Shopping for doctors, tips needed

Hi Folks,

I'm a newbie today.

First of all, I'd love some tips on ways that you shop for doctors. The reason I can't just rely on word-of-mouth is because the kind of doc I want is kinda rare, at least here. Do you interview them first?? If so, how so? Do you just spell it out or just see how it goes?

It's really hard, so far, for me to find primary care docs who practice integrative medicine. I've found and met two and had mixed to somewhat bad experiences. Main thing is it would make it much easier if the primary care doc isn't put off by my Lyme doc.

This has GOT to be a common problem, right?

I'm very happy with my Lyme doc, but he likes his patients to have primary care docs. Been in the process of shopping for a Primary Care doc more open to alternatives, integrative docs.

The first one was a bit off-putting, guess uncomfortable that I wanted to learn more about him and made a crack about it being like on a first date. Then, without any real lead-in that I recall, he asked if I'd been sexually abused. I haven't but it seemed insensitive to me--impersonal like he's checking out a theory (like all F/M patients were sexually abused, say.) Especially because I hadn't even decided if I was going to become his patient.

The second one:
A couple of days ago, I traveled 1-1/2 hrs to see a new doc (MD, early 30's, who describes herself as integrative (open to alternative healing arts). Anyway, on paper she looked great but she was SO irritable with me!! And she teaches meditation. I wish I knew why, but I can only guess. She for sure didn't agree with my doc's prescribing Heparin, but why act offended by that. It's not like he gave her Heparin!

To me it just feels more professional if they try to politely conceal or control their irritation, at least for the first visit.
I can only guess why. I didn't say anything offensive

Would you go back and give it another try or just bail out? I could ask her to explain what was irritating her? Or, just overlook it.

And, on an emotional level, it's SO disappointing to expose myself to what I call ridicule when the doc seems sarcastic or irritable and makes certain comments that make me wonder if they believe in my illness.

Thanks for anyone sticking with me to the end!

All reactions OK.
Cynthia

Hi Cynthia,

I hear you. It sounds like you're doing the right things. Are you comfortable sharing where you are located? Maybe someone has a recommendation.

Hi All-

I’m looking for a LLMD or integrative MD to get as a primary care provider in the greater Seattle area. Not afraid to travel to find a humble (can admit they don’t know something, not on a power ego trip, openminded).

I know this is a tall order, but my Lyme doc is like that, so I’m “spoiled” now, so to speak. And, I hate to settle for less!

Cynthia