made a decision tonight

You know what is most important in your lives - you are - for your family..

Best of luck

Sorry it has come to this, but like you said health and family comes first.
When I stopped teaching my income was cut down to a third of what it was. I was scared I wouldn't be able to pay bills, but things have worked out just right. I'm not driving as much, not paying for lunch out everyday, not spending personal money for materials, etc. I've also learned to live with less.

Wackers, everything will work out just fine.  Really!  When I left teaching I was cutting our income in half.  My husband was a teacher at the time, too.  I didn't have fibro at the time but I did want to stay home and raise my children.  My husband was worried but I told him I would shop sales and make sure the mortgage was the first thing paid. 

 

Everything did work out.  Sure we didn't have the spending money we used to have but we did develop a wonderful close-knit family.  We created so many memories and I'm "feeding" off them now.  The kids are grown, two live 1,200 miles from me, but we are still in very close contact.  My husband has passed on but I sure remember the family fun we had.  We may have been "poor" financially but we were rich in every other detail.

 

It was a very difficult decision for me, also, because at the time they were hiring first year teachers so they wouldn't have to pay them as much.  I knew when I dropped my resignation letter in the mailbox, that was the end of my career.  I don't regret it one tiny moment either!  As I started this post out...you will be just fine and hopefully you will be feeling much better and can enjoy your children and hubby now.

 

We are here for you.

 

Sherrine

Hi Wackers,

Congratulations for being brave enough to take time off for your health! I agree with your decision to leave work until you get better. I have taken a leave of absence from university, and these last four months of rest then lifestyle adjustments and health treatments has just been so restorative to my health - this is the best I've ever felt since I first got that virus which started this whole fibromyalgia thing. I am feeling really hopeful right now that everything is going to work out for the best - and you will feel that way after a few months too!

May I suggest that first of all, you just rest for a couple weeks. (As if you need to be told to do that! You're probably exhausted!) Then I would recommend that you start studying what you can do for your health and form a detailed "health action plan". I found the following books helpful in forming my own action plan:
Fibromyalgia - Your Treatment Guide_by Christine Craggs-Hinton
Foods that Fight Fibromyalgia _ by Deirdre Rawlings, PH.D, N.D.
Overcoming Adrenal Fatigue _ by Kathryn R. Simpson, MS
Rewire Your Brain _ by John B. Arden, Ph.D.
Feeling Good _ by David D. Burns, M.D.

Then you can move on to evaluating your treatments. What is working? What isn't working? What isn't worth the side effects? Is there a safer alternative to any of the drugs you may be on?

Let me tell you a story. Two months ago, I was in the pharmacy (looking for a better skincare product for my sensitive skin) when the pharmacy assistant helping me looked into my eyes and said, "you have really high levels of cortisol, which is probably affecting your thyroid function... and it looks like there's something wrong with your nervous system. Have you ever been checked for Lupus?" I was taken aback. I had never met this lady before, and I was hours away from my hometown. I had not mentioned any of my health problems bar my sensitive skin. I said, "it's funny that you should say that, because those conditions match my symptoms. How did you know that... that I'm sick? Most people think I look healthy." She nodded and said, "I'm a naturopath, and I've specialised in iridology. I saw it in your eyes. And I was just wondering if maybe Lupus was the nervous system problem because it looks like you have the malar rash." Moral of the story: maybe iridology isn't a quack science like I always used to assume it was. After all, fibromyalgia IS a nervous system problem, even though I don't have Lupus. And since I've started treating myself for adrenal fatigue (high cortisol), I've been getting a lot better. I haven't started treating for thyroid problems yet because there's basically no point until my adrenals are strong enough to cope with thyroid treatment. I would recommend seeing a naturopath/iridologist as your first, semi-diagnostic port of call. It's really helped me, and I only had a quickie, one-minute consult. Also, the naturopath was kind enough to recommend a really good doctor nearby where she was practising. I've started seeing this doctor and since moved to the area in order to be closer to him - that's how helpful he is. He's not afraid of ordering a few abnormal tests and he doesn't treat me like a hypochondriac or psychosomatic.

Once you've determined what health treatments to keep out of what you already do, and got some kind of idea of what's gone wrong in your body, then you can use your action plan to trial a new treatment.

I would suggest trying to see an occupational therapist who specialises in neuromuscular therapy and chronic pain management. I would also suggest seeing a clinical psychologist who is not going to treat you as if fibromyalgia is depression, but is rather going to use the principles of neuroplasticity to help your brain to break the chronic pain cycle. I have found the psychologist helpful to me - I finally started seeing one a month ago! I got over being upset about people saying it was all in my head, and just decided to try it. I'm glad I did. Not that it's necessarily going to be a cure, but it certainly helps.

And I now believe that diet modifications and supplements are helpful if one of your problems is adrenal fatigue. Ideas for diet and supplements are in the "Overcoming Adrenal Fatigue" book.

Anyway... I really hope you get better within the next half year or so, which I believe is a realistic timeframe.

All the best,
Jasmine

Wackers,
The decision is the most difficult thing in the situation, once it is made you are going to feel better, i`m sure. As for money we have here, in Bulgaria a proverb difficult to translate but the meaning is similar - in certain situation money should take the back seat.
Hugs

We stayed home for our summer vacation and found sites around our home. We had an Amish community close to us and would all go in the fall during the peak time for leaf change. Oh, so beautiful, it didnt cost much, kids went on buggy rides,browsed through Amish hardware stores, saw groceries packed in plastic bags for sale, etc. Then we would take them to an Amish buffet for a fried chicken dinner. This really wasnt expensive.

Sometimes you can tour businesses in your area. We toured the Smucker's Jelly plant and it was a learning experience. Trips to the zoo aren't expensive, etc.

We also splurged for a membership to a lake park by us when the kids were small. It had a beach for the kids to play so we went every day in the summer. By the time they got in public school, they wanted to go to the public pool where their school friends were so we bought a season family pass for that. It was great entertainment during those long, hot, school-less days. LOL

We always celebrated birthdays but would take turns with the kids for the parties. My kids are winter and early spring babies. That meant house parties. ugh So I had one party at a roller skating rink. They had specials for parties. Then I found out we could rent out the public pool for parties after hours. The pool closed at 6 PM and the public could not be there. It was really inexpensive and we did have to hire a couple of lifeguards but that wasn't bad, either. This way we had the party celebration in the summer and all three kids could invite whomever they wanted! We had the pool for two hours and brought snacks, sodas, ice, dips, and of course birthday cake. The party was for one of the kids but my other children and all of their friends joined in and had a blast. The following year we did this for another of our kids for theirr party celebration. This made them feel so special. My kids loved this and didn't mind that their birthday parties were months after their real birthday. Plus, we always celebrates their birthdays on their birthday with our family members.

These are just some suggestions. Your chamber of commerce could help you with ideas, too, I think...that is if you have a chamber of congress in your communities in England. You will be surprised at the things you can do for little or nothing. Parks are great too for family picnics. Very inexpensive. Kids, as well as adults, don't need those very expensive vacations. You spend a ton of money and it's over in a week.

Sherrine

Congrats on making the hard decisions! I sometimes think that we are encouraged to believe the ads that say we can have it all. We can't-that have it all fantasy can be exhausting.

You are making a decision for you and your family and your health and that is to be commended.

Hi Kristi,

You aren't lazy, know that. And you aren't "taking the easy way out". You can only do so much and with fibromyalgia, it just sometimes becomes impossible to continue working. Do what feels right to you. If the stress of work is effecting your health and you can't do it anymore, you know what is right.

We are all here for you.

Wackers, I feel for you too. Sometimes it feels like you are defeated, but we just have to learn to go with the situation and balance things out. Where we are comfortable and can still do things.

Hugs to you both...

Karen...