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Posted 10/26/2008 5:32 PM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone. I haven't been on in a while, and I apologize. Recently, when I get online, I check my e-mail and that is about it, because with the recently colder weather, typing has become harder for me to do.

Here is what is going on with me. about two weeks or so ago, I was officially diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Yay for me, right? (sarcasm) Things have been pretty hard. I recently changed anti-depressants, so I am on Cymbalta instead of Zoloft. It seems to be working okay, but I was told by the rheumetologis that I saw that I would need to lower my Trazodone in order to take the higher dosage of Cymbalta that I was told to take. So, instead of 150mg of Trazodone, I am taking 75mg. This has been really hard on me. It is really affecting my sleep, which is affecting the rest of my days. I find it so overwhelming to see my house a mess and not feel like I can clean it. Today, I am going to try to at least get a few chores done so that I don't feel completely useless like I normally do.

Our main car broke down today, and I don't know when we will be able to get the part for it. We have another car, but someone syphoned the gas out of it a while ago, so now we are having a hard time getting it to run again. This is all really really stressing me out. We HAVE to have a vehicle. So many things are overwhelming me right now, and I just wish I could curl up and not get up. I wish that none of these problems were a reality.

I am not really sure what to do about all of this. And I don't know how to help my husband. I can tell he is having a very hard time coping with all of this because he doesn't have a job and he does most of the housework, plus taking care of our one year old child. He is really understanding and sweet, but I can tell that this is all taking a toll on him and I don't know what to do about it. I don't know how to push past the pain and fatigue and do things that I need to be doing.

I just feel so helpless and so useless and so stressed. I feel worn down all the time, and I feel like I am going to collapse all the time. I just don't know what to do. I need some advice. Please. Someone help me.

Posted 10/26/2008 6:07 PM (GMT 0)
I'm going through similar situation right now with my doctor messing with my script. I've been sick for over two months from it, and I'm finding it difficult to do anything right now (I have ocd about cleaning too, and it is bad when you can't get it done). . . Just try not to feel worthless, because there are some situation that are beyond your control, and there is nothing you can do about it. . . Putting yourself down will not help. . . You just need to have faith that things will come around. . . . At least you have a wonderful husband to help and are not all alone. You will be in my prayers. Good luck to you ;)

Sam
Posted 10/26/2008 6:53 PM (GMT 0)

Sam,

I appreciate your sympathies. Things seem pretty hopeless right now. Neither of our cars are running. It is going to cost a lot of money that we don't have to fix either of them. Everything seems like it is falling apart. I just want to get out for a while, try to think. But unless I feel like walking a long way, I can't get out. Part of me wants to get drunk, just to forget about my problems, and I am not the kind of person who does that. I feel trapped...trapped in my illness, trapped with finances, trapped in the house...I just feel so completely trapped.

Nothing seems to be going right. And it is so hard not to fall into a deep depression over it. I want to take a nap, but that still means that I would be in the house. I don't want to be in the house right now. I feel kind of claustrophobic with everything that is going on.

Anyways. Thanks for your sympathies.

Posted 10/26/2008 7:08 PM (GMT 0)
I hope the change of meds level out soon. Read what you wrote in your signature about God wrapping His arms around you. Sometimes faith is all we have to fall back on to get us through. I pray that you will get the car situation under control. It is a very tough time for so many financially. Do you get disability??? Is there anyone that can help you with the baby so your DH can get a job???

 

Girls I know it's hard to change the way you keep house, I'm a former OCD perfectionist when it comes to house cleaning. My DH use to say I was the only woman he knew that cleaned a clean house. It took me a long time to overcome it but I did and now I see how silly it was to spend so much time on my house. Actually, I think my DH rather enjoys that I'm not so picky we both seem to be more relaxed in our home. That is something I could never do before was relax if everything wasn't perfect. Don't torture yourselves over your house.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

Posted 10/26/2008 11:31 PM (GMT 0)
I know that everything seems so difficult for you and your husband right now, but give yourself permission to take life one day at a time. I think that you are adding more stress by worrying over it so try not to worry so much. Allow yourself to spend some time in bed and the rest will come around when it needs to. But walking is something that you mentioned and that would be good for you. It gives you energy and lets you feel good about yourself. If you do brisk walking it releases endorphines into your system and you feel pretty good. I would take that walk, it doesn't have to be a long one, only if you go for five minutes at a time at first. You will be glad that you did. Start slowly. Don't over do it, then start doing a little bit in your house each day. Eventually you will catch up and you will feel better about that too.

I hope that you are feeling better.

Hugs, Karen
Posted 10/27/2008 6:44 AM (GMT 0)
Hey- I am really feeling your pain right now. I can understand what you are going through, so many of us here can. However, this is not about me, but about you. I want to tell you that I was exactly where you are, about 5 years ago, classic story of too many doctors, too few answers. I somehow found what I needed inside myself to turn it all around. The reason I am telling you this is because I know you can do it, too. You have gotten some great advice so far. Today is Monday. Think about one thing you would like to do on Tuesday, like wash your hair, or unload the dishwasher. I am not kidding, this probably is laughable :) but its what I did. ONE thing. Each day. Make a choice today about tomorrow. Do that for a few days, see how it feels. Don't start with anything really big or demanding, this will enable you to get your choice done and over a very slight amount of days things around you will look and feel better. I know its wacky, but it works. Don't plan ahead- just for the next day. about your husband and this tension and fear you are carrying around- consider talking with him one night at dinner, maybe turn off the TV and just open the conversation- he may need an excuse to vent but doesn't feel like he can- maybe he even feels that you won't understand his feelings, and you can tell him that. Each of you have unique take on your lives together, but the plus is that you ARE doing it together. Thank him, ask him if he has any expectations of you that you don't know, and talk out how to make a flexible plan on how to carry on during these challenges. Let us know tomorrow how you are. Keep your chin up and your eyes on the prize. Peace!
Posted 10/27/2008 7:07 AM (GMT 0)
For your sleeping problems, if you can get some Melatonin, it might help.
and vitamin d might help some fibro pain.
as for chores, like the others said, take it one chore a day and hey Sera Smiles, it's not silly
it's actually quite good advise, thanks.......
The hardest chore for me is dusting as I'm also very allergic to dust and it sets off my asthma, so
sometimes my hubby helps with that otherwise it gets done when it gets done.
Sure hope this helps you out some...
We all care about you so never think your alone, okay.
Lots of soft hugz and prayers for you.
Keep us posted, Please.......
Posted 10/28/2008 2:57 PM (GMT 0)
You got some great advise, I am also going through the same thing I have five children and a great husband like yours . I would say take one day at a time, rest when you can and taking a walk even a short walk will help clear your head . I am only a new member but from reading the replays you received shows people really care and want to help. I hope you feel a bit better and remember sharing how you are feeling with others can ease the pain you are going through. KHALIN,
Posted 10/30/2008 12:00 PM (GMT 0)

The good news is that now we have cars. We were able to get the part we needed for our main car, so it is fixed, which takes a lot of stress away. And I am trying to learn how to take things one chore at a time. My problem is that when I have a good day, I tend to accidentally overdo it. The problem is that I am way behind on chores, which makes things stressful. Once everything is caught up on, it is all a matter of staying on top of it, which isn't nearly as hard. My husband was so sweet yesterday. He did the dishes for me, which is such a big deal because it is so painful for me to them. Because I have to stand up to do them, which kills my back and legs. I know that once things are all caught up on then I will feel better about it, and I will try to stay on top of it so that it doesn't get so bad again.

Thank you all so much for your comfort and advice. I love this forum because people here actually understand exactly how I feel. So I thank you all for that. For all the advice you have every given me, and for simply being here to listen when I need people to talk to.

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