Positive Thinking Explained

At the fibro class the doctor was explaining how our thought processes affect our pain.  I used to belong to a large group of positive thinking people and read books like the power of positive thinking and others.  I even have a large set of cassettes by a positive thinking guru.  Most of these concepts are meant to help how we think about ourselves and to give ourselves a more confidence, etc.  But I couldn't figure out how to apply this to fibromyalgia.

I tried to say to myself, "I am going to work in the yard all day.  Yep, I can do it.  Nothing can stop me."  Then I would work in the yard all day and flare up something awful!  I also had wondered if using a wheelchair during disneyland and las vegas vacation would be a cop out.  Surely if I think right, it will all be ok!   Not exactly!

So. you probably already know this, but I was so confused.  I asked the doc.  He said, "no no no, that is not how you do it!"  His explanation was a big help.  So, say you want to work in the yard.  You consider all that it takes: bending, stooping, squatting, sitting, digging, etc.  Then you think, how long can I do this before I have a flare?  Say you can do it only 15 minutes before a flare.  You work in the yard 10 minutes and take a break.  Then you work 10 more minutes and take another break.  So instead of saying, I can't work in the yard all day, so why bother?  or saying, I am going to do this all day, by hook or by crook! and having a flare, you know what you can do and you do that.  Don't give up and do what you can.  You might even eventually be able to build up to more time without a flare.

I am doing this today.  Work in the yard a little while, take a break, etc.  And I am getting a scooter for Las Vegas and a wheelchair for disneyland.  The wheelchair so I can get out and push it sometimes because you all know, we can neither sit nor stand for too long at a time.  And I am going to have a blast!  Maybe we can even go to the front of the line sometimes. 

Off to shower.  Done with my little bit of yard working today. Maybe I will try some alka seltzer flavored bubbly water and fruit juice!

Gentle hugs,

Sue

Excellent; Sue. A bit like the spoon theory, in Fibro 101 but more down to earth, no pun intended. I am really struggling with not being in one position, ie. sitting, standing, lying down for too long. For example; I wake very early, really sore. It takes all of my strength to get going. I try to get everything done before 2, or 3 pm and then lie down and rest for an hour or two. Ok, so now I get up again and work on computer, tidy house, fix a bite, etc. then around 8 or 9 pm I have to lie down again. I can't seem to find a comfortable position, so my bed becomes a war zone. Then around 11 PM I have to get up and move around a bit. I do much the same as before, get a bite, tidy, work on computer, read. Then around 2 AM, usually I can fall asleep, till around 5 or 6 am. Then I wake in agony. How in the name of Sam Hill (whoever he was) am I supposed to get that deep level sleep, so badly needed by Fibromites, when I cannot stay in bed for 7 or 8 hours without incurring more pain. Any ideas anyone?

Whenever I do any major housecleaning, I put put a favorite DVD on. I work for 10 min. and then come watch the movie for a bit then work, then watch the movie etc.. It has to be a movie I've practically memorized so I can watch for a bit then miss a bit. It took my husband a while to get used to this, he'll work for a few hours and be done. I take all day but this way, I don't overdo it and I don't risk a flare.

I am so glad you are getting the scooter and the wheelchair. Having something you don't need is way better than needing something you don't have. Don't push yourself, rest when you need to, and you'll have a terrific time. If you are really wrecked, stay in your hotel room and have your family go do their thing. Everyone gets what they need so don't feel guilty. It took a bit but my family has learned not to stay behind if I need a break. The extra rest allows me to participate later.

My therapist said to do 75% of what I could do. Wise advice. This way, I do not brazenly wipe myself out. lol

Donnaeil

Dear Stargeek, and all: Stargeek, if I needed a disability placard, and had one, and some places were taken by people w/o either a placard or a wheelchair embossed on license plate, I wouldn't let it go. I'd either inform store manager, even if I had to call them from my cell outside the store, or I'd take license plate and report them. Let the police wrangle with them. I get infuriated with inconsiderate "self entitled'' people.

This "pace yourself " is a new concept for me. I set about a task full of vim and vigor (not), but set about something with an attitude of "ït's got to be done and nobody else seems to be stepping up", kinda mad like, you know. I look out across the yard as the snow is rapidly melting and see at least two days worth of putting things to rights. I look around the house and see it hasn't been vacuumed in two months. I look at the entire cluttered set-up and want to go back to bed. It feels hopeless. It's sooooo hard to let it go. I like a nice clean tidy environment, and if I get my laundry done, that's a two day job. frustrating as all get out. My 21 year old son has been essentially living here since Christmas. I ask, he says, "ok ma", and still it doesn't get done. I love my son but it takes more energy than I have to motivate him. Yuck.

I'm on an energy budget and I over spent yesterday. I think it was moving both loveseats that put me in the red. Energy is like money when your on a tight budget and every step has to count and you can't spend it all in one place when you have many things to spend it on. I use to be rich and could waste it on non essentials but not anymore.

Tyno, you can't look at the big picture or it does overwhelm you. If I let my little mind run loose and look at the big picture I get depressed and that just zaps more energy. Do you feed your son??? If so stop feeding him til he starts pulling his weight around there. Even when I was healthy no 21 yr old was going to live with me without pulling their own weight. My now 21 yr old grandson and I went around and around over this when he was in high school. He is a gifted musician and thought he was above doing menial task around the house. It came down to change your attitude or change your address.

 

luv and hugs

Marlee

 

 

Yup, you're so right. I forced myself into a hot bath, that helped. Then I went and took care of some things that had been bothering me, which I had been slacking on. So now, I earned my rest. I don't feel so defeated having accomplished something today.

Sometimes ya just gotta get the ole engine in gear and chug a lug along.