A bit of humorous distraction... got one to share?

A Freudian Slip is when you say one thing and mean your mother...

*

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?
Someone who lays awake at night wondering if there is a dog....

*

Knock knock
Who's there?
Olive
Olive who?
Olive my jokes are as bad as this one.

Lol-love the dog one!

Oh--I can share this--Today I was in the car & on the Satellite comedy station, a guy said (from my bad joke memory, mind you, but shocked the subject!), "With my wife & I the only foreplay these days is checking for ticks. We stand on the front porch, she combing my body, & I, hers. My neighbors look over & think we are getting kinky...Well, truth be told, I'd rather have an STD, than Lyme!"

god I love that dog joke ahaahahahahahah

My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

*

Mom: get up Liam, you will be late for school
Liam: but I don't wanna go, all the teachers and students hate me
Mom: you have to go
Liam: give me one reason why I should go
Mom: you're the principal

*

I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.