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Posted 4/5/2013 12:34 PM (GMT 0)
I'm sorry to come on here to whine again...

I feel like crap... I don't want to speak to anyone (don't answer phonecalls, go offline on Skype, go offline on FB, go offline on gmail). 1 friend wanted to see me this week, but I had to go to her house, I said I couldn't because I'm too tired, she doesn't like to leave her house cause she hates driving. She wants to Skype, I just don't cause she's down lately, and I can't have that with all of my own worries.

I haven't been eating something descent in 2 days (appetite is totally gone, even my taste is down), I'm angry at husband.

Frustrated cause I'm off for 1 week, and I only came out of the house for 3 hours yesterday, that's all. I just did a grocerie at 150meters from our house and I'm so tired because of that. No fun at all, not even cosiness. Don't want to go to work next week.

I have to go and see my dr on Thursday, don't even want to see him either.

I need sun and happy times...

Posted 4/5/2013 1:59 PM (GMT 0)
Well, Marie,

A bit of sun would do us all good!

I'm off school,too and I'm sick of freezing German weather.Has somebody cancelled spring and forgot to tell me?

In my humble Uriah Heep opinion,we all need a pick up and something to look forward to,wouldn't a warm sunny day be wonderful?

I,too have spent the day dozing on the sofa with my dogs,I've got a thousand things to do and I just don't give a monkey's......and I'm certainly not as ill as you.

Sooooooooo,if you don't feel like doing anything,so be it,don't beat yourself up,it's your break,you can chose.

I'm trying to motivate myself into going for a walk with my doggies but looking outside at this grayness makes me want to go back to my sofa.

Spring will lift our spirits! if it ever arrives.

Chin up Marie smilewinkgrin

Tickled
Posted 4/5/2013 2:02 PM (GMT 0)

I have been thinking idea ??????

I made some changes this last week:

  • I started taking organic virgin coconut oil: 1-1,5 teaspoon per day
  • I started detoxing with bentonite clay and psyllium

Could I be feeling depressed because of this?

I'm also getting cold sores and the scar that's left from shingles hurts and itches (scar itself + the waist area that was affected)...
Eczema is also very bad at this moment...

Posted 4/5/2013 2:03 PM (GMT 0)
Marie- I hear you honey! This disease is so hard. I have been feeling down too- I think it is part of the disease. Try and go easy on yourself and accept that it is OK to feel that way. Is there anything that brings you pleasure (reading, TV, knitting). Try and do those things and accept, accept, accept. It is really hard to do, but I know that I am the hardest on myself and the bottom line is that I don't want this illness and I want to be able to enjoy life and so I am mad at myself, frustrated. Try and be grateful for some things in your life.

I feel like all I do is whine too, but the support we get from here is tremendous and helps me through some dark times. Know that this bad feeling too shall pass - it may not be perfect, but it WILL get better. Sometimes you have to grit your teeth and just get through these tough times...I know it sucks, but hang in there!

Sun would definitely help....thoughts of peace and light sending to you...
Posted 4/5/2013 2:18 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Tickled for your kindness
It's horrible outside, cold with a freezing wind - I think that the sofa is the safest place to be today, with the warmth and the love of your dogs...  I had a lovebird before who would always keep me company, I had him for more than 17 years, he was like an accessory, he trusted me more than anything else, always stuck to me - he died last year and I miss him on moments like these. Back then I would sometimes get irritated cause he wouldn't leave me alone :-)

Thank you Shadow, I really need to keep in mind that it'll pass too... my drawing block has been laying next to me this whole week - haven't touched it. Don't know why I'm so down - most of the time it comes and goes, but it feels really deep this time.

 

Posted 4/5/2013 3:07 PM (GMT 0)
Hello everyone. On Wed. I had one of my darkest days-- ever. It was bad. My moments like this come and go but as you say Mariel, this felt deep. I went to the acupuncturist yesterday and cried my eyes out and he said, 'I know how you are feeling before you even get here based on the weather'. Where I am we have had fits and starts of spring, but the cold has stuck around a lot this week. He said the spring is trying to come and the atmospheric changes are going to affect my body and mind. He said (for me) the summer will be good for me because my ailments are aggravated by cold, damp weather.
That made me feel better because really, sometimes I feel like I'm going insane. I'm not myself, I don't feel right in my own skin. I don't want to see people, go anywhere or do anything. If it weren't for my kids I'd be in bed every day. I just know it. But somehow him telling me that made me feel better. Like there is a reason. I'm not just going to lose my mind to Lyme disease--this will pass. After my treatment I felt a lot better. I'm still a little bit stuck today but I'm fighting it. It's hard. I'm sick to DEATH of this medicine and all the supplements and the research and the money(!!) being spent on getting rid of this. But I can't give up. I don't want my kids to see that their mother just gives up when it gets tough.

At any rate. Someone on here once told me when I get like that to just remind myself that it's the 'disease talking' and not to let it win. That helps too. I hope everyone can feel a little better today so you can be reminded that it will pass...
Posted 4/5/2013 4:13 PM (GMT 0)
Shabbychic,

sometimes you just need someone to comfort you, even if it's just saying that what you feel is normal.

Sometimes, when I'm at my lowest, I think 'maybe those drs were right, it's all in my head' - I know that it's not the case, but those infections are really messing with your mind...

I too hope that the people on here, and myself are heading for better times...

thanks for your input

Posted 4/5/2013 6:49 PM (GMT 0)
It kind of seems like all of us are having a rough week. I ham in terrible pain, so much so I cried today. It's horrible, people try to give me advice like family, and I want to tell them to shut up.

I am just irritated to be around people I think. I really feel this Lyme gets in our heads, and makes us feel this way, because I was a person that loved to me outside around people, now just the thought puts me in panic mode.

I hope someday soon we have a cure. best of luck all of you today.

justme
Posted 4/5/2013 8:40 PM (GMT 0)
Cheer up everybody. Keep in mind that you are at your low point now. It gets better from this point on! I know that it is easy for me to say! If it would make you feel better, you can throw rotten tomatoes and eggs at me.

Don
Posted 4/5/2013 9:18 PM (GMT 0)
Shabbychic, you're right! During the really down times, it is the disease talking! Lyme depression is well known for a reason!

I just got back from my first acupuncture appt in over 9 weeks and my doc was telling me the same thing about spring weather bouncing around and affecting us! :-) She also told me to not get in a hurry to do a liver cleanse though! LOL!! smilewinkgrin I've gotten too run down to do that to my body right now - oops!



Marie, hang in there! As I said, at least part of that is the Lyme talking! Be sure you stay very warm, and drink warm drinks in between your glasses of water to help keep your body temp up, lots of times our body temps go down and we feel 'down' as well.

Also, be sure to take several really deep breathes throughout the day - it's amazing, but somehow with this disease, we have a tendency to not breath very deeply, and so we don't get the oxygen to our brain and other parts of our bodies like they need. This can lend a hand on that 'down' feeling.

As others have said, don't beat yourself up for not wanting to go out and do things and visit with others! If you had the flu even, everyone would understand!! You are still ill, so don't feel like you have to act like you aren't ill. If they don't understand that you are ill and feel ill, then don't worry about them and how they feel when you tell them no.
Posted 4/5/2013 9:21 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Marie,

gentle hugs, I was thinking if a SAD lamp is out of range , I did not look online to price them)

then some color, maybe a piece of bright yellow material in one room

I have some wall art, that I just took down

( if u want, email me, and I could send them to u, )

take heart
Posted 4/5/2013 9:23 PM (GMT 0)
Wow, it does feel like we are all feeling the same way this week, maybe it does have something to do with the weather. I can see how people end their lives sometimes, that is how I felt earlier this week. It did pass a little and that's why we know it does ebb and flow a little. I am doing this for everyone in my family and me!!

Yes, the "disease talking" is a good way to look at it and to remember to have small and realistic goals for healing from this. Sometimes it feels like this has been going on for years, but it has been a short time in the grand scheme of things...
Posted 4/5/2013 10:08 PM (GMT 0)

Traveler,

I'm indeed very cold all the time (and then all of a sudden very hot for a short while) - I wear skisocks all the time, my feet stay cold even after a hot foot bath...

The breathing is also a problem... I have bad air hunger lately. Husband asks me all the time to breath calmly... I need to do the breathing excercices my ostheopath gave me...

It's the disease talking - I don't have this sad depressed character, I'm more the laughing type of person...

Thank you all for your concern, you're all very kind - I hope we'll all do better soon...

 

Posted 4/5/2013 11:33 PM (GMT 0)
I have felt the same way this week. It is not a very nice Spring in Minnesota. It is cold and right now it is snowing! I feel trapped in the house.

I went up higher on my dosage of Ceftin and I am herxing. This med has definately brought out a lot of the emotional feelings that are very hard to deal with. I hope this is the worse before better part. I keep telling myself this too shall pass. Also looking back I am making progress even though it seems so slow.

I am a very social person as well. I love to be active and around people, and lately I just don't have the motivation to be around anyone. Why is that? I really enjoyed some family time last week though with Easter. I know that I appreciate spending time with my family and friends, because I have had too many months of being sick and housebound!

Hope everyone has a better days ahead :)
Posted 4/7/2013 12:49 AM (GMT 0)
How are you feeling today, Marie? You've been on my mind, even though I got incredibly busy today.
Posted 4/7/2013 8:00 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Marie,

I hope you're feeling better today. I was just thinking today about how I simply can't be myself lately.theists to be fun...the person that cheered everyone up...or at least tried. I'm like you now, I don't answer the phone, I don't want to go in public. I have so much anxiety over the fact that a look sickly. I know it sounds vain, but I know if I felt better I could at least make myself look presentable!!

It's definitely the disease talking. When I am feeling down I try to accept it now. I'll put on my pj's (if I'm not already wearing them), and let myself feel whatever I'm feeling. I take a break and watch reality tv or a good movie to distract me from everything, and remember that it will pass.

My husband thinks I'm bi-polar because my moods change so drastically and so quickly. When I remind him it's the disease he says I try to blame everything on my illness. Well, I kinda do...but only because I know that's the truth, that this isn't me. This disease changes so much for us, does it not?

I really hope today is better for you. Hang in there, and remember you will get through it!! :-)
Posted 4/7/2013 8:06 AM (GMT 0)
How good it is that you're back again,I was worried about you!

Have you noticed any progress?

Tickled
Posted 4/7/2013 10:29 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Traveler,
Thank you for thinking about me.
I got out of the house yesterday - we took the car and drove the 45 mins to the coast and had a very short walk (300m), it was freezing cold with a mean wind, but the sun was out there. I did some deep breathing, sat close to the water on the breakwater (that always calms me down) - I don't feel very well, but it did me good to be in the wind close to the water (meanwhile husband was doing his running in the sand)

Lymer!!
I too have been thinking of you, good to see you here again - how are you doing??

Posted 4/7/2013 9:02 PM (GMT 0)
Hugs to you Marie. It's spring time here and I'm stuck in the house because of an allergic reaction/herx due to Milk Thistle. I was so hype about going out today but I have to remember as you should that we are alive and breathing. This too shall pass...I keep believing in a miracle for us all and that it will travel to all of us so we are healed.

Relax today and if you don't feel like doing anything then don't.

Blessings to you.
Posted 4/8/2013 5:11 AM (GMT 0)
Hey MarieLS,

The lyme can really worsen the eczema and cold sores. My daughter had the cold sores, L-lysine worked incredibly for that! Since she has been on it, she hasn't had 1 in 2 years. Otherwise she had at least 2 a month! L-Lysine is great for the skin, may help other problems as well. I had problems with acne because of the lyme, and I think it helped a lot to clear it up. I was off it for one week because I ran out, and I got 3 HUGE cystic pimples. Within days of taking the l-lysine, they were gone..

Try it out! Hope it helps. I hope you are feeling a litle brighter!

Samantha
Posted 4/8/2013 8:56 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you Samantha, I'll look into L-lysine - the earlier affected shingles area is really tender and painful this last week, I hope it won't be showing up again (I once had the 'normal' form, and once the subcutaneous form).

Wryter, I hope the Milk Thistle herx goes soon...
Posted 4/8/2013 7:16 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Marie, I'm starting to feel better but gee whiz! Now I know to read the labels and do more research on what's in the ingredients :(

Samjones thanks for the skin advice, my eczema is on fire on my hands :( I might try some of that too!

Feel better!
Posted 4/10/2013 6:22 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Marie,

How are you doing?

The weather here Germany is changing rapidly,are you coping,pain wise?

Tickled
Posted 4/10/2013 7:28 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Tickledpink,

Thank you for your concern blush

Honestly, I'm doing so and so. I'm very tired, my head and joints hurt the most and I'm still nauseous, no appetite. My biggest complaint now is that I still feel very down - this is not me.

The weather is dark and damp yesterday and today, but less cold (there was sun at the coast on Saturday, so we drove up there and had a short walk, that was good). They're predicting 20° spring weather for Sunday/Monday though!!! That's something to look forward to :-) !!!!

I'm back at work, so lots of stress, but I can't afford to sit home - I think it would only make me feel more down.

I'm seeing my dr tomorrow morning... I'm very curious about the bloodwork results and about his reaction on the high cortisol levels that I have in the morning, and the thyroid matter... I hope he'll be more communicative than last time...

How are you???

Marie

Posted 4/10/2013 7:49 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks for asking :-)

I'm OK pain wise but I'm like a packet of Rice Crispies ! full of snap, crackle and pop.

Tickled
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