Lyme and Friends

Hi twinmkm, When I got sick, my friends started to distance themselves from me because either I could not "hang out" like I used to, they were afraid to get infected from me, or they didn't want to have a sick friend.

You see, now that I am sick, I can no longer stay out late. I have to be in bed by 9:00AM or the next few days I feel miserable. I can't drink any more so hanging out is harder. I also have a very restricted diet so I can't go eat out with them.

I also don't tolerate loud noises so watching a game with people screaming at the TV is also out.

So now, I only have one friend out of many that I had before. This friend has always been there for me, tolerates my moodiness, my good and bad days and puts up with a lot. I guess she has no choice since she also happens to be my wife.

It is hard to keep friends when your life changes so much. At the same time, it makes you see life in a whole new point of view. I am now a more gentle and caring person, I now treasure each day and don't waste time worrying about things that I can't control. I am more compassionate for people who are also in need.

As for school, perhaps you should look into online classes. This way you stay in school and you have something to think about other than this miserable illness.

Hi Twin,

I'm really sorry to hear that you've had to deal with so much disappointment. It is really really hard to lose friends or be let down by them and see another side to them.

I wonder if you can find a support group to attend in person? Even if you can't find one specifically for Lyme, others in similarly isolating situations that have joined a group can help you feel connected. There are lots of cancer groups, grief groups, and even church groups that can be really uplifting.

Also, you might consider taking your basic college courses online, just to have something to do and make some forward progress with school. These would be the usual English 101, Math 101, History 101, etc., that all colleges require. That could help you feel like you are accomplishing something while you wait for the time that you can attend in person. It will also give you access to a wider circle of friends online, even though they will be virtual at first.

Good luck! Please do keep us posted!

Maui

Based on the recent posts on loneliness, that seems like it could be really beneficial. I doubt that it's forbidden, but of course you want to be really careful like you said. (However, I doubt there are weirdo trolls taking the time to join this forum for this purpose, lol!) I also noticed that some people here do direct message and then seem to friend each other on Facebook. That may be another way to get to know more people, as well as about the person before trying to meet up in person.

I wish we could put our pictures on here to match faces with all of our creative names. ;-)

I'm sorry that you're feeling so lonely and isolated. It's great that you're able to connect on here - I like a lot of the suggestions you were given. Have you ever been in any kind of a support group, a women's group at a church or another group at a community club? Any kind of group that you can attend when you feel up to it. Or even a local charity where you can volunteer every few weeks or once a month? There really are a lot of people who would welcome a caring person in their lives - even on an infrequent basis. :)

FreeButterfly70

iLyme: Yes, I have been sick for almost exactly six years (I remember being in a lot of pain during Thanksgiving). I just saw an LLMD about two and a half weeks ago and I go again the first week in December (I think). And I do live in Lancaster and Dr. N is who I am currently seeing, but in the past I have seen an orthopedic surgeon, three ER doctors, two Rheumatologists, two Gastroenterologists, two Neurologists, a Pediatrician (several times), and my current family doctor (again several times) for problems related to Lyme (I just didn't realize they were related then). I also saw an allergist and an Ear, Nose, and Throat doctor because I always feel congested and my skin is very itchy all the time, but I am not sure if that is Lyme related or not. I was in seventh grade (13 years old) when I started getting pain in my right knee. That same year I got mono and the pain spread to the rest of my body and when I went to high school I started having a lot of other strange symptoms.