain.  My fibro is not as bad as some here, but I have RA, too, so I know what that level of pain is like.

Are you on any medications?  If not, maybe you could try something to help with the pain.  I wish I had other answers for you, but I hope it helps a little when I say that I understand.

Please keep writing and sharing your thoughts and feelings, as sometimes that's the only thing that helps is to share with others who understand.  God Bless you!!

Posted 10/4/2012 7:14 AM (GMT 0)
Barbara- I have been where you are before. Pain can push your buttons. I don't tolerate pain very well. It has been a long time since I have had a real bad day. It sounds like you might need some adjustment on meds. I am not sure if you take any for pain. I take subutex and it has controlled my pain very well. The depression has lifted. It might be one of those days that you pull the covers over your head and go back to sleep. Are you under a lot of stress? I hope you have a better day tomorrow! May God touch you.
Posted 10/4/2012 8:45 AM (GMT 0)
Barbara, I understand your pain, exhaustion and frustration. Between the Fibro and spinal surgeries, nerve damage, I have been in constant paint and nearly bed ridden for the last three years. Yes, have a good cry. It is O.K. to feel what you feel. But when you are done greiving over yourself, it is time to make your Rheumatologist aware that you need help in regards to managing pain. Since you are taking care of your mother, you could also be suffering a little caregiver burnout and it would not hurt to talk to a Psychotherapist in dealing with that as well as chronic pain. There are free brochures that can be emailed to you on dealing with pain at http://www.afstore.org/Products-By-Type/Pain_6

 Also, two excellent recources for pain management are www.arthritis.org and www.arthritistoday.org

Please read the first post here on the Healing Well Fibromyalgia forum: Fibromyalgia 101. Not just read it, but do it. You have probably not been doing enough exersize to keep your heart strong enough, thus you tired at Target. So important to keep moving - not enough to hurt you - but use it or lose it.  Cheer up and hugs to you. Time to grow spiritually, emotionally and learn coping skills you will need the rest of your life. Deliberately create joy into your life every day. My prayers are with you on our journey.

Posted 10/4/2012 10:03 AM (GMT 0)
Barbara, I have been there! That's when I went and got meds. I would sit in the living room and have to pee and think "sigh it hurts too much and the bathroom is too far away", and would wait till I couldn't anymore to finally go to the bathroom. Mind you wasn't very far from the bathroom. When I finally went sitting felt like needles poking me, then after using the bathroom I would walk three feet to my bed and lay down for an hour before I went back to the family room.

Or we would be out doing errands and hubby to be would say what's left after one or two errands and I would say just please take me home I can't do any more. And the whole way home I was so miserable I would think "Under that tree looks so comfortable! I just want to stop riding and just lay there for a little while". And once we got home I would sleep for hours.

At that point we knew at 35 yrs old, I had to do something ! I have bad days on my meds, but none to that extent, and very few close to that. My family and close friends worship my meds these days :-) I hope you feel better soon!
Posted 10/4/2012 11:09 AM (GMT 0)
Yes, I can sure relate, and be assured I'm praying for you.

One thing I've found is that when my pain is at my worst and I think I can't take much more, it's almost always the time that things start to get somewhat better. I don't know why that is, but I have seen it often. Hang in there and God bless you. Please try to take some time for yourself--pick up a good book, watch a funny movie, give yourself a manicure, have a good friend come and see you if you can't go see her, etc.. And remember we are here for you!
Posted 10/4/2012 12:32 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you everyone for the support that is just what I needed, I managed to get a couple hours of sleep last night waking up stiff as usual. My problem is I have no resources to go to. I do not have insurance because of my "preexisting condition" but in December I do qualify for Medicare but once you sign up it won't take affect until July, so I have at least July to try and find a doctor willing to help me.

I have tried getting pain meds from my current doctor in the past for these bad flare ups and he told me he doesn't give pain meds to FM patients, now I do have tramodal but it does not seem to work on me and I take the Ativan at night to try and relax my body to sleep and that is not working. I also purchased a new mattress and I think I choose a to firm one so I have another coming Next Wednesday at a hefty fee so hopefully that will get me feeling some better. Thanks for the support! It really helps.
Posted 10/4/2012 6:56 PM (GMT 0)
Barbara, I purchased a topper, it lays on top of the mattress. There are three different ones, firm, moderate and slight. I swear by it. My nights have become so much better, I can sleep and not have the terrible pain as before, yes I have some bad nights but it has really helped. Now ofcourse I have sleep apnea! thats a whole different story! lol
Posted 10/4/2012 11:13 PM (GMT 0)
Sorry to hear you are hurting so much lately:(

I don't have any insurance either...Do you have a muscle relaxer to take? I didn't see that listed...

I take generic Flexeril and it works very well and is only $8 at Walmart/Sam's club for 60 pills which last me a few months as I only take them when I get really bad spasms.

This is where an opiate or even Tramadol doesn't work as well as an actual muscle relaxer. So even a GP or any Dr. you see could prescribe one of these. And without insurance, a Dr. will usually discount their fee so that an appt. may cost $75 but it would be worth it. You must already have a Dr. that prescribes the Tramadol and Ativan, so they could just call in the Flexeril for you without an appt. if they have seen you in the last months.


The other muscle relaxers besides Flexeril are Robaxin, Skelaxin, Baclofen, or Zanaflex. You can always see if your Dr. has samples of any of them as well.

Have you tried Melatonin for sleep? I do my daily exercise at night about 3 and 1/2 hours before bed. I go on my nightly walk with my dog and listen to a book that is downloaded on my phone. Not only does this help with not being so stiff...it is a nice leisurely walk (1.2 miles) that also helps me get more tired to actually sleep better.

And I know you said your mattress you just returned was too firm....but I am hoping that you took some time to lay down on this new one so that you can tell whether it's going to be comfortable...Does this new one have a no fee return policy?

As Sharonf mentioned...instead of a new mattress...I also bought a mattress topper from Sam's club. It is 3 inches thick and was only $130. It is Tempurpedic like material so I get the firmness from my actual bed, but the absolute comfort of the topper.

It has made a huge difference in my pain levels as I also suffer from bursitis from time to time. I also have a contoured pillow, a leg and arm pillow so that when I sleep on each side my back is perfectly aligned. I have all the spine issues in addition to Fibro.

I've also learned that what I eat also affects my energy/fatigue levels. I moved to eating all organic two years ago and it's made a pretty big difference.

I also drink 12-14 glasses of water each day. I only have one cup of coffee in the morning and then water the rest of the day. People don't realize how even a small amount of dehydration can cause muscle aches as well as fatigue.

I do AM/PM yoga that is gentle but really helps.

It's really about trying to keep moving as much as possible during the day to not get so stiff and sore....

I'm certainly sending you some hugs and hope that this flare settles down soon..
Posted 10/4/2012 11:25 PM (GMT 0)
You need to find a Dr that will give you meds for FM!
Posted 10/4/2012 11:35 PM (GMT 0)
Barbara, you could have something besides fibro going on, too. That happened to me last winter. I had excessive pain and raw nerve pain so I went to a board certified rheumatologist and found out I had ankylosing spondylitis. Believe it or not, ibuprofen and a muscle relaxer called Robaxin made a significant difference. Not everything is caused by fibro. But no matter what, please get checked out.

Sherrine
Posted 10/5/2012 3:07 AM (GMT 0)

Snowbunny21 said...
Sorry to hear you are hurting so much lately:(

I don't have any insurance either...Do you have a muscle relaxer to take? I didn't see that listed...

I take generic Flexeril and it works very well and is only $8 at Walmart/Sam's club for 60 pills which last me a few months as I only take them when I get really bad spasms.

This is where an opiate or even Tramadol doesn't work as well as an actual muscle relaxer. So even a GP or any Dr. you see could prescribe one of these. And without insurance, a Dr. will usually discount their fee so that an appt. may cost $75 but it would be worth it. You must already have a Dr. that prescribes the Tramadol and Ativan, so they could just call in the Flexeril for you without an appt. if they have seen you in the last months.


The other muscle relaxers besides Flexeril are Robaxin, Skelaxin, Baclofen, or Zanaflex. You can always see if your Dr. has samples of any of them as well.

Have you tried Melatonin for sleep? I do my daily exercise at night about 3 and 1/2 hours before bed. I go on my nightly walk with my dog and listen to a book that is downloaded on my phone. Not only does this help with not being so stiff...it is a nice leisurely walk (1.2 miles) that also helps me get more tired to actually sleep better.

And I know you said your mattress you just returned was too firm....but I am hoping that you took some time to lay down on this new one so that you can tell whether it's going to be comfortable...Does this new one have a no fee return policy?

As Sharonf mentioned...instead of a new mattress...I also bought a mattress topper from Sam's club. It is 3 inches thick and was only $130. It is Tempurpedic like material so I get the firmness from my actual bed, but the absolute comfort of the topper.

It has made a huge difference in my pain levels as I also suffer from bursitis from time to time. I also have a contoured pillow, a leg and arm pillow so that when I sleep on each side my back is perfectly aligned. I have all the spine issues in addition to Fibro.

I've also learned that what I eat also affects my energy/fatigue levels. I moved to eating all organic two years ago and it's made a pretty big difference.

I also drink 12-14 glasses of water each day. I only have one cup of coffee in the morning and then water the rest of the day. People don't realize how even a small amount of dehydration can cause muscle aches as well as fatigue.

I do AM/PM yoga that is gentle but really helps.

It's really about trying to keep moving as much as possible during the day to not get so stiff and sore....

I'm certainly sending you some hugs and hope that this flare settles down soon..

Hi SB, I am doing a little better tonight still in severe pain, when it goes on for so long which I had not had a break since beginning of summer it starts to break me. I do have a Dr. I don't care for him though (nobody does that goes to him) so I need to find another, actually there was a PA in the same office that I use to see before being begged to see this doctor, my mother sees him and he is absolutely wonderful, I need to figure out how to go about switching back to him. I remember trying flexirel when I was younger and it kinda made me feel sleepy but that may be an option to getting better sleep at night.

I do drink a ton of coffee which probably does not help our condition it is such a bad habit but lately I drink a lot of water as well. I appreciate the thoughts and hugs this has been a really trying time for me I never thought I would get this bad I knew bad but this is really bad. One thing this condition has led me closer to my family, I have lost most friends for they don't understand and I care for my elderly mother who I went through a stressful time in April with open heart surgery (which really took its toll on me) so I have become closer to her recently and as of lately she has become my caregiver. lol
Posted 10/5/2012 3:13 AM (GMT 0)

Sherrine said...
Barbara, you could have something besides fibro going on, too. That happened to me last winter. I had excessive pain and raw nerve pain so I went to a board certified rheumatologist and found out I had ankylosing spondylitis. Believe it or not, ibuprofen and a muscle relaxer called Robaxin made a significant difference. Not everything is caused by fibro. But no matter what, please get checked out.

Sherrine

I often wonder if it is something else that is going on too, unfortunately I have one of those Dr.'s that don't care and does not do anything for me. I need to find a way to change really soon. I will check into the Robaxin also and see how expensive it is. This pain does seem more severe than the fibro I have had for many years which leads me to think if there is something else going on.
Posted 10/5/2012 3:50 PM (GMT 0)
Barbara, the Robaxin is a generic so it's quite inexpensive.  I used this product back in the early 1980's so it's been around a long time. 

 

Yes, do find a doctor that treats fibro patients and also get a board certified one.  My rheumy is both. 

 

I've had fibro for 25 years and last fall I started getting worse and worse until I couldn't function.  Just trying to walk to the bathroom had tears streaming down my cheeks.  That's when I went ti a rheumatologist for the first time.  Many tests and x-rays were taken and then I got that diagnosis.  I still have fibro but have AS on top of it.  So you could easily have something else going on now, too.  Fibro isn't supposed to be a progressive illness so that's what prompted me to get checked out again. 

 

Let us know what you find out because we really do care about you

 

Sherrine

Posted 10/5/2012 4:21 PM (GMT 0)
Barbara, I'm so sorry for your pain. I do understand how bad pain can get. You've recieved some great advice...I also use a muscle relaxer and it does help.

Soaking in the tub while doing deep breathing and meditation helps me. I use visualization and it helps transport me to a place where I find comfort. Doing deep breathing exercise during the day help alleviate my stress. I can feel the tension melt away. Stress can make my muscles tie up in knots and I hurt all the more. Taking time when I feel myself tensing up to relax has helped me. It has become an important routine and has helped lessen my pain.

Wishing you wonderful pain relief :)

Hugs, Robin
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