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Had a terrible day I'm over it!!!!!!

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Irritable Bowel Syndrome
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Posted 5/16/2008 1:37 AM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone hope all is well I had a ****ing terrible day. I had the D have not had it in awhile I know it was something I ate and on top of that I've been feeling constipated for awhile too.I hate it when I get a day like this I hope getting the D will make me feel better afterwards.I'm fine right now I guess that was what needed to happen for the problems to stop that ****ing food I had ordered.I will never order out again see I do not cook my mom still cooks for me I know in my twenties and I should be cooking for myself.I just never learned how and I tried on time but that was a disaster,lol.I notice when I order out my I usually get the D after I eat the food.I will stick to my meals being cooked for me well and I know it wont mess me up cause it's the diet that I need to stick to.I had a grilled chicken I guess the chicken was really fatty that does it fatty foods does not go good with IBS.Anyways I'm feeling great cause the pains over I'm good for the rest of the night until I eat again but hopefully eating my mother's cooking wont upset my stomach.I can not wait for next month to see my GI doctor there are somethings that I want to address to him about just getting under control my symptoms.I want to find the best way to improve my digestive health I need to start really drinking water a lot and adding more fiber supplements to my diet like Bennefiber 3 times a day.Getting it from the cooked vegetables that I eat I guess is not enough but I also need to tell him that I will not accept him telling me that I'm going to have to try to deal with IBS I will not take that from him cause he is there to make that IBS will not control my life.I'm going to tell him that he needs to really work with me to find ever possible way to improve my quality of life by improving my digestive health to the healthiest that it can be.I will not take that from him if he does not agree I will find another GI doctor that will help me meet my needs.IBS sucks I'm feed up I will not let it control my life I'm even in therapy to help me with the anxiety that I get with dealing with it when it comes being around people.I have goals and dreams that I want to conquer I want to be successful in life I'm tired of my symptoms keeping me from being around people.I had no luck with anyone responding to my posting to start up an IBS support group cause I know meeting people face to face with the same problems will make me feel a whole lot better about living with IBS.To be able to have that relation and support would be great and would make having IBS more barrable.And one of my issues that I have I know it a mental one I feel at times that people know what I'm going through when it comes to having stomach problems.I will be to myself for example in my apartment I live on the first floor and with IBS we often run to the bathroom several times and I'm constantly flushing the toilet.I thinks that my neighbors are probably wondering what is wrong with him thinking that they are talking about me.I start feeling embarrassed and I always either turn on the shower fosset to drown out the sounds of my passing gas,lol,thinking they may hear that or wonder what's wrong him.I know it's all in my head but I cant help feel embarrassed over it.I thinks sometimes that they are laughing about me doing that like what's his issue with going to the bathroom so much.LOL yeah guys I've gotten a lot of issues dealing with this I just hate to feel embarrassed.I hope one day I will get over this and really know it's nobodies bussniess (sorry I spelled that word wrong really tried sounding it out,lol) and if they are there is something wrong with them not me.I have a lot of things that I want to accomplish in my life and I'm trying every possible way to not let IBS control my life or get the best of me it's made me a fighter.I will not let it get the best of me I will be a winner over this ****ing syndrome **** you IBS.I'm going to get that job!!!!,I'm going to be in that relationship!!!!!,I'm going to socialize and make new friends!!!!!,I'm going to travel!!!!!.The help of GOD and my drive to fight I will overcome believe that,that is real talk.I hope everyone feels the same way I do do not let this ****ing thing get the best of you and know this GOD does not give you to much that you can not handle.I will still keep everyone on this forum in my prayers and will still keep praying for everyone's health to be the healthiest.This forum makes me know that I am not really alone in this and I thank GOD for it and everyone on it."Greater is he that is within me that is in the World",No weapon formed against me shall prosper!!!!!",He is a healer I believe that with all of my heart if not by a doctor by him only!!!!!!! ALL MY LOVE, J xooxoxo :-)

Post Edited (jtaurus) : 5/15/2008 7:41:01 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 5/16/2008 2:10 AM (GMT 0)
You might not have a face to face support group but you do have us :-) . I too sometimes wonder what my neighbors think of me. I live on the third floor and you can hear every time the water is running in not just the downstairs apartment but also the the one down the hall and the one on the other side of the wall. The apartments are set up in a square and all the bathrooms are in the same corner. So they can hear every blasted time I flush. They can also hear when my husband takes out the shower curtain rod and when I trip over the computer wires all over the place. But the nice thing it that they don't always know that it's you. It could be the guy in the apartment behind you or the one above them. And I have found that things like that get tuned out. Everybody uses the bathroom so a flushing toilet is no big deal. I don't even notice the noises coming from my neighbors apartments anymore.

I know that your mom cooking for you is comforting. That and you know who she makes things so you know how your tummy is going to react. But learning how to cook might just help. Even if it is just you getting a rice cooker and taking it from there. Mine is a combo cooker and steamer so you can cook two things at once with the push of a button. I personally feel much more comfortable cooking my own meals because then I can control exactly how they are made. And if something sets me off because it was made with olive oil( oils are a trigger for me unless in baked goods) then I only have myself to blame. Makes me extra careful about what I cook and I have noticed that my tummy has liked me for it. Still have problems but not as bad. Mind you as I type this I am getting over some intestinal distress caused by tonight's dinner.
Posted 5/16/2008 12:05 PM (GMT 0)
I too would like to find a face to face support group. Or even just post-colon cancer would be helpful (how I ended up with IBS like symptoms). But what a safe haven and true God-send message boards like this are! Can you imagine what all we'd go thru 20 years ago? Without this tool? We'd feel SO ALONE!

That said, I've come a long way in 9 years. I think I went thru many stages - shock, denial, letting go of my former once a day poop (sorry for that lovely detail), of being able to eat anything I wanted, to resigning myself to this situation. I also used to try and educate others, to my symptoms, to the way I have to eat (or not eat! Not eating actually can turn around D, if I do it wisely with fluids but no solids) to finally letting them think it's my stomach that is bothering me. I've also learned that for many people they think there's a magic, do-all pill out there that we can just pop in our mouths, and then "enjoy life". Do you know how many times I've heard those words?!! Or "you only live once....." yeah, but while living "once" and eating all the foods that they think I should because I should "live life", I'm dying inside with cramping, gas and all out D.

To sum it up as best I can - those with normal colons just do not get it. AT ALL. Even our doctors do not get it. Try as they may, if they can eat chili for lunch and then see a full afternoon's worth of patients, and not have to rush to the restroom, then they have no idea what we all go thru.

So my approach now is to say screw it to those that don't get it. Not to their faces mind you, I just don't even bother to worry about them anymore - if they hear me flush 5 times, too bad! If they see me eat very plain foods and moderately at that (extremely small portions), too bad. They don't have my GI tract! I just smile. And go on my way. No matter what I say, it will never make a difference. One of the most common things I also hear is - you STILL have problems, even 9 years later?

Sigh......vent with us, anytime.

We all GET IT!

Now do I wish the rest of the world could walk a day in our shoes - yes and no. Just yes long enough to make them understand us, just a little. But in no way shape or form, do I wish this 24/7 struggle on anyone......except maybe someone evil! LOL

Mary/Marsky
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