In the Closet?

I was dx w PD about a year ago (still not convinced--see my "Correct Diagnosis and Meds" post) and have what I view as relatively minor symptoms (and I have been told not detectable to those not in the know). I am 48 and a succesful professional with a demanding career. My question is, when to tell others? My immediate family and closest friends know but not my co-workers, neighbors, etc.

 

I am afraid if I tell work, they will look at me differently, attribute any mistake to the disease and may even be concerned about my ability to handle my responsibilities (many of which are significant). I know about discrimination laws but I do not want to rely on that to protect my career.

 

I know it is a personal decision but I would love to hear what choices others have made and how that worked out--especially if you were still going strong in your career when dx.

 

Thanks.

Geetar,My opinion,and mine only.If your pd isn't obvious to all but family ,and close friends,don't tell others until you are forced by the obvious to do so.Your employer will look at you differently,and this could present problems.I speak from the heart having had problems with both customers in my buisness,and an employer.I know others with pd disagree with me,but survival is survival.You are correct discrimination laws are not to be relied on because there are 100 ways to get around any discrimination law.Wish you the best welcome to HealingWell.Ed

Hello Geetar,

I can appreciate your situation, I was in the same position when I was diagnosed at the age of 45.  I waited for about 7 years before I told my children (2 teenagers at the time), as I wanted to let them grow up into young adults as long as could be possible without them knowing my condition.  This allowed them some precious time without having the additional stress of them knowing they had a parent with PD.  I  wasn't very symptomatic until that time.  I was able to control most of my symptons during my hours of work and any symptons that I did experience was considered to be stress related.  This worked for me because the stress symptons would be more accepable than symptons that would be considered coming from a desease such as Parkinson's.  As  you mentioned, there are laws to protect on these issues but in real terms I didn't want to fight any possible battles that I knew this would certainly cause.  I had witnessed their behaviour with other HR issues and I new my situation would jeopardize my employment with them.  The company folded before I needed to mention my PD so in the end they never found out and it was a win win situation.  Overall I worked for 10 years after being diagnosed.  Some work related things that really helped, being a manager with an office that I could escape to, competent staff that I could rely on, and my direct superior was off site.  Every person has a unique situation, so I certainly am only speaking about my own journey.  I wish you all the best in your decisions ......only you know when and what is the right thing to do.  Hearing others and how they handled their own situation often helps!

Hi,

I was diagnosed early though a little later than you - early 50's -  though looking back I can see the symptoms started to manifest around your age. I'm now in my late 50's.

Work - to tell or not to tell? For several years I did not! I worried about the same things you do  especially how others would view me and my capabilities. Then it was enough that those who were close to me such as family and friends suppported my choices. However, my carreer is stressful and as time wore on and the disease began to compete for my energies I began to reevaluate my choice. I suppose you could say I informed people in stages on a need to know basis.

I'm not saying it's the way to go but it has worked for me. Those who I informed, were and have continued to be extremely supportive. My lesson has been that my body will inform me when it's time to reassess my options. I now work on a part time basis as full time drains too much of my physical resources. That is a decision only just made this past year. My management team and human resources department have gone out of their way to be supportive and confidential.

Don't know if this anwers your questions but sometimes it just helps to hear snippets from people on the same journey.

Hayleigh