Kidneys Failed Suddenly

Oh Wow, I am so sorry, Guy.

To tell you my experience, not just talking out of nowhere, my kidneys were damaged after an emergency liver transplant when I nearly died at 12 years old. A couple years later, I had a kidney transplant, which was also traumatizing, and now I need another.

I haven't had cancer, but I know how horrible such illnesses are, particularly one on top of another. What I'd advise, is, right away, start making arrangements with a hospital to put her on a transplant list. This takes a long time, so start the minute you can. Also, It would help if both you and her whole family can help with the process. There's probably no other way to give her healthy kidneys again.

Acupuncture may help her to relieve stress, but I don't think in any way that it can heal damaged organs. Also, it's very important - and don't trust a hospital to do this part - that your girl finds things to do, projects to work on, and a passion to create a non-medical identity around. This is absolutely critical for preserving her sanity during all of this. Help her to feel that she is not just a medical story.

Ah, you asked why I need another kidney transplant. Now that is a long story. Well, I was born with a genetic defect that gave me sick organs as a child. Eventually, I needed a liver transplant, but because it was done so late that I was almost dead, it damaged my kidneys in the process, and I needed the first kidney transplant.

However, during all of these multiple childhood surgeries, no-one ever took a moment to consider the psychological damage that had been done. I never felt that my body was my own, never safe from medical molestation. See why I say that the creation of a non-medical identity is so crucial?

Yes, I had to take anti-rejection medication, and I hated that. I had a few moderately good years in late high school and early college, but then I started suffering from another series of bodily pain, and more procedures. I had finally had enough, and I wanted this time to die. A few years ago, I rejected all medication in a final attempt to send a message that the psychological damage of being sick cannot be ignored.

Again I nearly did die, but on the last day my parents came to me and asked if I wanted to try and turn things around. I said I could try, and so I began a long, hard process of dialysis and listing for another kidney transplant. My family has now paid attention to the trauma done, and I am working closely with my Dad to recover my sanity. The doctors, however, have never learned, and they still believe that an ill person's psychological health is no issue.

I hate dialysis. I vehemently despise and am disgusted by it, so I'm glad your girlfriend has working kidneys again. However, I wouldn't trust that they'll stay that way forever, after having failed once. I suggest she talk to a doctor she trusts about a potential transplant in the future, while for now trying to resolve her cancer. Set up the options, so she can act if the need and/or possibility do arise. I do hope she can get rid of the tubes, too. I hate tubes.

Good luck to you and her. I send my sympathies, and you/she can talk to me again if you need to. My email is [email protected]