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Posted 1/6/2009 5:52 PM (GMT 0)
Call it motivation, inspiration or whatever I don't have any. Yesterday the holidays were officially over and time to get to the to do list. I did do a little laundry, paid some bills and ran a few errands but ended up at Walmart I think so I didn't have to come home and face the LIST.

 

I use to be a self driven perfectionist that didn't need motivation I ran on auto pilot everyday and got up and did whatever needed to be done without thinking about it. I don't know if it is the lack of energy and I know when I start a project the chances of me running out of energy before it is completed keeps me from starting things cause I would end up with a worse mess in the house. A lot of my list is cleaning out every drawer and cabinet in the house and that can be done in one day each. Is it pain, I'm still having to baby the rib til it heals and I know how little it takes to make my hands hurt with the arthritis and fibro together. Don't know if more anti-depressants would help or not, don't really want to be on more.

 

This is the first time in my life I have had no motivation. I told Ken yesterday maybe I need to buy something new for the house and that might inspire me to change things around and clean. I use to always have new ideas for decorating and now, nothing. I want to clean and do some painting but just don't have the drive to do it. Maybe I have some kind of mental block going on that I need to analyze.

 

Anyway, thanks for reading and if anyone has any tips on how to get motivated let me know before the health department comes.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

Posted 1/6/2009 6:38 PM (GMT 0)
Oh Marlee! I have no tips, but I certainly know how you feel! I too was an overachiever, never needing anyone to motivate me. I use to get up at 4:45 every week day, to go workout at the gym for 75 minutes and then put in a full 8 hours at the office, come home and walk my dogs two miles and then take care of the kids and house. Now, just looking at "the list" makes me tired. You know, even though we talk about our lack of energy and pain, I wonder if we really understand or maybe we simply don't want to really admit to it? It's so hard for people with our personality types, in my opinion, to accept the change from fibro. I was diagnosed over 20 years ago, so it certainly isn't anything new for me. Sorry for rambling, I really just waned you to know you are not alone in this.
You know, the other thing may just be the weather, not affecting the fibro, but winter in general. We are not getting any younger and these winters in Illinois are getting rough, aren't they? We haven't had a winter like this one in years, at least in this part of Illinois. We go days without sunshine and I think that does affect my mood.
I hope you find the motivation to attack some of your todo list...be well,
Miriam
Posted 1/6/2009 6:44 PM (GMT 0)
Hugs Marlee,
Sorry to hear your down today. I can relate to not being motivated. You are Not alone Maybe you need to rest and regroup with yourself for a couple more days to get some of those projects done. I know how fustrating it is to get up (for me the weekend) and want to hammer out chores or get all the shopping done in one trip but don't feel like putting the effort into it. But hey, you got laundry and shopping done in the same day, I can't do that. It's got to be one or the other.

Maybe playing your favorite music while going through one the drawers or cabinets that need some freshing up. How about a little trip online or through the craft store to get tempted to do some crafty projects.

Soft Hugs,
Lori
Posted 1/6/2009 7:02 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Marlee,

 

I'm in the same boat here.  My living room is a major disaster,forget about cleaning drawers here as there is a mountain of ornament boxs that still havent been put away since taking down the tree.  See,I got to take all the ornaments off the tree and box them up as well as all the lights and hubby drug the tree outside somewhere and vacuumed all the pine needles up.  He also took down all the outdoor lights and there they sit in a pile among piles.  In order to put all this stuff away I have to go into the closet under the stairs and drag out all the halloween and easter stuff so the xmas stuff can be put in the back as we rotate the decorations out.  This of course also involves me wacking my head numerous times on the underside of the stairs because I keep forgetting to duck lol.

 

I am still black and blue from the fall I took over a week ago and very sore so maybe pain is whats zapping my motivation since all that bending and lifting boxes isnt going to make me feel any better.  I know the cold dark days are surely playing a part in all of this.  I had way more energy during the spring and summer.  I was fixing my hair and wearing makeup daily and now I look like a complete frump.  Its like it takes all my energy to just survive from one day to the next and having to leave the house to walk around doing errands in all this rain and snow and slush makes me feel like the walking dead.  No doubt about my pain is way up in the cold weather.  I dont know how ppl who live in really cold areas make it,I would have to move.  Plus I had grandkids here for the last 8 days.  We sent one home and swapped out another before their winter break was done but the kids were actually pretty good specially after my 8 yr old grandson discovered pinball on my computer lol, he was begging to play that and in an apartment there isnt much to do after board games and books.  But with a dumping of more snow we did go walking in it while it was snowing and made a nice snowman and then had a rip roaring snowball fight before I collapsed.

 

I hope you get some of your motivation back soon Marlee, you and me and probably tons of other fibrmites out there.

 

Soft Hugs,

Karen

Posted 1/6/2009 7:22 PM (GMT 0)
marlee,

you know, you might be on to something with the buying something new idea. for several months i was in a state just as you described-absolutely no ambition to do anything and my house was really showing it-but then last friday my in-laws brought over their dining room table (they never use it and our little kitchen table was just too small to fit everyone comfortably) and that started a total chain reaction. first we got the kitchen organized to make room for the new table, then that led us to rearranging the entire living room (ok-my husband did all of the rearranging-i just stood back and told him where to put things lol) and that led me to pick up my bedroom and even break down and go out and buy a new comforter (we've needed one for ages ever since our dog ripped a hole in our old one) all of this has lead me to slowly start organizing drawers and whatnot. i haven't gotten everything done since i move pretty slow, obviously, but just that one little change really set off a lot of different changes that were definitely for the better. so maybe something like that might help you, too?

(granted, i am looking around my house and seeing it's a mess again, but in my defense my youngest was home all day because his preschool was closed due to a busted pipe and man-he's like a little miniature redheaded tornado!)

anyway-i do know how you feel, though, and really hope you start feeling a bit better soon!
Posted 1/6/2009 8:08 PM (GMT 0)

Hey there Marlee & Friends!!!

I call it a case of the Januaries!! Basically ... ppl are whopped (sp?) from the holidays and the year before. Often times we just over do it during the holiday season and the can be well... anticlamatic.  Then we have a tendency to sit back and think about the previous year around New Years and it's exhausting!!   

Anyway, it happens to me every stinkin' January.  I have NO energy.  Just feel like I'd like to hibernate.  Maybe is SAD?!  I don't know.

I used to be hyper-energenic, worked 50-70 hours a week, volunteered, was constantly on the run.  Now, just 8 weeks later, not so much.  That lifestyle got me to where I am today.. unemployed (by choice) and completely unmotivated. EXHAUSTED!!!  And still nursing a lot of wounds from my complete and total meltdown. rolleyes

I agree with my neighbor, Danielle, getting something new or rearranging the furniture is motivating.   Buying something new isn't an option for me.. but if you can afford it, maybe just a little something might make a difference.

When it comes to the dreaded list... I try this little trick (not sayin' it always works.. but it's worth a try).  I try to break it up... Like - Tues.- Clean out 4 drawers - Wed. - Clean out 4 cabinettes - Thurs. etc..............  Sometime we overwhelm ourselves by looking at the BIG BAD LIST.. a smaller list might help.

I'm sure your rib pain isn't helping. 

OK... there's my 2 cents. 

warm hugs,

Posted 1/6/2009 8:18 PM (GMT 0)

Oh I can totally relate.  I got up this morning completely determined to get this place in order.  The artifical tree has been sitting here with no ornaments on it for a week.  I asked my husband to put it down stairs and to REALLY vaccum the rug with the big vacuum cleaner...I have been using one of those Shark cordless sweepers for months because I just can't push that heavy big thing any more. He agreed...he knows I can't use the vacuum anymore and we only have one rug in this house...the other floors are hardwood so it's not a  big job.  Anyway, he decided to remove all the 'pre-lit' lights on the stupid tree because none of them work.  They are screwed and welded into the branches.  I said forget it...I just throw some loose strands of lights around the tree and it looks fine.  NO...he wants to do this.  That was at ten o'clock this morning.  It is now three. He is half way done, there are faux needles EVERYWHERE, he is saving the bulbs he pulled for a 'Christmas Bulb Emergency' and they are lined up on every flat surface.  Every ounce of motivation I have is zapped...as I feel like crap by this time every afternoon. 

We have two large dogs and for those of you with animals, there is no describing the dog hair.  One is a dalmation and she is 17 years old and the love of my life but is in congestive heart failure and on a diuretic. Believe it or not, she is still very active and agile and can outwalk me any day of the week...but she can't make it to the door fast enough on Lasix so this rug is starting to smell like the Ditches of Bombay.  I have all the enzyme stuff and was all ready to go to town on this rug today after a good vaccuming but...I ache, burn and wish someone would shoot me between the eyes with a deer rifle right about now!  I am so disgusted with myself because I always wake up with a short list of things I want to accomplish and if I don't complete at least one of them by noon...it's all over but the shouting!

So...I hear ya and wish I had something besides the pool boys at Sherrines to motivate you but you know the old adage.."How do you eat an elephant?  One piece at a time."  Guess we fibromites just have to take smaller bites.

hugs

donna

Posted 1/6/2009 8:26 PM (GMT 0)
Hey gals,
Donna...I think I can outdo you on the dog hair...I have TWO Golden Retrievers and one mixed 16 to 17 year old mutt that has sheperd and chow mixed in...talk about dog hair! It is everywhere and you know, I just give in to it. I find myself pulling hairs out of my mouth at times, I know, sounds gross, but somehow you get used to it. We also had a cat, little KC, who was about 17 years old that we had to put down two days before Xmas because she was in renal failure, so yes, that hair too. Like you, Donna, a lot of my house is wood floors and tile, so that does make life easier. Things get very complicated though when we have company, especially my son and daughter in law, my DIL is allergic to dogs! She's such an angel, though, she NEVER says a word. In fact, they have a dog.
Okay, I'm done for now...
Miriam
Posted 1/6/2009 10:02 PM (GMT 0)
I can totally relate to your feelings of non-motivation after being a super-motivated person. I will say that since I got my medication "right" I am starting to get that feeling back again! It's only been a month on new meds/dosages and finally I feel those stirrings inside again. (For me, it's not so much cleaning as I have a housekeeper, but I feel like I might write again, or do more academic work - that's my "thing" - or at least it was.)

Rest and stress reduction is important too! Oh ya - and aerobic exercise. These things are all little gifts that add up to the remedy.
Posted 1/6/2009 10:45 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Marlee,

You pull so many up with your advice and well meanings. Sorry you are down under so to speak. I think it is also the state of affairs in our country. Even those of us fortunate enough to not be directly touched have to feel all people are going through. I find it very difficult to get motivated when all you hear is bad news. I have stopped turning it on and feel better. Of course January is a tough month. I live in florida and have no more ambition than any northerner. I just left NH after being there for a month and cannot say I feel any different here.

I notice a lot of us mention having been quite the perfectionist, have you picked up on that. Now we can't keep our standards where we want them so get really discouraged, perhaps!!

Hugs, Patsie
Posted 1/7/2009 2:19 AM (GMT 0)
I find myself often so unmodivated and it seems like some days even sitting or laying around takes more energy than I have. But when I know something(s) really need to be done, I start with one thing. And by finishing that one thing, it propels me to become like a busy bee. I cannot sit still until everything else on my list is done. I suggest starting with one thing, and seeing where that takes you. But also, buying something always makes me feel better
Posted 1/7/2009 12:26 PM (GMT 0)
To Schutlhund,

I write too and was interested to know you do too. In the past few months I published my first cookbook. It was really an effort for business reasons but caught on in a pretty good fashion.

Cannot tell I write by the fast way I post hehehe! I also have a passion for German Shepherds, they are magnificent animals.

Lastly, I only have fibro also and am interested in how Lyrica works for you. Honestly I am very afraid of the weight gain side affect. Any input???

Hugs, Patsie
Posted 1/7/2009 3:04 PM (GMT 0)

Marlee-

From everyones posts, I think we are all in the same boat- no motivation here either. I'm cold, tired and in more pain from one of the worst winters here that I can remember. It took all I had last night just to clean my bathroom- talk about the Health Dept., glad they were not around to see the disaster! I even missed the luau last night! Be gentle on yourself. Your still healing from the broken rib, and probably need a little more rest from the holidays. I know I do.

I am not going to start a thing till next week and believe me my To Do list is very long.

GamJill

Posted 1/7/2009 3:27 PM (GMT 0)
Ok, if we are unmotivated maybe it's time for some rest and relaxation. How about a good book by the window... Or renting a few funny movies. I haven't seen any "Home Inspectors" around lately and I don't think we will be graded on our house keeping abilities when we get to the pearly gates. As Erma Bombeck remarked when she knew she was terminal from kidney disease, " I don't think on my death bed I'll be wishing I'd done more housework!"

Let it ride until you have some motivation. Do the minimum. Enlist the help of family members (kids and hubby.) Or call up a friend and ask for some company while you clean then do the same at her house. Bake some cookies. Clean out your recipe box to get new dinner ideas. Write a letter to an old chum that you have been neglecting. Go visit your brother or sister. Do something that makes you happy and then attack the mess when your soul is soothed.

Above all, don't beat yourself up for not being motivated. Life is short. Eat dessert first.
Posted 1/7/2009 3:40 PM (GMT 0)
Marlee,

I know the feeling. I just sit and look at the mess. It is weird though, now and then I get the urge and just start. Even if I quit in the middle and leave a mess for the next time. But gotta do it when you have the energy.

Please don't be hard on yourself. Baby steps I guess is what we have to do. I did like the idea of getting something new. That always motivates us.

Best wishes for a wonderful painfree day.

Luv and hugs, Karen
Posted 1/7/2009 3:48 PM (GMT 0)
jeannie,

that was such a fabulous post, i just had to pop in and thank you for it myself (even though it wasn't specifically for me!) you really put into words the truth of the matter-some things are more important than a clean house! my kids are home from school today due to icy roads, and i was planning on cleaning and getting some laundry done, but now instead i think my kids and i will bake some cookies and play games and be goofy:)

thank you so much for that reminder!
Posted 1/7/2009 5:58 PM (GMT 0)
I sure don't want to go back to the obsessed perfectionist, she was a real wacko. This has been going on for awhile now so I don't think it's the weather. Actually I would like to get everything in the house done before nice weather. It's not a matter of resting I've been doing that since Christmas.

 

Jeannie I know we don't have the same views on housekeeping but it makes me feel so good having a nice clean house. Even when my sweet niece comes and cleans it makes me feel so good for awhile. Tidy house means calm mind for me.

 

Ken knows I can't get motivated so I just told him if we painted in here in the family room it might inspire me. I don't want him doing it til after his appointment with cardio on the 20th. Nothing like a nice freshly painted room for inspiration.

 

I tried to convince him that a big TV hanging on the wall would help but he didn't buy that one.

 

I hope something will inspire me.

 

Thanks for all your suggestions and I'm sorry some of you are going through the samething.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

 

 

Posted 1/7/2009 6:10 PM (GMT 0)
lolololo!ditches of Bombay!and i thought i was the only one

Posted 1/7/2009 7:38 PM (GMT 0)
I have been using these lovely bunch of ladies...and let me tell you...this group are lifesavers.....in a nutshell....they give you chores everyday...and help you (God Bless these people) to unclutter your life...give it a try marlee...they certainly helped me..one of the most unorganized people you will ever be lucky enough to meet. tongue tongue

 

Here is the addy

 

http://www.flylady.net/pages/flyinglessons.asp

Join now..you have absolutely nothing to lose and so much to gain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Posted 1/7/2009 10:04 PM (GMT 0)
Marlee
i know exactly how you feel. after my son married, i sorta turned his room into my own private room, just as a get-away. before the fibro i would of had it painted,
new drapes, and all the accessories, but now i sit in there and just look at what i could be doing, but cant. i get so dang mad at myself. i did clean out all the closets in the house for the Good Will, and i was down and out with pain for three days. i just long to do more physically. i even took out my Leslie Sansone exercise tapes, but they are just sitting next to the TV. cant even get motivated to do that. did go back to volunteering at the hospital today. We were slammed with so many emergencies and the hospital was shut down, because we couldnt take anymore patients. so i came home totally exhausted and can barely move. And my dr has the nerve to tell me "dont let this interfere with you life".....what a dumb statement.
Argggggggg. Hope you start to feel better Marlee, seems like its going to be a long winter.

Sue
Posted 1/8/2009 2:49 AM (GMT 0)
Bless you Tootie for volunteering. I would feel better about myself if I did something like that. Of course for me everything is 45 minutes away. That has become a family joke cause I do live in the middle of several cities and everything is 45 minutes away.

 

Do any of you feel more anxiety and depressed when your not productive??? I've always been my worse enemy and expect more out of myself than anyone else does.

 

Diane I will be organized in no time, right.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

Posted 1/8/2009 8:35 AM (GMT 0)
ericsmom, I use flylady too.  It really has helped me declutter & not feel so guilty when I am too sick to clean & have no motivation, like now.  I shine my sink & swish & swipe & that's it for the day sometimes.  I have probably removed 20 pickup loads of stuff I just thought I had to have but now that it's gone, I don't miss it. 

Marlee, I hate this time of year because I am so unmotivated.  So, all the rest of the year if I find something I would love to do, a jigsaw puzzle, an afghan I would love to crochet, a recipe I would like to try, etc.  I put it in my "winter" area & then I have somethings to choose from when I get this way.  I hope you are doing okay, & I hope you are taking it easy due to your ribs.  Just a good reason to kick back (don't do that literally please) & have some fun.  Chutz's check in on "what have you done for yourself lately" has really made me stop & think because I had no answer for it.  So, I am going to do something, guilt free, I just don't know what yet.  LOL  Have a good day, love & hugs, Denise

Posted 1/8/2009 1:52 PM (GMT 0)
Marlee
If i am not productive, my anxiety starts to go thru the roof. Sitting around makes my thoughts race and thus, anxiety starts creeping in. I try to go out every day,
whether it just be to the drugstore or Starbucks. I try to stay out atleast one hour.
I started crocheting afghans for the new Cancer Center at our hospital and this is helping, but holding the crochet hook for too long hurts my upper arms and neck.
No one would believe that could happen, except us Fibromites. I have to keep busy or I know I will be a wreck in a few days with anxiety. Keep up the fight Marlee,
you will make it.

Sue
Posted 1/8/2009 2:38 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Sue,

I am the exact same way. If I stay in this house too long I am off the walls. I have thought it is b/c I was so very active and productive and cannot stand the fact that I no longer am. My anxiety creeps in for no apparent reason at all. Towards the end of the day when I need to get a nice dinner going and be as "normal" as I can you would not believe how I start feeling.

Perhaps I don't realize the major psyche changes that occur with fibro???

Hugs, Patsie
Posted 1/9/2009 1:21 AM (GMT 0)
Today Ken and I were cleaning up some cause GD was coming over, sad when you taught your GD to be a neat freak and your now embarrassed for her to see your house, but I decided to empty the toy box that the kids don't use much anymore and got it out of here. So one thing out of this crowded room. Baby steps, tomorrow something else.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

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