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Posted 2/19/2011 4:18 PM (GMT 0)
Anyone ever feel as if sometimes sensitive people take disease harder and thus suffer more.  I am an extremely sensitive person as was my mother.  Caring, considerate and a worrywart.  It seems like I get stepped on and hurt and while this has always been tough, it is so much more difficult since I have been sick with lyme. 

Anyone here not consider themself a sensitive person!  A rough, tough and ready type??  Just curious.  LOL. 

Posted 2/19/2011 7:10 PM (GMT 0)
I am a very sensitive person as well as my son. My husband has a good heart but things don't seem to bother him as much as us. We are all suffering with lyme disease and as a women I can tell you that the physical pain and emotion issues can be very intense. My pain and emotional issues compared to my husbands seems to be different. I have chronic pain all of the time where my husbands comes and goes. I believe this has something to do with a woman's hormones changing every month. My doctor even backed me up on this theory. Being with my husband for 25+ years has helped me to relax a little more and not sweat the small stuff. I always worried about everything. Not anymore. I used to have a lot more friends then I do now. I told the ones that didn't understand or take the time to be concerned about what we are going through to take a hike. Some of them I have known for 20 years. They just didn't seem to care about what we were dealing with. Trying to understand their lack of concern would cause me terrible stress and make my condition worse. I even have to avoid going to see relatives because they don't understand either. They look at you like your crazy or that you are doing this for attention. They to don't seem to care. I have had to distance myself from people that give me negativity or stress. It only makes me feel worse. You have to take care of yourself first. If the people around you don't understand or want to find out more of what you are going through then they aren't worth wasting your time with. I use to be a person that wanted to please everyone and make everyone happy before myself. Not anymore, it is me first along with my husband and son. If anything this health condition has really opened my eyes to the world around me. I see things so differently.
Posted 2/19/2011 9:29 PM (GMT 0)
Wow. You really hit the nail on the head for me. Had an exceptionally hard night last night. Tried to go out with friends and were told to meet at 7. Two of us couples met at 7 while the others all went out to dinner without us and showed up at 8:20. I was so hurt and humiliated that the lyme rage set in and I was up all night with chest pains. I just can't do it anymore. I've decided to distance myself. They are good people but just not compassionate and caring and I cannot deal with inconsiderate and rude at this time of my life. I too have always worried so much about hurting feelings while getting stepped on over and over again. While I know you need friends in your life and since my young son is friends with their friends, I certainly won't make any hurtful statements, just gonna say hello and smile and not socialize. Just can't do it anymore. Thanks for sharing.
Posted 2/19/2011 10:40 PM (GMT 0)
I can relate.

I am so sensitive that I feel GUILTY for being sick.  go figure.

I think the lyme can also make us much more touchy than we normally would be I know it can me.  I am working on it with Joyce Meyer's Power thoughts book.  I normally don't like self-help books but I wouldn't put this book in that category.   it is really phenomenol, perfect no, but i am getting a lot out of it including comfort as well as feeling better about myself.

have u had lyme rage?  It is awful the littlest things used to just set me off and this is not my normal personality, it has been almost non--existent for quite some time.  Thank God.

i think I'm feelin overly stressed (daughter needs a place to stay in Caifornia son is graduating with honors no job in sight, money is tighter than a stretched rubber band etc..   So maybe these things are contributing to my inc, sensitivity. i feel like hubby is getting sick of this.  Who wouldn't?  He does everything and maybe he is going to start or has already started to  resent it.  I have told him he does not have to stay, he idn't sign up for this. 

 

Posted 2/20/2011 1:04 PM (GMT 0)
You all need to destress your lives as best as possible. I have felt a lot better since I have said goodbye to friends and family that don't understand. It is better to get connected up with someone who understands what you have been going through. Some one who can relate. There are a lot of lyme communities where you can hook up with people, just look on line for one in your state. I too use to have a lot of lyme rage. Not anymore. Stress is the cause of the rage because it is to much for your body to handle.

Rosesinjanuary -Your husband did sign up for this. For better or worse. He married you because he loves you. It is rough going through this but I am sure you would do the same for him. You are letting your sensitivity get the better of you. You feel bad or guilty he has to do everything because you are ill. You need to communicate better with him during this rough time. Communication is the key to a long and healthy marriage regardless of an unexpected illness.

springsjean - When you distance yourself from these people they are going to wonder why. When and if they ask you need to be honest. I would tell them you are going through a lot of health issues because of lyme and are not able to pretend your not. You wouldn't be very good company. If they don't understand tell them to do research on lyme disease.
Posted 2/20/2011 3:44 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks donjoe. I plan on doing just that. I would never tell them they are being insensitive or inconsiderate because I realize some people just don't have the capability to understand these kind of things. I have told them how extensive my lyme illness is but they don't want to hear it. It is tough to say goodbye but I FINALLY realize it will be better for me in the long run. I have taken to loving my house, crocheting, reading, relaxing so that will help. I had my lyme rage totally under control and was feeling great until this recent episode of rudeness and humiliation. I gotta turn it into a positive and let it go so I don't focus and let it rip me apart.
Posted 2/20/2011 4:18 PM (GMT 0)
Sensitivity has always and still is a part of my name! HA.

Rose, I emailed you, are you doing ok? I hope you have a good day. Joyce M. has awesome books!

Spring: hubby and I went to church potluck and listened to a christian doctor speak, he doesn't believe in natural healings and most of his patients are successful with placebo. I didn't care for him much.
Yes, I also get tired and leave early when we attend events. Why go, I ask.

I've come to realize that no matter what illness it is (even cancer) people are self absorbed in their own lives. They care when you tell them at first, then it gets old. That's life I guess.

Donjoe, there are days that I wish I lived alone again, not because my hubby doesn't get it, he doesn't experience it. No one individual can become assessable to another human if they themselves have not encountered the same trials and pain. I don't like putting my spouse through it. I feel strong five minutes and a little weak the next.

This is truly a aweful illness! I remember when I first heard about it. Hum...... I said, that'll never happen to me!
Why? Because it's only in certain states! NOT! Never say never, cause you never know!

Well, just hoping everyone has a good day.

HH
Posted 2/20/2011 6:36 PM (GMT 0)
Donjoe
this is exactly what hubby says when i tell him he can leave i will understand. He says but I love u, go figure. In all honesty i do not know if I could play his role. I can just imagine what his family, my inlaws have to say about this.

Horse helperLOL my hubby has a chance? of moving some planes this week and I actually look forward to him leaving. i do not know why, Probably lots of reasons.

springsjean i did the hello how are u and did not go out thing too. , One, i was too tired, two it wasn't worth the stress. u must have a younger children i hope u don't have a lot of school related activities, those were a challenge and i am enjoying the age mi kids are except the worry. My son is driving home and we have a winter storm warning, ice,// I have tried calling and hubby is trying to text.
Posted 2/20/2011 6:43 PM (GMT 0)
HorseHelper - I guess I am fortunate. My best friend who is my husband suffers from lyme also. We understand what the other is going through. We had in the past before we new it was lyme, many rough years. We almost seperated many times until we realized there was something more then just stress causing us our health problems. Our anger and emotions at that time was very difficult to control. Now with treatment and understanding more about lyme, we are much happier then we have been in a long time even with all the pain. I almost lost my best friend many times. I am lucky that we loved each other enough to figure things out. I understand what you are going through and I am sorry. You are correct about how people respond to someone with a severe illness. It is a shame that people don't open their hearts as much as their wallets when a person is ill. I hope you know that you always have people here that understand and can help you through the rough times. I wish you and everyone here better days ahead.
Posted 2/20/2011 9:51 PM (GMT 0)
roses, I do have a 6th grader and yes the school events are difficult.  Why I don't know but I've gotten to the point where I wait in the car to pick him up now. Seems so juvenile but just easier.  I used to have to take a 1/2 xanax just to go to a basketball game where I know and love most of the members of our small town. 

My husband is also my best friend but I worry about him.  He won't get tested for lyme but has more and more symptoms everyday.  He attributes them to "getting old."  I don't harp on him cause it will just cause him more stress.  I thank god for him though.  He has really been through the ringer with me as the worst of my symptoms was by far anxiety and mood swings, at least for him to deal with. 

Still trying to figure out how I am going to maneuver this "dropping" of friends without them thinking (1) I am nuts and/or (2) I am simply "pissed" at the last episode.  Oh well, what do I care - it's the least of my worries right?

 

Posted 2/22/2011 4:38 AM (GMT 0)
Donjoe,

I read info sheet about Lyme to spouse, and got a wonderful, compassionate response. I believe he's really starting to understand. It's important to have the one you live with to understand, it makes it easier.

We, together, will work it out. He prays daily for me, he told me.

HH
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