(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((massive hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry you feel like this Bunny. Trust me, you're not the only one who feels like that. At the moment I feel pretty much the same as you, but I try not to let it show - dont ask me why. Maybe its because the people around me don't have a clue what i am going through and I don't want to share it with them because they aren't really interested.
I got ignored by my doctors for ages - its only becaue I have managed to see a new doctor this time that I have got anywhere. Any time in the past i have been its been a prescription for Buscopan which never worked for me, and that was it. No real tests, nothing. I hate the fact now that I could be happily sitting at my desk at work, or just watching TV at home and from nowhere I have to make a run for it to the bathroom, and more and more the last few times it has happend its been touch and go whether I would get there in time.
I would probably consider myself a bit of a control freak, because of all the things I have been through in my life I have become very independant and like to do things for myself, and not have someone to rely on. So now, because this illness has come out of nowhere over the past 3-4 weeks, I feel like it's controlling me - what I eat, where I eat, how much I eat, even where I go and how long I think I can stay there for. I want to go and watch a film at the cineman this weekend but I just cant because I would probably end up missing half the film!
I don't know how I try and stay positive - tomorrow will be a differnt story when I'm on my own and I can be how I want to be - which is miserable, feel sorry for myself and probably cry buckets. the draining feeling I have had recently because of the sleepless nights and the frequency of the toilet visits is phenominal for me. I'm normally full of energy and always on the go, laughing and talking. This last fornight I couldnt have been quieter if I wanted and even my husband has noticed now when I'm in a good mood. I feel like I want to take my entire body back to the shop for a full refund and exchange, because I got sold a faulty one. But I cant, and that feleing of frustration is just so overwhelming.
Maybe when things calm down for you you will feel better, and I really do feel for you at the moment. Its hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel when it's this bad. But keep on at your doctor until he will do something for you. Perhaps you should show him the leaflet that someone posted in one of the other threads about what people should understand about IBS when they don't have it!
I really hope you feel better soon. Go ahead and cry - I'll probably be joining you in a few hours!! ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bunny))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))00