Pat my bag

i'm not even sure how to respond to all that!
i actually laughed out loud at your explanations though.

sorry about your car, a bitter yankees fan maybe?

and WOO HOO for the red sox win!

now you have no excuse not to chat,  your car is screwed up, you can't go anywhere, and there is no sports

Slice,

This just happended to me! I went to have lunch with my hubby and I was on my way up to his office. His office is in the same building as the county court house so I had to go through the metal detectors. I was wearing tight pants and a tank b/c I had just come from the gym. For some reason, I set off the alarm when I went under the detector. I did not have anything on me..no keys, no wire bra..nothing. So, the man started to pat me down. UGGGHHH! He said, "what is this thing on your right side?" and he pointed to my bag. By this time, there was a line of people behind me and I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. We never figured out what set off the alarm. The best thing I could come up with was the metal detector machine was celebrating over my Gator's hat...GO GATORS!

I got "felt up" going into a Niners game. The lady frisking me definitely felt it, but she didn't say anything, probably because it's soft, and not hard like a beer bottle or a gun or whatever it is they're looking for! My husband was bummed, he thought he could use me to sneak in beers, but nope, I still get groped.

I have to admit, I wanted the Rockies to win. One of the kids on the team went to the High School I work for.

Man, went to the concert and didn't even get fondled. Could have walked in with a cooler if i wanted.
Worried about nothing.

GREAT!!! Wasn't expecting much from David Lee Roth. But i've always been a huge VH fan so we had to go. Gotta admit, i was shocked. Put on a great show. Had a great time. Not thrilled with using public bathrooms with a bunch of other drunks, but it's a small price to pay for a great show.
Next time i won't worry about the security.
The atmosphere alone was incredible. People up for VH and people just leaving the Red Sox rally down the street. Perfect.

sounds great! i haven't been to a concert in years

I must admit that your post made me laugh out loud, you're funny! 

But then I was once again hit with the realization of "le bag" and how it set's us so apart from everyone else---who have not a care in the world as to emptying their bowels. 

I was taken into the frisking room at the SLC airport on my way home from ileostomy surgery.  It was by far the worst day of my life.  They wanted to frisk me, I refused, they insisted, I told them where exactly they could go, they threatened to throw me out of the airport, called security, and I was then ordered to show them what I had in my pants. I threw them down and asked them if they were 100% satisfied.  Nice. I haven't flown since, but I realize this was probably not the norm for traveling circumstances.  I hadn't ever considered concerts.  Anyone else have experience with the pat down?  What the hell are we supposed to do? 

I'm going to a concert tonight - I let you all know tomorrow what happens. :)

LOL. It was Maroon 5 - I was taking my little sister. :) It wasn't actually that bad of a show. And not only did they not pat me down, they didn't even use those metal detector wand thingys. They barely looked in my purse. I coulda snuck an entire 6 six pack and a whole arsenal in there if I had wanted to. Now, I didn't want to, but it could have been done.

Amey...what a nightmare.....for something like that all i can say is, try and remember:

Rule No. 1 - dont' sweat the small stuff

Rule No.2 - it's all small stuff

Crohned - what an even bigger nightmare!


i actually read about someone with a seton (for an anal fistula) getting strip searched in an airport. The security guard was thrown off by the seton (a string that is tied in/out of a fistula, and the rectum) The airport doctor was summonned and he had no idea what it was. Apparently, no one at the airport believed the guy and they pulled, fairly hard, on the seton. The man later needed general anethesia to have the seton replaced. Imagine that horror!

I would totally be saying "Hey! don't tase me bro!"

my brother and I were talking about potential halloween costumes the other day. I suggested i go without a shirt and I would be "that guy with the weird bag of sh@t on his waste"

he one up'd me though, and said, no, I should wear a plain tshirt with a whole cut out for the pouch, on the tshirt, you write something like, "hey! stop staring at my sh@t bag!" or, "I'm sorry, does this make you feel uncomfortable?"

i wimped out this year, but next Halloween, i might just try it.

I laughed so hard reading this entire thread. You guys are so hilarious. I also think it's a hoot how the topics kept changing!