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Posted 7/4/2011 6:00 PM (GMT 0)
I was just thinking how I have to think out things with my chronic illness. My husband is not the best support system for me. So when I do to many activities with my friends or church I sometimes can get worn down easily. My sex life is not the best, so my husband thinks if you have the energy to go with your friends ( very little) then you should be able to give him more sex! This is why I have a therapist. I try to tell him that love doesn't always have to involve sex. What happen to just holding each other. Does anybody have the same trouble? This has become an big big issue with my marriage. I know my meds. Play a big part in my libido.
Posted 7/4/2011 10:21 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, you understand where I am coming from if I go shopping or to the kids for a barbecue even though I am worn out and don't sleep well,he expects that I should be over joyed to be woke up in the middle of the night for sex and is put out when I am not.
Posted 7/4/2011 10:31 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, it seems to be a hard thing for some men to understand. My husband eventually accepted the situation, but now we're just kind of at a standstill. Like an old (really old) couple that doesn't even try anymore...but the love is still there. It does make me sad, though. Hope springs eternal - I don't know what could change it but I keep hoping.

Debbie
Posted 7/5/2011 5:03 AM (GMT 0)
Yes I totally understand. I am leaving tomorrow on a camping trip with my daughter and 3 grandchildren. I will be gone about a week and he finally said tonight 'your leaving tomorrow' questioning like. I said well actually yes thats why I am getting things I need ready to go. So tonight he says so you should come to bed and I of course don't even think about it say I am certainly not ready to go to bed I have so much to get ready still and I have another injection tomorrow and then I realized what he really wanted so I just said honey I can't I would not be able to move to finish the packing and the trip tomorrow would be so painful. I really hope he can continue to live like an old old married couple who a hand hold and a little kiss now and again. I wish sex was not so painful, during and after make me not want it at all.
Posted 7/5/2011 5:57 AM (GMT 0)
I don't get it? Ok I gear myself up to taking time for my husband and he now says I am watching my show on tv. I give up on this one.
Posted 7/5/2011 9:39 AM (GMT 0)
I, for one, feel very blessed with my husband. I feel terrible that our sex-life sucks, but he understands. Especially because we want to have a baby, and me coming off my meds right now is already impacting my 'quality of life'. It's almost putting me back to the beginning of 2009 when I had no meds and again all my husband could do was watch me suffer...even on the good days.

The fact that I also gained 10 lbs a year from 2006 to 2010 doesn't help matters. Bye-bye self-esteem. At my absolute healthiest, with muscle, I weighed 130 lbs. Now I'm a flabby 182-190, depending on the day you ask my weight.

I honestly doubt that us Fibromites are alone in any way, shape, or form when it comes to matters of 'the bedroom'. Hell, I even think, unhealthily, that my hubby would be better off with someone 'healthy' so he can get 'some'...and that makes me sad, but that's not what he wants. He wants to be married, be friends, and be lovers and for that to all happen, couples NEED help to cope with long-term illness' like this and NEED the professional help to do so.
Posted 7/5/2011 9:30 PM (GMT 0)
Sex releases "feel good" endorphines and will actually help with pain, that is if you can get past the painful fore play. I love the sex, I just hate all the "pawing" that goes on before hand. (unfortunately I have all 18 of the tender points)
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