Feeling lost, confused, anxious and just unwell

My pain level the last week has been off the charts. Shoulders, elbows, hands, wrists, fingers - all areas which are not usually affected. I'm chalking it up to the seasonal changes, as it's been getting a little better.
Today, though, I feel weak, achy, and very anxious. Like I may drop at any minute.

I'm going to up my detoxing, but I'm wondering if it's anxiety causing me to feel bad, or if the anxiety is the effect of feeling bad and pushing myself.....I'm wondering if I should have just taken a day off to stay in bed rather than pushing myself to work every day.

I weaned off of paxil and I really don't want to go back on it; I'm really trying to limit what meds I put in my body now to protect my liver, etc. I have xanax, but I use it sparingly and now take only half of .25mg when I do take it.

My friends don't want to hear about me being sick. I don't think they believe me. They usually just get really quiet or change the subject. Or they try to relate it to something they know ("I get that too") or try to one-up it.

And then there's everything I keep trying to share on social media for Lyme Disease Awareness which is just getting no reaction....I'm not looking for sympathy, just some sort of discussion or interaction or acknowledgement of the disease. And, yeah, it would be nice if someone asked how I was feeling...but I know better by now...it's like I don't exist anymore to most people.

I don't know, maybe I am just crazy. Or maybe it's an emotional herx? I feel like I'm losing my mind...none of this seems real anymore.

You are NOT crazy, Pmm!!! I get that way too. Have you or are you willing to try any herbs for the anxiety? They would be something that you would need to stay on for better effectiveness rather than taking 'when needed'.

Sometimes, there just is no good reason for feeling this way, except that our bodies are hard at work to heal and detox 24/7 and it just gets to us. I think upping your detox is a good place to start though.

Can you take a few days off? Just to let your body rest and to get your feet back under you? If not, do be sure to take good advantage of the upcoming weekend. Rest all you can, keeping things just a low key as you can.

Most people don't have any idea how to respond to us, so try to not be too hurt or disappointed. I mean it S*cks, but we can't really blame them (at least all but those that try to "one up" us - that's just stupid, who's competing for feeling the worse???). It's hard to understand what we go through day in and day out.

My mom is a very recent 'convert' to understanding what I'm dealing with, but she's never really been sick, other than with walking pneumonia once - but even that was short term stuff compared to this, so she really can't imagine what it's like. She does try though, so I cut her a ton of slack when I need to - which is still most of the time. LOL, but she's trying to understand. That alone means a lot to me, as I've had these infections since I was a very young child -and she didn't believe me back then - she believed the doctors that were saying that I was healthy.

Try avoiding social media for a few days until you get your 'zest' for dealing with people back more. Take this time to concentrate on pampering your body and mind before 'attending' to other people.

And, I hope this is very short lived!

Hi pmm73 -

I've had terrible neuro-psycho herxes throughout treatment, which are the neurotransmitters getting out of whack due to neuro issues. Neurotransmitter function is from a whole chemical process in your brain involving hormones and other chemicals and it's quite complex. Imbalances can make you feel crazy - so many of us understand what you're feeling. But you are NOT crazy. And you are so brave for going off the anti-depressants.

The neurotransmitters can also become imbalanced from GI distress or dysfunction - science finally proved the gut-brain connection and GI issues can sometimes cause mood imbalances from neurotransmitters gone awry. So that would be another area to consider - is your diet good? do you have any gut damage that might prevent proper absorption of nutrients, supplements, meds? Or even leaky gut? Do you have any yeast/fungal issues?

GI detoxing (especially a binder) is really helpful for so many of these symptoms.

I have also had good success when I flare like that by taking Nurimedix bur bur and also Pinella tinctures for brain detox.

It's also necessary for a lot of us to check hormone levels, thryoid, adrenals, etc. as they are common symptom sources.

I totally agree w/ Traveler about avoiding social media and maybe even the "marginally-supportive" friends and family right now They take energy you need for yourself and healing. When you're feeling stronger, I think it's OK and sometimes necessary to help explain to them what you do and don't need. If we do it the right way, some people respond with relief, interest and better support. ;)

Be good to yourself - do some breathing exercises, maybe a nice detox bath...

-p

ahh yes, been there too. I'm so glad you're figuring it all out. It's all so complex.

No need to feel foolish... just do whatever you need to do!

-p

Sorry to hear that things are rough pmm73. I'm glad to know that you've had some gut improvements with your new Dr. I might pick your brain later on too as I just started seeing a new LLND and we're focusing on gut health.

As for the Paxil, I so understand about wanting to limit meds in the body. I go back and forth on those types too. Recently my anxiety has been helped a bit by Lemon Balm if you'd like to give that a go, plus I've heard of a homeopathic remedy (that I have not yet tried) that is supposed to be good for anxiety. But if stress/anxiety/depression starts flaring up too much and you felt that Paxil was a good support tool, then it might be worth considering going back on it. As Piroutte said, it is all so complex and figuring it out can be a struggle, but I'm glad that you have the new Dr. on your side as a guide. Way to hang in there!

I'm GLAD you posted!! You were concerned and reached out to us!!! That's what this is about!

But, I'm also very happy to hear that you figured it out pretty quickly too!! Eating is one of my biggest challenges. I have no appetite and food just doesn't taste good any more - so I have to force myself to eat every day. I simply look at it like taking my herbs - it's not something I want to do, but something that I need to do a few times every day.

Do what you need to do to remember to eat or take what you need to. I have notes in my kitchen reminding me to take my kefir, and notes to remember to eat too. We gotta do what we gotta do. =/