Hi Roxanne. My experience with hycosamine was exactly as you described yours. It also wiped me out, making me exhausted and "spacey". Don't let the doc's condescend to you about your responses to these drugs. Keep in mind that they are all very powerful meds that often provoke side effects that are more debilitating the the IBS.
I've had IBS for over 38 years. I have tried EVERY med available. Like floss, my case is quite severe and has frustrated and perplexed all the doctors I have seen over the years. With each new med introduced onto the market, I get a prescription. None of them have ever worked for my symptoms. Some, like the anti-anxiety meds help with the stress and fear involved with leaving the house, but they do not actually address the IBS itself. I don't want to discourage you because everyone is different and hopefully you will find a med that works, but don't expect miracles. This is a chronic, incurable "syndrome" which most of us have learned to live with through changes in routines and expectations. Most importantly, you must remember that those who do not suffer with IBS will NOT ever understand so you have to get tought and learn to let some of the judgements, criticisms, and disappointments of others roll off your back. Otherwise, the emotional tumult of trying to make everyone happy will only worsen your condition.
You mentioned that you missed Church for Easter. I've missed Church for the last three weeks and was so depressed at the possibility of missing Easter as well. I had a team of people praying for me and fortunately, I was able to go on Sunday. But I did miss my son's engagement party. Yes, I felt terrible but NOT because I did something wrong. I felt terrible because I wanted to be there and this illness got in the way. I did not feel guilty, I felt sad. Appropriate regret and sadness is fine. Guilt and self-recrimination is not.
Hope your finding it helpful here! I know I do!