my story

"My Parkinson's, Our life"!
 
 
Hello, I'm Mark, I'm 37, i have suffered with Parkinson's for nearly 7 years now. I worked for vodafone for about 10 years,
 the last 4 of which i found it more and more difficult, my legs began to ache, i was constantly shaking, always tired,
and my walking was getting worse and worse.
 
I have always been a drinker, and occasional Cocaine user. People would look at me and say "heavy night mark?"
and i would always say yes even if i'd had a quiet one. Looking back now i think i was embarrassed and scared. It took 6 years after my
first twitchy finger ( my right hand pinky)to be diagnosed. I had cat scans, MRI scans, all manner of drug tests.
 
 
The fear of not knowing maybe worse then the knowing itself.
I remember the last time i went to see my doctor before i was diagnosed, I had just got back my last set of bloods.
She called me to her office, i walked slowly (the only way i can now) my body was shaking my feet shuffling, hoping this time she would
have news of some condition.
As i shuffled into her office i felt my shakes getting worse, more rapid, stronger more intense.
I sat,we talked about how grey a day it was then i ask "ANYTHING???
NO MARK!!" she answered.
 
I said,"please tell me am i going insane"? I cant walk, i constantly shake and I'm always tired "HELP ME!!"
"I don't know what else to do mark"....As i snapped out of my moment of madness i heard myself say,"specialist" i wanna see one.
2 months later i shuffled into the neurology department of the RUH in Bath
with my fiancee (now my strong beautiful and very patient wife)."Mr Brownlow ,that's us love".We walked slowly Into the Dr's office
there sat a a caring looking gent, Dr lyons he said "hello ,ok lets see" (I'm not sure if I'm  imagining this but I'm sure it was another grey day). "Walk down here for me please Mark" , i shuffled like usual."OK Mark I'm 99% sure you have Parkinson's"."Sorry i said,,
Parkinson's disease! No that's for old people!" "Unfortunately not Mark", said Dr Lyons. "I just need to do 1 more test".
 
Confirmed.
"OK Mark you have lost over 80% of your dopamine producing cells, you have Parkinson's".
 
For the last year or so i have been in a dark place,telling myself "its not happening" i have drank myself silly. I have been married for 4 months
my wife is an amazing women whom i love dearly, i have two children whom i love with every inch of me, i have the worlds strongest mum who means the world to me, and a loving and caring brother and dad who look out for me.I also have some amazing friends who have really stuck by me !!! Last month my wife kicked me out of home
(for drinking to much) my family had had enough, i nearly lost everyone i love, i was down as low as i could go..
 For the last month i have started pulling myself back up again, i am trying to accept my illness, i have cut my drinking by 80%
and I'm starting to enjoy my life and family again.
 
If you are reading this I'm sure u have, or someone you love dearly has been touched by this irritating and frankly rude disease,
so you know the feeling when u hear the words "PARKINSON'S DISEASE"!!
 
I write this letter to help me accept my Parkinson's, but in doing so i hope to help others see
"YOU CAN FIGHT BACK"
 
 
Happy shuffling

Mark,I'm sorry to hear that you have been thru so much,but glad to hear that you are trying to kick the alcohol.Are you attending A.A.?pd is everything you say,and more,but for your sake ,and that of your family,and friends you got to not let it conquer you.I try to live by these words.I have parkinson's it does not have me.I'm going to keep going even if I have to crawl to get there.A good neurologist,and the correct meds can make a world of difference as does exercise.Nothing however is more effective on this disease then a good attitude,and it looks like you are on the road to achieving one.I wish you the best in your journey,and although slow to respond in some cases,I can always be reached here welcome to HealingWell.Ed

Very interesting story Mark. Thanks for telling it. It is good to hear you are pulling things together. PD is tough. I have always enjoyed a drink or 2 (or 3 or...) and I have found I have to cut back because it makes my PD symptoms worse, especially the next day. It's a bummer but things could be worse.

about this forum, many people (like me) only check it once a week or so and, even then, I often do not have time to respond which means it can take a while to get a response. If you can find a good live support group, you should--it helps a lot. Either way, this is a good resource.

Take care.