Feeling Stupid....

Hey Everyone,

Does anyone else feel as though they are just getting dumber?!

I am in my last year of college (I was diagnosed my sophomore year and took a year off to recover after kidney failure, DVT, and shingles), since my return I have found school to be SO HARD. I attend a pretty rigorous university so given it is supposed to be challenging, but I just have NO motivation to even do busywork!

My assignments are late and half-hearted, I feel that even when I study hard the resulting grade doesnt even reflect it. I also feel like I cannot hold my own in discussions, I just sound like an idiot, I used to be so good at arguing my points, now I get frustrated, anxious and worked up if I am engaged in a discussion that goes on for too long. I do not forget words or names, and I dont really lose my train of thought etc...but is this what brain fog is??

I am coherent and alert, yet I can hardly retain conceptually easy information, things just dont seem to "stick" in my brain like they used to....sometimes when I read they are just meaningless words on the page.

Sorry this was partially a venting/"woe is me" post, as I am feeling totally defeated right now, I dont even feel capable of keeping up with "normal" people anymore, at least not intellectually.

We were just "talking" about brain fog and trying to work over on the fibromyalgia forum....I REALLY understand where you're coming from misscali415! Except I'm the teacher, not the student!

(The following is partially a repeat of my post on the fibro forum....it is not really a duplicate, though!)

I'm having lots of problems with brain fog...but unlike you, I'm forgetting things frequently. Just tonight as I was teaching my math class (college level), I went blank for several seconds at a time....trying to remember a word or where I was in a math problem. It's very very scary! Although the students seem to think it's funny! :)

I only teach part-time....I also have a full-time job as a scientist at a different university where I literally support a NASA mission! I just can't afford to be scatter-brained right now! :(

I've been handling my day job by asking everyone who ever gives me input on a task to please send it to me in email so that I can print things out. If they give me instructions or input verbally I won't remember it. I make LOTS of lists and tape them where I can see them.

But unfortunately, I still forget things, and I definitely can't think on my feet like I used to....

I work at a university that has several Nobel Prize winners; I work with some of the smartest people in the world. And I feel like I'm getting dumber by the second.... :(

Sorry I'm no help at all, am I? :)

(((hugs)))
JoAnn

One more quick comment: research has shown that if older people play games such as crossword puzzles or Sudoku, it helps to preserve cognitive function. In other words, if you don't use it, you lose it.

I've been trying to play at least one game of a difficult level of Sudoku every day.....I hope it's helping me to at least maintain my current level of cognition! :)

misscali,

Thanks for the terrific article. It's the first thing I have read that explains what we call brain fog in a way that distinguishes between cognitive disfunction and brain lupus, which I know I do not have.

It's a real problem, isn't it. Nasalady, you're right about puzzles and games. There is a website called Luminosity:

www.lumosity.com/

that has brain games that supposedly help your memory. I've tried it and it's exactly what nasalady is talking about.

I also explain my cognitive issues to my closest friends.

You don't know how much I appreciate reading this article. Thanks!

Pat

This is a great topic - thanks to all of you.  I experienced what I considered to be "fibro fog" for many years prior to dealing with the onset of UCTD and other AI symptoms.  It would generally last a day or so and then I would return to normal.  It was generally manageable.  In the last year or so, it seems much more chronic with certain days being worse - and then I don't feel that return to "normal" in the same way.  I've never been a math or technologically oriented person - I lean towards the artistic side, and the most disturbing thing to me is loss of creative energy and thought process. 

It's like I can't pull it together or maintain focus.....it all peters out before I can make something happen.  And I also notice memory deficits and the inability to stay "audibly" focused.  Formerly I had several creative projects going on at once outside of work, along with work, family, social life, etc.  My physical fatigue has much to do with the narrowing down of all of these elements - but I've really been noticing the brain fatigue narrowing things even further and I've wondered what in the heck it means, and/or what to do about it.  It's so far beyond the occasional fibro fog days, and even on "good days" I don't function nearly at the same level I did only a couple years ago.  It may be the most depressing thing of all! 

All of the information and comments are so helpful - I'm really grateful! 

Lucy 

 

   

I was tested at the suggestion of my attorney when I was having trouble with my long term disability insurance. Since the testing proved a deficit from my former performance, it supported my insurance claim and they are now paying me regularly.

The only thing I can think about it relating to a divorce is if someone was trying to prove you could not care for children...that might be an issue.

I have been quite impressed with the use of Cellcept - apparently it is not often used for this particular symptom, my dr is a bit ahead of his time. Cellcept seemed to stop the progression and generate some improvement.

I agree with all of you - it's difficult to stay focused -- no radio playing in the background anymore, can't walk a grocery store isle and try to scan items too fast or get dizzy, think I'm going deaf when its really a focus issue....crazy-making symptoms!!!

I'm sorry you are having this problem, I have had it now for a long time. Iwas trying to do computer work, simple things and forgot what compuer I was working on and what I was doing. I am so forgetful sometimes it is dangerous, I burn things, ad its getting worse, then I have moments where I'm okay. Prednisone helps. In my case, I was told my brain damage, which still seems to be occurring had to do with my thyroid and endocrine problems and that it would probably be permanent. I thinkthat from pred and my already low cortisol, I am sort of low on pred normally. Even taking a small dose of pred helps me alot, in terms of energy and thinking. I lose some of my pot belly on it too.

So I think sometimes we also can become sort of naturally low on pred from being on it so much, I don't bounce back anymore ad get to where I cant stay awake. I saw a show on mystery diagnosis and the woman had Cushings and she had been "getting dumber" and barely gradulated college with help, and was falling asleep suddenly and her family had difficulty waking her. Finally they couldn't and they called an ambulance and she had had an addisonian crisis from cushings or something like that. I have been to the er and treatedfor addisonian crisis before.

You might try to make sure something else isn't wrong, likethyroid or endocrine, maybe make a case for some prednisone. Provigil is a non-steroid drug some docs prescribe to keep us going but it hadthe opposite effect on me and it made me incredibly tired. And its sort of like speed. So go figure.

Takecare and when you don't know what to draw, then maybe make a few lins and see what they look like? I'm sure they look great.