It's very tough. I know where you're coming from.
I wouldn't say that I am healed, or anywhere near as close to it as I'd like to be, but I have managed to push away a few of the nastier symptoms from being constants in my life, and am in a position where, for the most part, my infections are being kept stagnant. There are things keeping me from doing any more healing, which I'm trying to figure out.
Though, I don't mean to make this about
me - I'm just trying to tell you that I used to be there, and I still get there, sometimes. I don't the bank account to support being able to see literate doctors, pharmaceutical medications, or a variety of alternative treatment methods. I'm all on my own, supported by my grandmother, and have about
$600 - $800 a month to spend on medicines. That may seem like a lot, but when you buy herbs and oils, there's $400 gone. Throw in a few supplements and high quality probiotics, there goes the rest.
But, you know, what I'm trying to say is that persistence and experimentation are just as much a part of trying to get better as money and access to doctors and whatnot. Try this, try that, etc. Pick yourself up, every time you fall. Scrape myself off the pavement, ten thousand times over. Whenever you see me, I'm riding a wave, being swept out to sea, or crawling back to shore, gasping for air, yet again escaping the waters that sought to swallow me from this world. This, right now, what you are experiencing, while my words might not prove to inspire you, know that it is a part of your path to recovery: being broken, then learning how to rebuild yourself again.
It's like Traveler said, if you plan on giving up, while I am not trying to encourage that, plan on dying, because it's just going to take more and more of your mind, body, and soul away from you. You will lose more, you will suffer more. So, as troubled as you have been in living with the sicknesses and in trying to treat them, keep going. Don't waste any time being down, beaten. That's what the Lyme wants. You're gonna get back up, sooner or later, so make it sooner. Pick yourself up off the mat, and keep swinging.
Me, I still fall, every day. There are energies within that tell me, "you can't do it." But, **** that. I'm gonna try to perfect my current protocols, save money to see a doctor, and keep pressing on. If I can't do it, I don't know, because I haven't given it all I've got yet. If I won't get better, I don't know, because I haven't lived the future yet. Things might change for me, for you, for all of us, sometime within the next couple years. I just don't know. So, I'm gonna keep at it, just like you should.
I used to be that guy. Screw trying to get better, screw life, it's hopeless. Take your hope and positivity, and shove it up your butt, because they aren't gonna do a darn thing to heal my ailments. Those are the sorts of things I used to say. King of Negativity.
I like me a lot better now, and I am doing a lot better in life, and I wouldn't say that is because I have healed all that much, at least not in terms of my physical illnesses. Harder to heal, if you're telling yourself, "no," right along with the Lyme.
But, like I said, this is a part of getting better - everyone goes through this phase, and everyone *eventually* learns how to conquer it. Now, maybe not entirely - I told you, I still fall, but at least to the degree in which they learn how to get up and brush themselves off that much quicker.
Oh, and I almost forgot, I'm also here to say: try essential oils. Look up information here on the forum, and consider joining a Facebook group called Essential Oils and Lyme, as they've a protocol posted to their group's page. They're godsends. Haven't cured me or anything, but, again, some things have left, and I am keeping my condition from worsening, and am in a position to get better, if I can put other pieces of the puzzle together.
Sadly, that's how it is, hardly ever just one antibiotic, one combination of herbs, etc. Many things, all needing to be put together in the right order. That may be disheartening, but it's a reality we have to face. If health were easy, none of us would be here right now.
I'm gonna be a winner, one day. Taken a life's worth of losses, and surely take a few more, but I'm gonna score a couple points in between. You, too, if you keep trying for it.
Post Edited (NotQuiteAntonio) : 12/20/2016 11:18:10 AM (GMT-7)