Posted 3/3/2016 7:38 PM (GMT 0)
I think by love they mean accept it. That is the stage I am in right now, I can't accept it. I have always been the kind of person that would get a cold or something and be better in two days. Or if I had a different issues I'd go to the Doctor get meds and the problem would be gone in less than a week.
The act of accepting that this is now the reality, is something that is so difficult. I watch or read stuff about people at the end of their journey with it feeling better, and I just want to be at that point but I guess one has to realize this is can be such a long road. I get so down thinking well this is it for the next 50 or so years I have ahead of me, no cure this is it!
I think somewhere along the way you realize how much you have learnt and the meaningful relationships you carved out of this pain and suffering and that is what you love, or how the illness revealed just how strong you are capable of being. But in the moment while you are living it, it is so hard.
I can't love it, I can't accept it, everyday is a rollarcoaster of emotions and symptoms and I just want to scream, laugh, cry, swear, run, and lay down and do nothing all at once.
Right now I hate this, will there be a light at the end of the tunnel, right now I don't know...well when it comes down to it what do we all have as human beings at our core: HOPE!
I am rooting for every single person fighting this disease. I hope you feel better soon, there has to be brighter days ahead.