Had a pretty rough day today. I knew it was going to be tough just because there was a lot on the schedule, but knowing and experiencing ate 2 different things. I woke up feeling about
normal, at least as normal as I've ever been since being diagnosed in January, which is about
a 6 on the 0-10 pain scale.
I left the house around 7 am and got home around 3:30 pm after riding in the car ~ 3 hrs total and sitting in waiting rooms for about 3 hrs. Praise God my husband was with me to drive. By 11:00 my pain was on the rise and by 2:30 it almost had me in tears.
But as we were headed home I heard a song on the radio, Stronger by Mandisa. If you listen to Christian Contemporary music, you're probably familiar with it. But if you don't, here's a snippet of the lyrics that really struck a chord in me:
"When the waves are taking you under
Hold on just a little bit longer
He knows that this is gonna make you stronger, stronger
The pain ain't gonna last forever
And things can only get better
Believe me
This is gonna make you stronger
Gonna make you stronger, stronger, stronger
Believe me, this is gonna make you ... Try and do the best you can
Hold on and let Him hold your hand
And go on and fall into the arms of Jesus
Oh, lift your head it's gonna end
God's right there
Even when you just can't feel Him
I promise you that He still cares 'Cause if He started this work in your life
He will be faithful to complete it
If only you believe it
He knows how much it hurts
And I'm sure that He's gonna help you get through this" By the time the song was over, I had tears running down my face, but the pain had eased somewhat. I'm still in a lot of pain tonight, even after using our massaging chair and a warm bath with Epsom salts, but mentally I'm in a much better place. I don't want to proselytize, but when friends at church ask me how I stay so positive through this, my answer is that I know God has a plan, and I know that plan is good. I really don't understand how my situation fits into it, but I know it does somehow. And the thing is, it's true, I really do mean it. No matter how bad the day gets, I know He's in control. Sometimes I just need something like this song to remind me. Just wanted to share. Have a blessed day!Mari