Anyone experience symptoms that make you feel almost dead inside and mentally

Hi all,

I haven’t been on in quite a while and to be honest we were focusing so much on mast cell and mold poisoning....and other issues....that I thought Lyme was least of my worries. Anyways, I wanted to see if you all ever have the extreme brain like psychological symptoms of derealization and I guess some what depression? I have anxiety symptoms always from trauma from hospital and ambulances and abandoning my little girl way too early in life if this disease keeps progressing. I am too sick to do any treatments and I am very deficient in vitamin B1 and folic acid....I started up on a Vit B1 supplement very slowly earlier this week. Anyways, just wondering if anyone ever gets the horrible is this reality and is this really my life depression symptoms? I have been so strong through all of this, but I honestly and so nervous now that I will never get my joy or love back....I feel literally dead inside and then so tired and nauseous and diarrhea...wondering if it could be a herx from doing oxygen therapy with last week when I had a 26 hour migraine.

Any thoughts or help would be so appreciated. With Love

Leah

Aerose91 is another member with derealization. Check out some of his posts.

I describe it as feeling empty inside, like my personality taken, sometimes I say feel like a zombie(or what I perceive a so called zombie represent).

No real solution sadly. For the longest time I just endured, it is very hard, many times just pretending for the benefit of others. The old fake it til you make it. I do have times where it has subsided but it is frustrating when it is prominent symptom. Something that i started last year (low dose Adderral) helps me be more functional(less brain fog, focus, less overall physical discomfort) but I don't think it helps emptiness save I can feel better just because I'm able for period time to get tasks done. Sorry wish I had a solution, it can be frustrating and sad to feel empty, I hope that gets better for you .

Aerose, checking in-

Hi Leah, I'm sorry you're dealing with derealization, it's the most awful thing. Derealization/depersonalization have been my worst symptoms by far since the beginning. It feels like you have no soul, this unending nothingness and that you're trapped in a dreamworld. Like a parallel dimension to everyone else around you. So hard to articulate to even yourself, let alone others who don't have it

I have seen this most closely associated with bartonella but i think any of the infections can cause it. There's no way you're going to stay like this- as soon as you forge through treatment it will all be back to normal. I read a story by Stephen Buhner where he explained working with someone with DP/DR very bad and suicidal rage. He said within a year of herbal treatment with him she was back to normal

BTW, the full moon exacerbates everythng for me too

Post Edited (Aerose91) : 8/27/2018 3:48:10 PM (GMT-6)

Yes I had this problem.

I told my doctor "I feel like I am dying" -- it was a totally real thought

The only solution was fasting for 3 days, reading books on CBT theraphy, and then reading KJV after I told my friend "Hey I feel better if I don't eat or 3 days", he told me, "Oh yeah that's in the Bible". I am not trying to promote anything on here just saying that it worked for me. CBT books and fasting should work just by themselves. But things got so bad with me I couldn't read straight so I would just sit and squeeze KJV, reading a few pages, and resting, and I am not even religious. It is just what worked for me.

Aerose91,
I am so sorry to hear that! For me it was, by far, my worse symptom.
It went away very slowly over the course of a year. But everyone is different.
Many of my symptoms involved the brain and my LLMD went after the brain to heal it.

Sometimes I can feel it coming on especially in stores with lots of stimuli and lights.

I used abx including mycobutin, azithromycin, mino and tinidazole with herbals including lemon oil, saspiralla, LB protocol (has a lot of things but must notably Japanese knotweed). I also used fish oil and very very low sugar diet, still do.

The best thing I used for detox was exercise, more specifically weight training.
I also used:
sauna, Epson salt baths and activated charcoal as a binder.

Started taking Red Sage. Not sure if it will help with the `feel empty inside, no personality, a walking shell`.

Btw, like the new HW interface so far.