Suicidal with Bart symptoms/Dry eyes

Rsmithy said...
Hi...

I'm not much of someone for forums, but I'm in so much despair right now I don't know what to do...and need some reassurance/advice.

I got better from Lyme up until about a year and a half ago....when I returned to work and had a horrible Bartonella relapse after an accident.

I've since had some really horrible neurological symptoms, cognition issues and alot of other random things - mainly with my brain though.

about a few months ago I walked in a branch and scratched my right eye, and it took about a month to recover from that...all the while I was using eye drops etc I didn't particularly want to use to help my eye heal fully.

After using these eye drops for an extended amount of time though, I noticed once I stopped them, my eye became extremely dry and it wasn't really relubricaring itself.

Everyone kept telling me it was the infection, but I tried explaining that it had never happened prior to me using the drops etc in my eye...so that wouldnt make much sense.

Fast forward to the other day....I got some olive oil and tobassco sauce in my other eye, which was making me paranoid....so I poured aload of water in the eye to help flush it out (Probably about half a litre or more).

Once I was done....my left eye also became dry!

It has been days since and it hasn't been relubricating itself since.

I'm extremely suicidal and I honestly don't have a clue what to do.

Ive been fighting so hard for my life for this passed 3 years with Lyme, and now a year and a half with Bartonella.

All the symptoms and things that have been happening have been just been making me so depressed.

Has any one has this happen to them with Bartonella/Lyme and how did they get things back?

I'm currently now on a combo of antibiotics and herbs because herbs alone weren't doing anything this time around.

Has anyone had really extreme dry eyes from Bartonella, and if so how did things get better? Is this the infection causing this?

My practioner said it's nothing to do with the infection and I've just dried it out with water....which has put even more fear into me!!!!! I don't know what to do?

(Please only positivity or help because I'm in a real fragile state of mind right now)

Also I did see my eye specialist a while back and he said there was nothing wrong with me eyes. (This was before they started feeling dry)

I had the dry eye thing for a few years, it felt like my eyes were on fire literally. Felt like a long day at the beach laying in the sun. My doc said all was okay and didn't care much. This was before my lyme and Bart diagnosed. Bartonella causes the eye problems a lot especially burning or dry eyes, conjunctivitis etc. Now I found out my "dry eyes" are caused by adrenal fatigue.

“Has anyone had really extreme dry eyes from Bartonella, and if so how did things get better? Is this the infection causing this?”

Prior to diagnosis I had red eyes from early teenage years.
And it continued.
I finally started using eye drops (Genteal) every day and it helped some.

I don’t have it anymore.
I think I possibly had Lyme and CO’s as a young child (I had many many cat scratches over the years - so possibly had Bartonella from that.

I don’t have dry, red eyes anymore.

Possibly (likely?) treating Bartonella has resolved it.

Hi there,

Thank you for your reply.

What is it that actually helped solve it? Has it actually gone back to normal now?

Was yours extreme?

Much love,

Ryan

Hello, Ryan:

Welcome to the forum. We're glad you found us.

My primary concern is that you mentioned being suicidal. Obviously, that's very serious. I encourage you to please do one of the following:

• Call or text the "988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline" at 988. (Website: https://988lifeline.org) The Lifeline provides 24-hour, confidential support to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress.
  
• Go (or, have a family member or friend take you) to your nearest hospital emergency room.
  
• Call 911, if you need help to come to you.

As for your eye issues, I'm very sorry for the suffering you're experiencing and what you've been through up until this point. That sounds like a lot of pain, frustration, and uncertainty that you've endured, on top of everything else you're handling. But, aside from the physical, there's the mental and emotional strain. That's a lot.

I agree with your practitioner that flushing your eyes with plain water could cause it to be irritated. But, that's a temporary event, while your body adjusts to lubricate your eye. It's not a problem to flush our eyes with water, provided the water is clean. Consider that people frequently swim in chlorinated pools, lakes, rivers, and oceans with water getting into their eyes without any major problems. My eyes would be red and sting for a while, when swimming in chlorinated pools as a kid and opening my eyes underwater.

Anyway, is your practitioner a medical doctor? If so, is this person your primary care doctor?

If the answer to either question is "No," do you have a primary care physician you can consult? Ideally, you would see an Ophthalmologist and get a thorough examination, consultation, and recommendations.

While this may not be true for you, I suffer from being in my head too much and sometimes my thoughts begin spiraling and my anxiety flares-up. Then, when the anxiety begins, my body reacts with adrenaline, rapid breathing, increased heart rate and sweating. Then, my mind focuses on the physical symptoms I'm experiencing and that worries me more...fanning the flames of my anxiety even more.

When this happens, I sometimes have to remind myself that our bodies are remarkably resilient and have an amazing capacity and ability for healing and repair. And, that ability is innate in us -- it's built into our "operating system." I remember once having to remind myself: "My heart is fine, it knows what to do, and it's always working in the best interest of itself and the rest of the body. Its intrinsic wisdom, programming, and communication with all my other organs is working in perfect harmony on its own. There's nothing I need to do, other than to give it sleep nutrition, exercise, love, and appreciation."

Perhaps such self-talk isn't for everyone, but it's actually helped me in numerous situations, when my anxiety flared. Really, it's not a bad thing to acknowledge in good times, too. Our thoughts do affect our physiology, whether positive or negative.

Please do take care of yourself and consider the resources at the top of this post. Also, please feel free to keep posting, whether it's to ask questions or just share your thoughts and feelings. Lastly, I wish you luck in getting to the bottom of the matter and hope that you will keep us updated.

Best wishes,
The Dude

The Dude Abides said...
Hello, Ryan:

Welcome to the forum. We're glad you found us.

My primary concern is that you mentioned being suicidal. Obviously, that's very serious. I encourage you to please do one of the following:

• Call or text the "988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline" at 988. (Website: https://988lifeline.org) The Lifeline provides 24-hour, confidential support to anyone in suicidal crisis or emotional distress.
  
• Go (or, have a family member or friend take you) to your nearest hospital emergency room.
  
• Call 911, if you need help to come to you.

As for your eye issues, I'm very sorry for the suffering you're experiencing and what you've been through up until this point. That sounds like a lot of pain, frustration, and uncertainty that you've endured, on top of everything else you're handling. But, aside from the physical, there's the mental and emotional strain. That's a lot.

I agree with your practitioner that flushing your eyes with plain water could cause it to be irritated. But, that's a temporary event, while your body adjusts to lubricate your eye. It's not a problem to flush our eyes with water, provided the water is clean. Consider that people frequently swim in chlorinated pools, lakes, rivers, and oceans with water getting into their eyes without any major problems. My eyes would be red and sting for a while, when swimming in chlorinated pools as a kid and opening my eyes underwater.

Anyway, is your practitioner a medical doctor? If so, is this person your primary care doctor?

If the answer to either question is "No," do you have a primary care physician you can consult? Ideally, you would see an Ophthalmologist and get a thorough examination, consultation, and recommendations.

While this may not be true for you, I suffer from being in my head too much and sometimes my thoughts begin spiraling and my anxiety flares-up. Then, when the anxiety begins, my body reacts with adrenaline, rapid breathing, increased heart rate and sweating. Then, my mind focuses on the physical symptoms I'm experiencing and that worries me more...fanning the flames of my anxiety even more.

When this happens, I sometimes have to remind myself that our bodies are remarkably resilient and have an amazing capacity and ability for healing and repair. And, that ability is innate in us -- it's built into our "operating system." I remember once having to remind myself: "My heart is fine, it knows what to do, and it's always working in the best interest of itself and the rest of the body. Its intrinsic wisdom, programming, and communication with all my other organs is working in perfect harmony on its own. There's nothing I need to do, other than to give it sleep nutrition, exercise, love, and appreciation."

Perhaps such self-talk isn't for everyone, but it's actually helped me in numerous situations, when my anxiety flared. Really, it's not a bad thing to acknowledge in good times, too. Our thoughts do affect our physiology, whether positive or negative.

Please do take care of yourself and consider the resources at the top of this post. Also, please feel free to keep posting, whether it's to ask questions or just share your thoughts and feelings. Lastly, I wish you luck in getting to the bottom of the matter and hope that you will keep us updated.

Best wishes,
The Dude

The Dude Abides

Thank you for your response. And everyone else aswell.

I have been told that about going into water etc to swim without goggles....and that is ok.

But I was just concerned that maybe where I had constantly poured so much water in, the eye had suddenly been knocked out of whack and decided not to lubricate itself.

I thought maybe theres a difference between actually going into the water, and actually pouring it directly into the eye.

What do you think?

Could you give me some reassurance on this?

Much love,

Ryan x

Rsmithy said...
I have been told that about going into water etc to swim without goggles....and that is ok.

But I was just concerned that maybe where I had constantly poured so much water in, the eye had suddenly been knocked out of whack and decided not to lubricate itself.

I thought maybe there's a difference between actually going into the water, and actually pouring it directly into the eye.

What do you think?

Could you give me some reassurance on this?

Howdy, Ryan:

Okay, I see what you mean. It's a good question. While I'm not medically-trained, I don't think you have any reason to worry that flushing your eyes with water.

The reason I believe this to be true is because there are many hundreds (likely thousands) of products that consumers buy that have instructions on the label about what to do if the product gets into the consumer's eyes. More often than not, the instructions are to flush the eyes with water -- usually for several minutes.

Have a look at the many different types of eye wash stations available:

https://www.google.com/search?q=eye+wash+stations&source=lnms&tbm=isch

The ones that are not attached to plumbing have an onboard reservoir to hold solution. According to OSHA and ANSI requirements, these:

"Must be filled with a saline solution or one that contains a bacteriostatic agent to prevent the growth of bacteria, fungus, algae, and acanthamoeba. Water should be changed every six months whether used or not."

However, the eye wash stations that are attached to the building's water supply use the same water that feeds sinks, water fountains, ice makers, etc. It's just plain water from the municipal supply.

In either case, the requirement about the eye station's water supply states:

"The water supply must be capable of supplying a large and continuous supply of potable water. At the very least, a unit should supply water for 15 minutes."

Therefore, in light of all of this -- and, due to my own personal experience -- I don't believe you have any reason to worry about having poured water directly into your eye to flush it.

Again, I think you might benefit from speaking to an Ophthalmologist, since they know all about the eye.

I hope this helps,

Dude

The Dude Abides said...

Rsmithy said...
I have been told that about going into water etc to swim without goggles....and that is ok.

But I was just concerned that maybe where I had constantly poured so much water in, the eye had suddenly been knocked out of whack and decided not to lubricate itself.

I thought maybe there's a difference between actually going into the water, and actually pouring it directly into the eye.

What do you think?

Could you give me some reassurance on this?

Howdy, Ryan:

Okay, I see what you mean. It's a good question. While I'm not medically-trained, I don't think you have any reason to worry that flushing your eyes with water.

The reason I believe this to be true is because there are many hundreds (likely thousands) of products that consumers buy that have instructions on the label about what to do if the product gets into the consumer's eyes. More often than not, the instructions are to flush the eyes with water -- usually for several minutes.

Have a look at the many different types of eye wash stations available:

https://www.google.com/search?q=eye+wash+stations&source=lnms&tbm=isch

The ones that are not attached to plumbing have an onboard reservoir to hold solution. According to OSHA and ANSI requirements, these:

"Must be filled with a saline solution or one that contains a bacteriostatic agent to prevent the growth of bacteria, fungus, algae, and acanthamoeba. Water should be changed every six months whether used or not."

However, the eye wash stations that are attached to the building's water supply use the same water that feeds sinks, water fountains, ice makers, etc. It's just plain water from the municipal supply.

In either case, the requirement about the eye station's water supply states:

"The water supply must be capable of supplying a large and continuous supply of potable water. At the very least, a unit should supply water for 15 minutes."

Therefore, in light of all of this -- and, due to my own personal experience -- I don't believe you have any reason to worry about having poured water directly into your eye to flush it.

Again, I think you might benefit from speaking to an Ophthalmologist, since they know all about the eye.

I hope this helps,

Dude

Hi again Dude,

Thank you again so much for your lengthy detailed reply! You have no idea how much it means to me when people like you help and reassure.

Yes everything you say is very true....I never thought it like that!

Still concerning....but you have really made a huge amount of sense.

Alot of people just say - "Oh don't worry. It'll be ok"....and when you're in a state of mind like this....even though it may be true, it really doesn't help at all because you're so full of fear.

But thank you for your reassurance.

I've spoken to my Dr today who has been treating me since the relapse....and he has said that I need just focus on treating and things will be ok and go back to normal.

Just to focus on getting rid of the infection.

I pray everyday and hope that things will return to normal and I will have my life back again.

In the meantime, yeah....replies and help/advice from people like yourself is really crucial for my mental state right now.

Much love,

Ryan x

Rsmithy,

When my symptoms were at their worst, I had extreme dry eyes and dry mouth along with many other symptoms. It was so bad that I was tested for Sjögren’s syndrome. I had antibodies, but they were below the lab range for a positive result. This was all before I knew I knew about Lyme and coinfections like bartonella.

Those symptoms were bad for months but improved after I moved out of my parents’ moldy house and in with a relative. It was at that point that I learned I had mold illness and Lyme.

I don’t recall any particular treatment helping those symptoms. As well as I remember, they improved before I started treating Lyme/co with Buhner’s herbal protocols.

I agree with the Dude about seeing an Ophthalmologist. Have you been examined by an eye doctor since injuring your eyes?

Post Edited (WalkingbyFaith) : 12/30/2022 6:52:32 PM (GMT-8)

I use Genteal eye drops - Usually twice a day.
My eyes aren’t dry/sore anymore but I still use them most days.
Can’t hurt.

“Thanks for the response.

Do you find your eyes are now automatically lubricating on their own now? Even if you don't use the drops?

I had an appointment with Dr the other day and he said it sounds like an autoimmune response from the bacteria....that will most definitely go after I get the bacteria out.

What are your thoughts?

Much love,

Ryan”


Sometimes I forget to use the drops and my eyes are fine - not dry.
I just keep using them - mostly out of habit… can’t hurt.
I do think it could be from the infection(s) - particularly Bartonella.

What may be contributing to my eyes not being so dry and red anymore is I have been treating Bartonella and am weaning off treatment - as I believe I’m in remission.

Girlie said...
“Thanks for the response.

Do you find your eyes are now automatically lubricating on their own now? Even if you don't use the drops?

I had an appointment with Dr the other day and he said it sounds like an autoimmune response from the bacteria....that will most definitely go after I get the bacteria out.

What are your thoughts?

Much love,

Ryan”


Sometimes I forget to use the drops and my eyes are fine - not dry.
I just keep using them - mostly out of habit… can’t hurt.
I do think it could be from the infection(s) - particularly Bartonella.

What may be contributing to my eyes not being so dry and red anymore is I have been treating Bartonella and am weaning off treatment - as I believe I’m in remission.

Hi Girlie,

Thanks for the prompt reply.

Do you think mine will be ok? With continued treatment?

It's like the only thing right now that is scaring me....along with my lack of cognition.

Oh that's really good news that you are feeling that much better.

You mention Ceftin in your description....did that help at all with neurological problems with you?

What do you find as helped the most in regards to with your brain along your journey?

Much love,

Ryan x

“Thanks for the prompt reply.

Do you think mine will be ok? With continued treatment?

It's like the only thing right now that is scaring me....along with my lack of cognition.

Oh that's really good news that you are feeling that much better.

You mention Ceftin in your description....did that help at all with neurological problems with you?

What do you find as helped the most in regards to with your brain along your journey?

Much love,

Ryan x

///////////////////////

I think if you continue to treat the infections - your symptoms should diminish.
Sometimes it’s possible we are left with residuals - if there is damage.

I think the mino might have had a big impact on my head issues because it is one of the best abx that gets to the brain.
It crosses the blood/brain barrier.
When I was taking the mino, I often felt it in my head and my head pressure increased.
It wasn’t pleasant - but if that what it takes to get rid of head symptoms - then it’s worth it IMO.