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Posted 6/11/2006 9:47 AM (GMT 0)
Hi,

My name is Melanie and I'm new here.  I've posted on other boards about my problem, but nobody has ever replied.  I posted on this website under anxiety/panic, and have had several replies so far.  So I'm hoping that someone here can help me.  I'll try to make this as brief as I can.  For 2 years, (it just ended), I was really sick with dangerously low blood pressure.  It was so low that I could not function.  Dr. finally got it stabilized, I regained some energy and started over doing it.  It just felt so good.  My problems started a long time ago with a huge amount of stress, ie, dealing with an alcoholic husband, the sudden death of my father, the sudden deaths of 2 very, very good friends, one of which was murdered and my ex-fiancee, the love of my life, who was also murdered. (Those three all died starting in September of last year, 2 1/2 months apart).  I'm lonely, bored and depressed.  I am also a huge hypochondriac, didn't use to be, but am now.  Last January, after dealing with my husbands 3 week binge, of which he was very abusive mentally and verbally, I moved this huge Christmas tree out of our house.  I hadn't done anything like that in a year and a half.  Shortly after that I started having neck tension.  Stayed in my neck for about a week and a half, then traveled down into my shoulders and upper back, the up into the back of my head.  My neck, shoulders, shoulder blades and upper back are tight as boards.  I am currently seeing a chiropractor who is doing deep ultra sound on them.  January 26th of this year I had a CT scan done for headaches which came back normal.  Didn't believe that test.  Worried myself sick that the headaches were from a brain tumor.  March 16th, I had an MRI done w/wo contrast, also normal.  I even have the films, and they are so detailed that a layman could see a tumor there.  My dr. looked at them and saw nothing wrong.

I'm still having all this tension, and these headaches, everyday.  They did go away for about a month, and I started really overdoing it, and they came right back.

Now I"m worried about that MRI.  What if there were something really small there, and it's grown in 2 1/2 months?  Everything I've heard says that is NOT likely at all, but I cannot be convinced.

This is the BEST board I've been to, and I'm hoping somebody can give me some answers.

Like.....do you think these headaches have anything to do with this horrible tension in my neck, etc.?  Also, the MRI showed sinus infection in every sinus in my head.  So I have sinus headaches on top of the ones in the back of my head.  They aren't severe, but I'm still scared.

Thanks in advance.

All the best,

Melanie

I might as well add that I also have an infection pocket on my left tonsil that has been there for 3 months now, plus an ear infection and fluid behind the eardrum that will NOT go away.

Posted 6/11/2006 11:39 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Melanie,

I responded to you on the A/P board, but this board is where I spend most of my time. I have had migraine for over 30 years!

It sound to me as though you are very run down and overtired so your body is not as resistant to infection, like your tonsil and sinus infections. It also sounds as if you are suffering from tension headaches, which in themselves are not harmful at all, but they can be very painful. Please try not to be scared! I know the whole A/P thing doesn't help here but truly if there was anything at all to be concerned about the MRI would have shown it up, so the fact that it is clear is very good news - I know you find difficulty believing that, but truly it is - keep telling yourself that it is!!

Sometimes it is only self-talk that can keep you going. You are doing really well under the awful circumstances that you find yourself, keep your chin up, and post again to keep us in touch about how you get on. Take care Ann.
Posted 6/12/2006 3:58 AM (GMT 0)

Thank you for both of your replies.  I just don't know what to do with this problem.  I try so hard to convince myself that nothing is wrong, but I just can't seem to do it.  I had myself so worked up over "brain tumor" tonight that I was literally shaking.  I have a horrible headache right now, it's eased up some since I cried a little bit over ex-fiancee's death, my nose started running, so I know it's a sinus headache.  It hurt all across my forehead, left cheekbone with shooting pains into my left ear, and on the top front of my head.  My husband also said that my shoulders and neck muscles are as hard as our dining room table.

I think what I want to try to find out is if there is any possibiliity that there may have been something so very tiny that the radiologist couldn't see, and now, almost 3 months later, has grown.  I have no other neurological symptoms though, just these headaches.  I've already had 2 drs. tell me that the possibility of that is slim to none, none being their first choice.

I think it's time to find a good psychologist I guess.

Again, thanks for your replies.

Melanie

Posted 6/12/2006 12:06 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Melanie,

I really feel for you as you have got yourself into a viscious circle of worrying and headaches - which produces more worrying and more headaches, I have been there done that!!!

I will support you on here as best I can but I am not a Doctor and have no medical training, I can only speak from my own life experience.

But I think you have answered your own question, because as you said at the end of your post that you think it is time to find a good Psychologist, and I think you are right. You need someone professionally who can help you through this, and we are here to support you, so post and vent here all you like. I will keep you in my prayers. Let us know what happens, take care, Ann.
Posted 6/13/2006 2:39 AM (GMT 0)

Thanks again for another reply.  I'm just getting sick of these headaches.  They've been going on for 5 months now.  I normally do not wake up with them, didn't today, and I felt so good and happy, till I took that Hydrocodone and sat on this computer all day long.  Then I started getting that headache back.  I have very poor posture at this computer, I do know that.  I've also wondered about rebound headaches from taking waaaay too much Hydocodone for a lower back problem.

I got my MRI films out today and looked them all over again, didn't see a thing wrong, and believe me, if you'll look at an abnormal brain MRI on this internet, those tumors really stand out.  I can even find them.  (Please, don't do that though, I don't anymore myself).  I have this perfect looking brain and lots of headaches.  It does NOT hurt if I sneeze, bend over or cough, and the weird thing about this headache is that it moves all over my head all the time.  Weird.  It moves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I think that's a good thing though, because I have heard that the "other" headaches are pretty much localized.

I've done a little better today after reading your 2 posts here.  Yes, I did develop another "moving" headache this afternoon, but I didn't panic about it.  And I thank you for that.  Because of your reassurance, I think that's why I didn't.

God bless you, you deserve it,

Melanie

Posted 6/13/2006 9:41 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Melanie,

We all need reassurance from time to time - I stress need! - for all sorts of things - I am just glad to be able to help you in any way I can.

Unfortunately meds with codeine in them and other over the counter painkillers mess up a migraneurs physiological response to pain. So this means that the more painkillers you take (even if it's for say toothache or backache) the more it interferes with with the pain receptors thus giving rebound headaches which can be just as bad as the originals!! This brings on another vicious circle of events giving you more headahces. Now, do not worry about this, have a talk to you Doctor preferably a Neurologist and together try to work out a regime by where you can create the minimum rebound headaches or, you never know maybe none at all. Take care Ann.
Posted 6/15/2006 5:20 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Ann and thanks again for your reply.

I'm beginning to wonder about rebound headaches.  I'd never even heard of them till I started googling.  I haven't told anybody about my hydrocodone/Tylenol #3 addiction.  I have severe lower back pain, and my dr. put me on the Ty 3's, but for a long time, I rarely took them.  Then several personal, very devastating events happened, and I started abusing them.  Finally talked my dr. into switching me to Hydrocodone.  This has been less than a year ago.  So basically I went from taking practically none, to "numbing" myself from the emotional pain by taking too many Hydros.  I think it's just about the time that the headaches started too.  I gradually increased the amount of Hydro that I was taking till I finally got up to 14 of them per day.  I was having headaches, mild ones, and I was tired all the time.  Convinced I had that brain tumor, had CT, it was negative.  Kept taking Hydro's.  I remember one day I only had 2 left, I took both of them at the same time when I got up, called the prescription in to be refilled, husband forgot to pick them up, and that night I had the worst headache I think I've ever had.  I did sleep, but it was bad when I woke up.  So bad that he left work on his lunch hour and picked up the prescription.  I took 2 at a time, and within about 45 minutes, the headache was gone.  But I was still having them, so I had the MRI done, negative as well.  I finally got sick and tired of being sleepy all the time and started tapering off of them.  I started a fast taper, then slowed down.  I'm still doing that, I'm now down to 4 or 5 a day, but my headaches are frequent and they seem to hurt worse.  So, of course with the P/A, I think that they have missed something very, very small, and in 3 months time it has grown.  This is terrible.

Will you please tell me what you think about what I've written here?  Because if you think it may be the reason, I'm calling my dr. tomorrow, or as soon as I hear back from you.  This has GOT to STOP.

Thanks so much for your help.  I sure do appreciate you.  I've noticed how many people you help on these boards, and I really believe that God will bless you for that.

All the best,

Melanie

Posted 6/15/2006 2:59 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Melanie,

You have done so well starting to taper these drugs down, keep it up! To me it looks as if you are having so many headaches you cannot tell the rebounds from any others. I think you need some advice and support from the medical profession to help you find the right balance that works for you. Yes go back to your Doctor and ask to be referred to a Neurologist.

You cannot see this yourself but you are doing so very well with this especially as you suffer with the A/P. You have seen the way to go yourself I have only given you a nudge - well done!!!! You are stronger than you think Melanie, I am rooting for you and praying for you, keep it up girl!!

Take care and let me know what you Doc says Ann.
Posted 6/26/2006 1:00 PM (GMT 0)
Melanie Hi, I'm new here also, It just sounds like too much stress hun...Too much...I have a inoperable aneurysm and I would not wish that on anyone....I've had it for 5 and half years and the pain is terrible...They found it very easily on ct and MRI....Beleive me , If you have something in your brain even very small, they would have found it...You have too much stress and you probably have way to much anxiety...Something like ativan or anxax would help a great deal....Try hard to get the stressors out of your life...There just not worth it...Live everyday to the fullest...You never know if it might be your last...Hugs, Cyndie
Posted 6/27/2006 6:52 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Cyndie,

I am so sorry to hear about your aneurysm.  Those things run in my husband's family, on his paternal grandfathers side.  Every time Brent gets a headache, I panic.  I don't let him see it, but I do.  I can't imagine living like that.  Are you scared, or are you dealing with it pretty well?  Are they watching it closely?  I will be sure to remember you in my prayers, I really will.  Again, I"m really sorry to hear that.

Thanks for responding to my post.  It helped me a lot.  I just found a website that said that if you have a negative MRI, then you won't need another one for a year or more.  So, that helped too.  My headaches have just vanished.  But, being the hypochondriac that I've become due to all these deaths, I now think I'm having trouble with my speech.  That is my ONLY symptom.  I FEEL like I'm slurring my words, when I'm really not.  I can say tongue twisters 5 times in a row, very fast, and never miss a beat, and yet I think my speech is slurred.  I hate being a hypochondriac.  I really think that all these deaths have made me so aware of my own mortality, and it's like you said, you just never know when it's going to be your time.

Well, enough said, thank you for replying, and I will be thinking about you.  Take very good care of yourself, okay?

In His love,

Melanie

Posted 6/27/2006 2:23 PM (GMT 0)
I qwould have your hubby get a MRA, to rule out a aneurysm...Because they do run in families...Some families they do, Some families they don't...But if they can find it before it burst, he will be a very lucky man...They are easily fixed now a days..But of course..There are a few of us that have them in very bad spots. That any attempt to do anything would kill us or make us a vegeatable..I had surgery in Jan 2005 (attempted surgery ) and it almost killed me. Had a stroke. And they were still not able to fix it, It was just to dangerous...So here I am, It wouldn't be so bad if the pain wasn't so horrible..But I take daily morphine and methadone and that helps alot....I've been disabled with this cause of the pain..But all in all, I've acceppted it, before it drove me nuts...because I was getting there, but a little ativan does help my nerves alot.. Hugs hun.. And try to get your hubby a MRA, just to be on the safe side....Cyndie
Posted 6/27/2006 4:49 PM (GMT 0)

Thanks Cyndie, I'll talk to him about it.  An aneurysm killed his Mother back in 1969, she had what she called a "violent" headache all the time.  The dr. first dx'd her with encephalitis and gave her antibiotics and Darvon for her headache.  Her headache never went away.  She wouldn't go to the hospital for some reason either, my husband doesn't know why.  Anyway, after 3 full weeks of suffering needlessly, she died.  Same thing happened to her father, his sister, and Brent's 11 year old 2nd cousin.  The only one that lived was his grandfather's sister, but she had hers operated on.  I'm terrified of them as a result, because I have known my husband ever since he lost his Mother, and I went to her funeral.

I don't think I should be telling you this, this was so long ago, when nothing could be done.  You never know, God just may intervene, and there may be a way , someday, for you to get yours fixed.  I pray that there will be.  I am so very sorry that you're suffering with horrible headaches.  If you ever want to e-mail me privately, feel free to do so.  My address is [email protected]

In His love,

Melanie

s

Posted 7/2/2006 1:25 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Melanie,

I'm knew here and wanted to let you know I'm here for ya!
I understand how you feel about thinking something is wrong with you and the doctors tell you everything looks fine.

My father did have a brain tumor, and it was found because he had migraines. He ended up passing away, but it could have been from lung cancer as well, he had both.

I had both a cat scan and an MRI, both came back normal.
I know for me, tension and stress can cause migraines. And The Meds your taking can be causing rebound headaches.....my Nero said that's what mine were caused from, I was taking alot of OTC meds, without relief!

Maybe changing doctors would make you feel better? Just a thought.
Best of wishes,
Amby
Posted 7/12/2006 8:45 PM (GMT 0)

Hi Amby, and thanks for your reply.

I take Hydrocodone, and way too much of it, for lower back/leg pain.  I thought rebound headaches were only caused by taking to much OTC medications.  Can Hydrocodone cause rebound headaches?  I went for over a month without a headache at all, no neck, shoulder tension, nothing, and thought I was finished with the brain tumor phobia.  Then, my DH went on yet another binge and the verbal abuse was horrific, that's the only way to describe.  The things he said to me were  horrible.  We fought constantly, I mean screaming matches.  He called me every filthy name in the book, kept taking off his wedding ring and throwing it at me, calling it a "piece of trash" (sorry DH, but that ring cost me over 500 dollars, I wouldn't call that a piece of trash), threatened to call all members of his family over to this house and "cuss" me out, he wound up going to jail for DUI, was there for 6 days, I wouldn't bail him out, then I finally did, he turned around and got drunk again for 8 more days, during which the verbal abuse was horrible.  I didn't have a headache one time during all that mess, and the day after he finally sobered up, all that tension and those headaches came back, along with slight nausea and dizziness.  I was already having nausea and dizziness when I had both CT and MRI done, or I'd be more worried I guess.  Could the headaches coming back along with the nausea and dizziness be caused by all that stress?  The phobia is back with a fury.  I"m in desperate need of reassurance now.

Sorry to unload on you, I guess I just needed to ramble.

Again, thanks for your reply.  I really appreciate it.

All the best to you,

Melanie

Posted 7/12/2006 9:09 PM (GMT 0)
Gee Melanie, I think you have hit the nail right on the head!!! All the rotten stuff you are going through is affecting your headaches, I don't think you need to look much further!!

I just wish I could do more to help you, my first husband was emotionally/mentally abusive and life was very tough, but once he had gone and life settled down, the headaches and anxiety hit me like a truck!! I can cope at the time of stress but I pay a high price afterwards!!

With the Hydrocodone giving you rebound headaches too, this mix of what is happening in your life I think you are doing remarkably well!! - I would challenge anyone to do any better wouldn't you?

Keep in touch, like I said before, you are stronger than you think, yeah I know you don't feel very strong but you are!!!!

take care Ann
Posted 7/13/2006 6:11 AM (GMT 0)
Sorry you suffer so much. Just a note, Hydro's not only cause rebound headaches a side effect of them is headache. (what I'm about to say is what we pain suffers hate I know I am one) for the back pain try alot of heat/ice on and off and maybe an NSAID like ultram. I've found 2 of those to be helpfull. Try simple stretches and REST. you have to rest not only your body but your mind. Also my NEURO really pushes taking no more than 2 pain meds a week (OTC or Presric) I know there are things like surgery and injury but on a regular basis its a MIRACLE rule for us headache sufferes. I really hope you find relief and peace. May God bless you and give you rest. "BE STILL and I will give you rest...God"
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