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guys I'm going through a hard time

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Irritable Bowel Syndrome
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Posted 8/28/2009 12:42 AM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone I hope you all are well I'm doing somewhat alright this is the darkest hardest point in my life I'm going through a real downward spiral.My symptoms are really really bad lately and I feel like I'm going crazy cause my anxiety is through the roof!!!! I think I am going to have a nervous breakdown I need someone to help me fast!!!!!!
Posted 8/28/2009 4:24 AM (GMT 0)
I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. I realized just recently from some of your latest posts that you are a young man, 29 years old, suffering so much with your IBS. You are the same age as one of my sons. You also mentioned having really bad anxiety as well. I was wondering if you are on any medication for your anxiety. Before I got on medication for my depression and anxiety, my IBS symptoms were much more frequent and bothersome. The anxiety made my IBS so much worse. When I got on medication, it certainly didn't get rid of my IBS; but it helped to reduce the frequency of my symptoms.

I was also wondering how you are eating. Do you have a good diet plan that is "IBS-friendly?" The helpforibs site gives a lot of helpful information regarding diet, what's good to eat, what's not.

You also mentioned in a previous post that you feel like you cannot even get out to socialize or date. There are plenty of people who have digestive problems who date, fall in love, and eventually marry. My niece married a man with digestive issues; I think he has colitis. They are so happy and so much in love. It is possible, but you need to get your anxiety under control and get out and socialize! You can do it.

I hope you have a better day tomorrow.
Posted 8/28/2009 5:05 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Kgood I do have a diet that I have been on for awhile but I guess because of how I've been feeling mentally it's effected my body in a bad way.I am on anti-depressents but not have been good with taking them like I should,I was seeing a therapist and phiciatrist but I have been unable to make it in to my appointments do to how I've been feeling.I got back on my anti-depressent last night I was able to sleep some,but I've run out of my foods for my diet and things are really bad today.I'm supposed to go see my therapist today around four but I'm afraid I wont be able to make it in again because my body is not acting the way it should be in order for me to get out.My therapist says no matter how I feel I should come in but I wont even be able to sit through the appointment without maybe having to go use the public restroom and that is what I fear the most.It's early though hopefully I'll feel better to go thank you again Karen I'm staying strong and always keeping the hope take care.
Posted 8/28/2009 9:15 PM (GMT 0)

Hi, jt80,

I hope you were able to make your appointment today.  Keeping up with dr. appointments and taking medications regularly are so important.  It's all about routine; I can't live without routine.  It seems to help me get through my days and weeks. 

Your doctor will understand if you need to use the restroom.  And I understand your not liking to use public ones; I don't like to do that either.  But sometimes it is just necessary. 

Keep us posted on how you are doing.

 

Posted 8/29/2009 1:27 AM (GMT 0)
I did not make my appointment and I was mad about that I just have not been feeling myself to go anywhere.Yes routine is good I had one going things were good for awhile but somewhere things just changed so quickly.I'm not going to focus on the negative cause I attract negative energy to me that's not good at all.I'm trying to find the positive I spoke to my dad today letting him know how I've been feeling he was like I'm not the only one living with this but I told him it feels like that sometimes.I just decided I'm going to live somehow not sure how but I will,I'm not going to let this bother me any longer.I will keep you updated on my progress keep me in your prayers everyone take care. :-)
Posted 8/29/2009 8:07 PM (GMT 0)
JT80,  Hi hun, so sorry that you are feeling so bad.  I know what you mean about the anxiety though,  mine also is through the roof with my father being so ill.  The doc put me on a antihistime for anxiety...what the heck is does not work..Its called Hydroxyz HCL 25mg.

He will not give any meds that you could become dependent on.

My fathers lukemia is really getting him down.  He is usually so up-beat and strong in faith.  But yesterday was not a good day, really depressed, and has virtually stopped doing anything that he normally would.  It looks like he has given up and thats just not him.  So I hope when I get there today we will have a better day.

All this stress has got my IBS through the roof, not sleeping, everything I eat is killing me, so that I can feel less pain I will have to do a dreaded enema today,  ok so what else is old....lol

Welcome to my world.  But JT, your young and hopefully yours will resolve itself.  I wish there was a answer for all of us suffering...take care and your in my prayers...Leslie nono

Posted 8/29/2009 9:37 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Leslie take care of yourself and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your dad.
Posted 8/30/2009 3:24 AM (GMT 0)
JT80 I am certain you will pull through. I am a male who was hit by UC full force when I was 28, that is 23 years ago. I had always suffered from anxiety and depression, and the UC put me over the edge. I hit rock bottom, shut off from the world, but you know what? I soon enough got back up again because I got bored of being so isolated. I soon enough learned that when you are that young (and yes 28 IS young) your body heals better. I stopped all meds and in 18 months or so was in full remission, and my mojo came back too. My only advice to you is to be patient - with the disease and with yourself. And softpedal the antidepressants, they create other issues you do not need on top of UC. Take it from one who has been there.
Posted 8/31/2009 1:04 AM (GMT 0)

I have hope that things will get better for me they just have to I just have to decide that I want to live and not be isolated anymore.That is easier said then done I always say lol cause my symptoms are uncontrolable I feel I'm at the mercy of my body at times.I feel it's very complicated unless I'm making it complicated,cause I know I'm supposed to eat three square meals a day which I dont cause I do not have many breakfast foods to pick from that will agree with me.Second I get full easily so if I ate breakfast at eleven two hours later I would not be sure if I'd be hungry and I usually would have to leave my apartment for a dr's appointment or to go to my mothers.I'd be afraid what I'd have to eat if I decided to have some protien with some steamed vegetables if that would settle and not upset my stomach.I would not to be able to be around people having just had something to eat without experiencing having gas or a bm or the dreaded D.The only foods that I eat is my dinner that helps with having more formed bms cause they contain veggies to help with that.That food can get boring,I cant tolerate deli meats or peanut butter so I dont have much choices for sandwiches only like a chicken sandwich which I would have to make myself.Snacks also not to many that I can have really so my foods choices are scares I dont know guys I'm just hopeing this letter I just faxed over to my gi doctor about how I'm unhappy with the care that I'm getting from him will help some.I hope he will take me seriously about my symptoms and help me out having test done for celiac again,or food intolerant test.Really the symptoms that bother me or excessive gas,frequent bms,and the dreaded d,oh the urgency.I also need to take care of my mental health need to get back to therapy keep taking my anti-depressents without skiping a night,and get on a anti-anxiety med,and try to get myself to a church and open up more to people about my conditon without feeling embarrassed.

My goal is to get my symptoms undercontrol before I turn thirty cause I do not want to go through my thirties alone and isolated.Really I want to be able to sit on my ass for awhile without feeling the every minute of need to let something out lol.I know I'll laugh more again smile more and be the outgoing person that I should be.I just need to take care of my mind first so it can get along with my body it's going to be a process but I know I can do it.God this not bring me through all that he brought me through to be alone!!!! So thanks guys I keep you all in my prayers as I do always and you do the same for me sending you all my love take care. :-) tongue xoxoxo

Posted 8/31/2009 2:49 AM (GMT 0)
jt80 Hi,

First of all I don't have IBS, just visiting and trying to learn about it because I have a friend who does.

I'm on the Lyme, Thyroid and Breast Cancer Forumns, my three issues.

Please don't be upset with me but what I'm getting from your posts is that your making excuses and not following through on your diet, medication, missing therapist appointments.

I know this isn't easy nothing is when we have chronic diseases we all have days where we are so helpless/sick/depressed we feel what's the use. but you have to find a way to follow through and it sounds like you're going to do just that when you say your goal is to get your symptoms under control.

Put your wellbeing first follow your diet, take your medications on schedule, keep your appointments. Don't let anything stand in your way, you can do it, you have to do it and I know you will.

Jane
Posted 8/31/2009 6:23 PM (GMT 0)
Jane's right jt80, it's easy to say we'll do what it takes to feel well, later in the day, tomorrow, etc. I did that. But realized hey I was missing out on feeling as well as I possibly could, day in, day out. So now I know what works for me (a combination of diet, reducing stress, meal portions and times I eat, meds, and basically having the guts - lol - to say no do social outings I just cannot comfortably partake in). I no longer even apologize for my situation.

I truly believe that I managed my situation much better once I accepted the fact that I was no longer "normal" - ie, one dump a day, eating anything I wanted without consequences.

Here's an example for you, right after my cancer I was introduced to a teacher's wife at my child's school. She had an emergency bowel resection due to her bowels being nicked while under for a simple GYN procedure. One simple procedure turned into her almost dying. But she survived a bowel resection, being reconnected, etc. No cancer, just major surgery. She suddenly found herself unable to eat the foods she used to be able to, without D, like me. So I was put in touch with this poor lady, hoping since I was a few months ahead of her, that she could relearn how to eat to manage IBS like symptoms.

Well, she wanted to keep eating whatever she used to and on top of that our city's very spicy chili! We live in OH, you've probably heard of Cincinnati style chili. I would suggest to her, please stop, don't eat it, maybe in 6 months or a year you can eat it, but not now (I'll never be able to eat it every again, but I didn't want to burst her bubble at this point). She would not stop eating it. I finally just had to say until you make the commitment to change your diet, you will continue to have D.

I've never heard from her again. I've run into her husband occasionally, he'll say her diet is all messed up. And sighs. I sigh too because if only she had changed her diet, that might have made her feel just 50% or even more - better.

I would gently suggest you start over jt80. Start at the beginning. Start with the food journal. Eat food in small portions, try a low residue diet for a while. I know you're on meds. Sometimes meds can give me D. They're a help in one way but a hindrance in another. See if your meds might be inadvertently giving you IBS symptoms too.

Seriously, pretend this is the first day of your IBS and take this back to ground zero/square one. Start fresh and see if a new, okay I have IBS, what can I do, to feel better attitude.

What you're doing isn't working. I only offer these suggestions in the kindest way possible.
Posted 8/31/2009 11:54 PM (GMT 0)
Wow thank you mcjames and marsky I needed those words my fear is not accepting this is really IBS,I've been fighting to get my stomach and digestive system back to normal.My fears over my symptoms have kept me isolated and thinking now the the outside world knows what I go through.I've realalized it's kind of my fault the way things have gotten cause I've allowed my mind to focus on the negative things about my situation and life.It's really made me sick physically thinking like this,I cant help it when I sit at home all the time infront of my tv letting my mind wonder to those dark places.I really do not want to be homebound for the rest of my life I need distractions for my mind to keep from going to that dark place in my mind.Your right guys I got to start from scratch and get back on track like taking my anti-depressents no matter what going to my therapy appointments no matter what and keeping and eating more of the foods I can tolerate like not ordering out at all.Facing my biggest fear my fear of going through my symptoms in public and accepting now I go number two different then most other people lol and that everyones stuff stinks not just mine lol.I have been beating myself up that I'm discusting and gross the number of times I go and feel embarrassed when no one is around.Wow I think I just had a a ha moment lol,but I just need to figure out a way to be ok with how things are and get back out there and live life no matter what not letting IBS keep me from loveing my life.It's going to take a lot to figure out how I'm going to do this how I'm going to get rid of the stress that I feel so much.

First get back to therapy and try to get on a anti-anxiety but I wont be able to do that until I go see my phyciatrist.She also told me kind of the same thing you guys are trying to let me know do I want to continue living this lonely life? or am I going to try my hardest to not continue to be alone and comsumed in worry and stress? I need to figure out a way also when I go through my symptoms meaning when I'm in that bathroom on the toilet to not beat myself up over what's happening.I start thinking my neighbors are thinking of me in discust for the number of times I go use my own bathroom.I really need to stop thinking like that and just have faith that I'm ok it is what it is.Thank you guys I kind of feel a little better cause honestly earlier I was crying my eyes out and just really feeling sorry for myself.I want to feel happiness actually make my own happiness and not think that I'll never have it because of living with IBS.I have to pick myself up by my bootstraps and change things myself and know that God loves me cause I think he does not sometimes cause I dont understand why he lets this to continue to happen to me?

Keeping the foods that I need is going to be hard since I do not work and collect social security and money runs out fast and foods stamps is not that much.I need to keep a budget and shop for food smartly looking for deals oh and starting to cook for myself and just try eating something before having to go out and see what happens.I really appreciate you guys and have love for you all I wish I could meet you all in real life to bad you guys do not live in my city.I'm actually waiting to hear from someone I've connected to who has been dealing with IBS longer then me I heard thier ok with it and have figured out a way to live thier life and love it.As always sending you all my love and I will keep you guys updated on my progress thank you all God bless. :-)

Post Edited (jt80) : 8/31/2009 5:59:35 PM (GMT-6)

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