hello people of the world or pounding heads,,
when it first started about
7 months ago it was very very intense, i thought i may of been depressed and boy did i feel alone, which was not good news for my partner or my baby daughter (2 ) i was at college at the time and for me it was the most scariest thing i have done, i knew nothing about
the world and it seemed to
open up to me, and i started to see mainly the negative things, then i went on to have panic stages,, id get a racing heartbeat, and my breathing would almost feel like it wanted to stop, at night i would have to hold my nostril
open and breath deeply just to get to sleep,. my vision goes blurry along with the "Head in a vice" feeling,
i am only 24, (25 in 17 days) i have noticed that my chain of thoughts have changed and although now its not so intense, it use to be, sat here i still have the head thing and slight blur vision, i often just ask myself if its just normal and that most people just deal with it and never tell, but i too feel the impact on my home and work life,
when it first came to me i was very scared and thought alsorts of bad things were happening and have been for several blood tests and even for a test for depression, and my answers were not that i wanted to die and i felt that id rather be dead, but that i did NOT want to die, and dying scares me, as it does im terrified of it, i use to put my head under soo much pressure too, while at college i had an idea that i was going to be a very successful business manager and started to over think things, way too much , i turned in to some different person, i did not know myself anymore, and since then its been hell, i have tried to stop being so up tight and be a little more forgiving and even just have more fun with my family but some days are hard because of the head thing, ,
while at my worst i did some exercise ie jogging and some sit ups and press ups, also went swimming at least once a week for a mile (64 lengths in my pool), it was hard to focus while swimming but i just kept going and going, it seemed to work for a while, it eased the pain and i stopped doing it, now its got worse again, i am going to get some exercise and see if it makes a difference, i hope it does, i too stopped smoking and drinking 3 years ago like a few of you seemed to have done, although i did smoke weed up till the pains, i even think its down to that somtimes, and thought i was going mad, as im thinking all the time about
what the cause is,, its like im talking to myself, ,but im guessing thats normal,
the only advise i could give for now is, live for the day, make it your own, help those in need to help yourself, , talk i find it works wonders, the longer you can talk for the less you will think about
it, and for me this eases the pain, so ring some one or go see some one, and talk about
anything, ,
could anyone let me know if after writing there bit on here did you feel ok for a short time,. ???
dave sorry for taking up all the page,,
