ATTENTION ALL BAGGIES

I am facing the possibility of needing an iliostomy or a colostomy wanted to know your stories on how it is to live with a bag. I'm only 30 and would like to re-marry and have another child but it comes to mind who would want to date, marry, or have sex with someone that has a permanent bag of poop attached to them. I've not worn a one-piece swimsuit in ages and I know it sounds petty but I love bikinis and don't want to give them up. The idea of the possibly is extremely depressing me, but I guess if I knew how great life could be with one then maybe I wouldn't feel so bad. So I need to hear all good and bad stories.

well i was 29 when i had mine, and had had UC for 8 years, and for along time i thought like you did, how on earth would i be able to stand this and it would be gross and all kinds of things, and then i had my son and i realized i was gonna miss out on everything, being sick all the time, so i talked to people on forums like this, it was really reall helpful, my Mom looked up some stuff and found all these famous people who had ostomies, and you would never guess who some of them are, Tony Snow, the Queen of England, Fred Astaire, even a Miss AMerica contest, and tons of others, i name them because i'm sure noone ever noticed on them. I named the miss america girl, cause that means you can still be sexy!
I wasn't too worried about the bikini, my post baby body just wasn't gonna look good in a bikini anyway, lol.
But i still wear the same cloths i wore before, i don't think anyone knows. I have mentioned this before, before i had this i never went out and just looked at people and wondered, does that peson have an ostomy? and noone else is doing that either.
anyway, i swear it is not as bad as it seems, it takes alot less time to use the bathroom this way, i emptied my bag and was done in under 2 minutes. I can take a shower and change the whole thing in less than 45 minutes, that's with shaving and all, so it doesnt' take much time, much less time that it takes to go the old fashioned way!
anyway, i hope that you get the answers you want from here, and good luck!

lol glad trying to pick girls up!
i thought about this wth the dating thing earlier today, it's not exactly the same though. I used to work with a man who had met this woman over the internet, and they had been talkign for a really really long time, she had sent him a pic of her face but not the rest of her. Well they talked on the phone and all that good stuff and he fell in love with her and she with him, even though they had really never seen each other. Well she came to visit him, and he found out then that she had had a huge surgery on her stomach (something about her stomach wasn't closed when she was born, i couldn't explain to to save my life) anyway it left her with a huge scar and a thyroid problem and she was very heavy, and had other health problems that she hadn't told him about. But it didnt'matter to him, because he loved her, for her.
What i am getting at is the old thing, that if you meet someone and they actually really love you, they won't care.

I am happy you took my advise and posted here I figured you would get more responses. I had my temp ileostomy reversed almost 3 months ago now. At first the thought of it grossed me out emptying it etc, but that got easier as time went on. Also some companies make different bag types. I liked the hollister new image line, they had a fabric cover therefore the bag didnt stick to my leg when I was outside and it was hot. I did find that the clip did give me a rash though. They do make covers and belts to hide the bag...or at least make it so your significant other doesnt see your poo when you are naked. Some people on here use tube tops to cover it during intimate times that way you dont have to worry about it flapping around either. Good luck with your decision

Stef

Dragonfly--yes thank you so much for the advise, oddly enough I had never realized there was a separate forum for ostomies. Good looking out :)

My other question girls--I own nothing but low-rise jeans, shorts, and panties. I can't stand anything that comes up to my navel. Can you still wear these? I'm a huge Abercrombie, Gap, Hollister and Old Navy shopper and I don't even think they make clothes that aren't low-rise??

Hayleybabie aka Rachel


nice pics cutey! is that your daughter? how cute you guys look....

as for you being in Ohio....

i am thinking of a beach boys song.... "I wish they all could be California girls...."

yes, that is a beer, and yes, I drink beer often...since my surgery (and sometimes before). Everyone reacts differently but after an ostomy, most people can eventually eat, drink, and do lots of things they could never dream of before surgery....

that picture was on a poker nite, (tonite is poker night too!...yes!) I am a shameless poker addict...i play at least two or three times a week....

so far, my two month record has me winning more than i have lost, but that could change...

summerstorm...thanks for the complement....as for me not having a GF....how's the song go? "you know it's hard out here for a pimp...."

haha...jk...but really, i have dated a few girls since a 6 yr relationship ended last october, but so far haven't found any girl that is perfect for me yet.....

i had to pull some typical doofus guy moves in the process too....some of us guys sure need to learn things the hard way!

i don't see your picture in the album? what's up with that?

nice screenname though

ok bye.......

I had issues with my temp ostomy surgery I ended up with a wound vac and a pig tail abscess drain in addition to the ostomy bag talk about a bag lady ugh...

I love old navy you think I owned the store by looking at my clothes.Since my Sx was emergency...yeah that one was too my resection was 1 week b4...that was emergency too...not all of my colon woke up therefore it caused toxic megacolon and it was turning necrotic. With most Sx tho you are able to discuss bag placement with an ostomy nurse therefore it will be in the spot u choose on ur belly. Mine was right at my waistline, I had to wear pants like urkle from that show in the 90s. I got old navy gouchos since they had elastic waist and could pull it over all of my contraptions. THe belt I got (not the traditional one u see on most ostomy supply sites) was by nu hope it is about 7 or 9 inches in width, It has a few layers therfore the bag goes between the layers and it even has a hole at the bottom to put the "output" end in that way you can empty without removal of the belt. Not sure how it would have worked since it wouldnt go over the drain too. I finally had the vac removed after about 2 and a half months but the darn abscess made a fistula to the incision area and was still draiing thru there too.....yeah real attractive lol

I have been alost 3 months post op since my reversal now and my hubby is still afraid to touch me and break what was done...our 2 yr wedding anniv is next month lol yeah its frustrating but even tho the doc said 6 weeks post op he wants to wait since my full return to work limitations are off in about a week and a half...granted they laid me off at that job once they found i had limitations for 3 weeks but their loss...shoot I was at work Feb 11 in the am taking care of the in hospital animals...later that day I was admitted into the hospital...cant say I had no work ethic.

My husband and I want kids...he has a 14 yr old from his ex fiance...she cheated on him 1 monmth b4 the wedding her loss lol. My husband is 41 and I am 28 and am in the I want to be a mom stage and if the colonoscopy shows all clear come january I get the clean bill of health to start trying from my GI. I am on maint meds to prevent it from regenerating elsewhere but he is a CD specialist and has done much research and held conferences on CD meds and pregnancy... I changed GIs after my whole ordeal this yr...my old one thought I had a bug pfffft

ok sorry had to vent...sorry for typos still suffereing from CD related joint pain and will be starting humira for that soon...been up since 2am with joint pain...pain meds wire me rather than make me sleepy so they dont help me get the sleep I need...

Good luck with your decision at times I still wish I had the bag since my gut is still getting use to working again...having D slowly getting better tho and hey I got a new job and start in a week as a medical receptionist...they wanted someone with med xp and med terms little do they know what I know well I need my bed...fallig asleep isnt my issue its stayting asleep...grr not even ambien helping at this point cuz of the pain

Haleybaby - I just had one surgery, a colectomy and ileostomy. It was a last resort, sort of. I had UC (HEH - I can say HAD now, not HAVE - WHEEE!), Anyway, I had UC, and I was Steroid dependant. I began Remicade treatments, and they worked great for two years. Then my liver just stopeed accepting it. I got very jaundiced, and almost lost my liver. Thank goodness my Doctor stopeed ALL of my medications, and as the meds left my sustem, my liver got better. No permanent damage. BUT, then I couldn't control the UC, I flared, and that flare put me in the hospital. I couldn't get better without my meds, but the meds would ruin my liver. In choosing between my liver and my colon, I decided the colon had to go, so I never left the hospital, I just went into surgery. I had a hard time for the first 10 days or so, because I had been so sick going into it. Bleh. BUT, I still am sooooo happy when I think about being med free. AND when I eat a strawberry without pain.

sfgiantsjo-i love to say i HAD uc too, doesn't it make you feel free?

Summerstorm and peggy - When I typed out that reply, it was the first timw I relized I could say HAD. It was great.

summerstorm--I know exactly how you feel about 30. I turned 30 in April and I started getting depressed about 6 months ahead of time. Something about it just makes you feel like your saying a bad word or something lol. I started getting really sick right at my birthday time and was dissappointed that I didn't get to celebrate like I wanted. No awesome surprise party or anything :( I am actually going through a divorce as well and our court date is mid-November sooo, come December, I am going to have myself the biggest party ever. To celebrate my birthday the way it should have been celebrated, to celebrate my divorce (he was the worst mistake of my life) and to celebrate hopefully health, happiness, and healing. WOO HOO!!!!

dragonfly--Vent when and where ever you need too! :) I think that's the only thing that does keep us mentally sane. :)

flchurchlady--So GLAD to hear about the clothing issue. Thank you.

Thanks and good job you guys, you are getting me excited and making want a bag today. Can't wait to talk to my GI tomorrow when he calls.

sfgiants...........

had to say it....uhhhh...Dodgers rule...giants drool!

we'll see....i am going to the giants game in LA this 29th......can't wait to see the Dodgers win a real game....i could care less how they do in training!

really though...that sounds fun!